Mohitness {मोहितपन}

84 Tears available as ebook & Paperback

2012-01-25T10:18:00.000-08:00

84 Tears, Historical Fiction & Poetry-Comic on Anti-Sikh Riots, Bhopal Gas Tragedy, 1984 is now available as ebook & print version on Pothi networks. Coming soon with other publishers.

http://pothi.com/pothi/book/ebook-mohit-sharma-trendster-84-tears

Desi-Pun! - Story Collection by Mohit Sharma

2012-01-25T10:05:00.000-08:00

                                                                                          Desi-Pun!
                                                                                  Yo Pun Intended
                                                                         Almost 25 Indiastic Stories

- Mohit Sharma

Is available on multiple publishing networks & channels –

Paperback –

Pothi
http://pothi.com/pothi/book/mohit-sharma-trendster-desi-pun

I Proclaim
http://i-proclaimbookstore.com/deyopunin.html

Create Space

Dorrance Publishing

Cinnamon Teal

eBook –

Smashwords
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/121555

Lulu
http://www.lulu.com/product/ebook/desi-pun/18821813

Pothi
http://pothi.com/pothi/book/ebook-mohit-sharma-trendster-desi-pun

I Proclaim
http://i-proclaimbookstore.com/deyopunin.html

Cinnamon Teal

Create Space

Soon will be available with few more Publishers.

Indi Horror my 3rd eBook

2011-10-30T08:47:00.000-07:00

Ebook Description

Horror stories with Indian backdrops. Characters, scenes, thrill-horror creating elements have a distinct Indian touch. Apart from the horror element this book helps in the study of contrasts & analysis that how common elements like Love, Horror etc, change so much with change in backdrop(s). Language - Hindi. Conversion of Hindi fonts for reading formats is below average, so, used English text. English translation of these stories & comic version will also come in future.

ISBN: 978-1-4660-4974-1

Web-link of 'Indi Horror' eBook -

http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/100432

Coming Soon : 'Pogrom 84' Poetic Comic

2011-10-13T07:46:00.000-07:00

Artworks from 'Pogrom 84', based on Anti-Sikh riots. My Poetic Comic, Coming soon!

"मरो मेरे साथ!" My Second eBook

2011-10-10T15:23:00.000-07:00

क्या आत्मायें प्रतिशोध मे किसी विक्षिप्त की तरह बर्ताव कर सकती है? क्या आप आत्माओ को पागल कह सकते है?...शायद हाँ!

बांधव गाँव मे घूम रही है एक अतृप्त, पागल आत्मा जो मरने के बाद चाहती है अपनी मौत का बदला पर जो दोषी नहीं है उनसे कैसा बदला? वो देना चाहती है एक संदेश की "कभी किसी काम मे किसी का साथ मत दो और अगर दो तो...मरो मेरे साथ!"

This Horror Story, ebook is available free on Pothi.com channels and Smashwords networks.

Free ebook (Maro Mere Saath)

by Mohit Sharma "Trendster", मोहित शर्मा (ज़हन)

'The Indus Litmus' Online Newspaper by Mohit Sharma

2011-09-12T16:19:00.000-07:00

Web-link of my online newspaper, 'The Indus Litmus' (Subscribe to read) :) -

The Indus Litmus (Paper.li)

First Issue -12 September, 2011

Flight 297 (My e-Book on Pothi Network)

2011-09-03T01:35:00.000-07:00

Heres the link....

Flight 297 (Free eBook)

Description of "Flight 297"

India-1980s : A Domestic Passenger Aeroplane "Flight 297" disappears with 172 on board due to casual approach by Air Traffic Controller, Dinesh. Officials believed that the missing flight almost certainly crashed. Amid increasing public pressure Dinesh is going back to his country Fiji. Have a happy & safe journey, Dinesh! First Community Comic Project by Freelance Talents from few Online Comic Forums & websites. The fiction idea and random name finalized in the year 2007 (Raj Comics Forums) and has no relation with "Flight 297-Atlanta to Houston Incident (Year 2009)"

....84 की टीस (Pogrom 84)

2011-05-25T10:38:00.000-07:00

1984 के सिख विरोधी दंगे या उनका सामुदायिक संहार श्रीमती इंदिरा गाँधी की मृत्यु के बाद शुरू हुआ भारत का वो काला अध्याय है जिसने हजारो लोगो की बलि ली और कई ज़िंदगियाँ जीते जी बर्बाद हुयी.. लाखो बेघर हुए... और उसके बाद...विडंबना यह है की इतनी बड़ी घटना के बाद कुछ नहीं हुआ. 11 कमीशन बैठाकर औपचारिकता निभाई गयी....हर साल मातम मनाया गया. इस अध्याय से जुडी बातों और तथ्यों को इस कदर मिटा दिया गया और धुन्दला कर दिया गया की आज की पीढ़ी को यह दिखना बंद हो गया की हमारे देश मे ऐसा भी कुछ हुआ था.

यह कविता समर्पित है उन सभी मासूम को और आधारित है आँखों देखे वर्णन और दृश्यों पर!

उस बेरहम वक़्त को झेलती एक जवान सिख लड़की की कहानी......

....84 की टीस (Pogrom 84)

वीरे पग ना पहनियो,
के किस्मत फिर जायेगी.
बरसो टली क़यामत,
आज बस यूँ आयेगी....

आँखों देखा मंज़र क्यों ये दिल ना माने?
खालिस्तानी बोली भिंदरवाले जाने.
आँगन लाल है मेरा, रो-रो लाल है आँखें.

सुबह जिनके पैरो पर अपने हाथ लगाये,
शाम को चिथड़ो मे से हाथ बस पैर वो आये.

अपनी फसले जलाई,
दीवारे घर की ढहाई.
फिर भी मिली ना ठंडक...
तो पग विच आग लगाई.

सीने पर जो वज़न लदा ऐसे,
सांस लूँ अब बता मै कैसे?
देखे कोई मुझे आसमां से,
खोल रखा है घर के दरो को,
आओ-आओ मुझे मार डालो.

गूँजते नारों ने बताया,
जिसमे मैंने होश संभाला,
हर सावन का झूला डाला,
मेरा देश है वो पराया!

रंगीन टी.वी. जो तू प्यार से लाया,
लाल सड़क पर उसमे तुझे मरता दिखाया.
ढकने सावन को पतझड़ आया,
अब लंगर नहीं लगाता गली का गुरुद्वारा.

भारी और नम हवा कुछ बताये....
खून की गंध अपनों की लाये.
कहते किसको क़यामत पता क्या?
लुट गया मेरा जो भी जहाँ था.

दौड़ी बी जी मेरी चौक तक यूँ,
कितनी चीखें सुनी क्या बताऊँ?
हार कर कानो पर हाथ आये,
तब भी ज़ेहन से चीखें ना जाये.

राशन-वोटर कार्ड कभी अपने काम ना आये,
सरकारी दफ्तरों से उनकी लिस्ट वो लाये.
सुर्ख निशान घरो पे हमारे बनाये,
सोचती हूँ कहाँ है उसका कलेजा?
लाशों से जो वो लिस्ट मिलाये.

जीते जी मैंने इज्ज़त बचा ली,
खुद ही अपनी नस काट डाली.
बेरहम मौत तब भी ना आये,
दर्द अब तो सहा ना जाये.

घर मे रहकर याद घरवालो की सताये,
पहुंची हूँ मै घिसट कर छत तक....और कुदूँगी...
....क्यों?
...क्योकि...ऊपर देख! मेरे बी जी-वीरा मुझे बुलाये!

The End!

"क्लेवरता" (Cleverta) मतलब चालाकी!

2011-05-16T13:48:00.000-07:00

"गर्मियों की छुट्टियाँ पड़ी है इस बार ख़ूब सारे दोस्त बनाऊंगा. पापा की जॉब ऐसी है की हर एक-दो साल मे उनका एक शहर से दूसरे शहर ट्रांसफर हो जाता है....कोई पक्का दोस्त बनता ही नहीं जैसे पिक्चरो और सिरियलो मे दिखाते है.

छुट्टी पड़ने से पहले किसी क्लासमेट का घर नहीं पूछा....अब मेरी सोशल स्टडीज़ की क्लास वर्क कॉपी और व्याकरण की अभ्यास पुस्तिका खो गयी है. अब पता नहीं कैसे काम पूरा होगा. पहले दिन ही टेंशन आ गयी. पापा ने भी इतने दूर के स्कूल मे एडमिशन दिलवाया की कोई क्लासफेलो पास मे रहता भी नहीं. तेरे भैया कभी राजा की मंडी की तरफ जाए तो बताइयो वहाँ मेरे स्कूल वाले दोस्त के पापा की शॉप है.

आज पहला दिन है छुट्टियों का और मामा जी आ रहे है. वैसे जब भी मेहमान, रिश्तेदार आते है मुझे बड़ा मज़ा आता है कुछ रिश्तेदारों को छोड़ कर, सब पैसे दे ही देते है. जो ऐसे ही कुछ देर के काम से आते है उनके लिए ख़ास नाश्ता मँगाया और बनाया जाता है. समोसे, टिक्की, रसगुल्ले, बर्फी, क्रीम रोल, पेस्ट्री, पेटिज़.....हाय! बताने मे ही मुँह मे पानी आ गया. ऊपर से जो बिस्कुट-नमकीन-केक के पेकिट्स खोलने की घर वालो की तरफ से मुझे मनाही होती है वो भी मम्मी अपने आप आये हुए अतिथियों के लिए परोस देती है. पर रसोई से ड्राइंग रूम तक आने मे ही मै दो-चार बिस्कुट-केक, आदि मुँह मे रख ही लेता हूँ फिर जल्दी से बिना कुछ बोले भाग आता हूँ....कई बार तो नमस्ते करने के लिए मुँह मे भरा सामान ख़त्म करके लौटना पड़ता है. एक बार उनके सामने नाश्ता रखने के बाद मै उनके जाने का इंतज़ार करने लगता हूँ. अब जो अपरिचित या कम जान पहचान वाले मेहमान होते है वो शर्म के मारे कम खाते है. उनके जाने के बाद पता चलता है की मँगाए 6 समोसे थे खाए गए सिर्फ 3 ....उसपर भी मै जल्दी नहीं करता, शांत बच्चा बना रहता हूँ. मम्मी-पापा खुद बुलाते है की बेटा ये समोसे-केक, आदि बच रहा है खा ले.....और फिर मै आराम से एक राजा की तरह सब ग्रहण करता हूँ.

जो रिश्तेदार घर मे मिलने और कुछ दिन रुकने के प्लान से आते है उनके लिए अलग बर्ताव करना पड़ता है. अपनी किताबो की अलमारी लगानी पड़ती है, हर चीज़ सही जगह पर रखनी पड़ती है, जल्दी सोना और जल्दी उठना पड़ता है ताकि आये हुए मेहमान पर अच्छा असर पड़े....ये सब करने से, बाद मे मम्मी-पापा की शाबाशी और कुछ बातों मे छुट तक मिल जाती है. मेहमानों की मदद करो, उन्हें बाज़ार घुमाने ले जाओ तो मुझे भी कुछ एक्स्ट्रा खाने की चीज़ या कपडे दिलवा देते है वो. एक बड़ी ज़रूरी बात अतिथियों के पैर रोज़ छुओ और नमस्ते, गुड मोर्निंग जो आपके यहाँ चलता हो वो भी बराबर करते रहो.....अच्छा बाई चांस भूल भी जाओ तो उनके जाते वक़्त तो ज़रूर उनके पैर बड़ी श्रद्धा से छुओ क्योकि तभी तो उन्हें हज़ार-पाँच सौ का नोट देना याद रहता है. वैसे अभी तो मेरे कंजक वाले पैसे चल रहे है....तब इतनी कन्याओ मे मै अकेला लांगुरिया था, इतने घरो मे जीमे हम लोग....किसी घर से हर बच्चे ने 10 रुपये से कम नहीं लिए. अच्छा रिंकू! कल बादाम मिल्क पिया था, आज भी मन कर रहा है...मै जा रहा हूँ....मेरी साईकल मे हवा कम है नहीं तो तुझे भी ले जाता. याद रखियो जो बातें मैंने बताई है तुझे....अच्छा, बाय! सुना तूने विडियो गेम लिया...आइयों...हाँ, घर लेकर आइयो! चल फिर....बाय!"

Table Hockey (School Version)

2011-05-05T19:09:00.000-07:00

Table Hockey {Also Known As Bench Hockey} (School Version)

One of the few Underground Extra Curricular Activities allowed in RLB, School Invention, Indoor Game.

Mini version of Field Hockey to cure the boredom in School. Invention, Research & Development by Dr. Mohit Sharma (Trendster), Yes I know credits should be posted after the writeup.

Hockey Stick = Pen/Pencil,

Goal Post = Pencil Box,

Ball = Eraser/Sharpener,

Duration : Depends on Recess, Free Period(s) or time you get in between the classes.

Number of Player : 2 to 6 (Max. 6 is our record Rani Laxmi Bai Memorial Senior Secondary School, Vikas Nagar, Lucknow...but you can have more players if you borrow a bench from local zoo's main attraction....Hippo).

*) - 2 Pencil Boxes are placed on the edges of bench in horizontal position. Ball hitting anywhere on the box is goal.

*) - You can dribble or hit the ball from anywhere on the bench but goal is only valid when the shot is taken after the "centre line" (marked by permanent marker) dividing bench in 2 equal halves.

*) - You can only tackle with Hockey sticks. No hand to ball contact, (...this sounds double meaning or Am I over-conscious? What...Both?) If a players hand touches the ball while tackling, hitting, dribbling then the play is stopped, ball is placed at the point of impact (where Hand Penalty Occurred) on the bench. Both players get chance to possess the ball after the count of 3....it's luck whoever hits first after the count.

*) - If ball goes out of play (bench) [For example : You unintentionally hit a shot right towards your crush's seat...she ignores it & manages her pony as usual...huh! or sharpener imitates bullet & fixes itself to some untraceable location. Next day, you see it in a Pencil Box of a class fellow but have no courage to ask him/her about that sharpener.] Then the person who made last impact on the ball loses the possession of ball & another player gets chance to hit or dribble the ball from the point (side of bench) where ball left the bench or flied/dropped from the bench..worst part is the dust, even moisture (sometimes dirty) the ball gathers within the few seconds.....from when it left the play to when it is recovered from varied locations with a common backdrop of shoes-legs-dust & paper balls.

*) - You can only drag your Hockey Stick but can never "fly", "jump" (using your hand) to get advantage.

*) - If number of goals scored by teams are equal & time is less...[For Example : A teacher unexpectedly takes an extra class in a free period...I mean come on! man you are getting less than 500 Rupees per day....so, why are you working so hard? Or is this your frustration on school management...but we are students..jeez...] Then provision of 5 penalty strokes taken by each team from the "Quarter Line" (1/4 of the Bench length) marked not as dark as "Centre Line" as it is not used that much.

Author notes :

*) - Facebook Page of Table/Bench Hockey -

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Table-Hockey-School-Version/214773321884665?ref=ts

*) - Hockey -

Hockey is a family of sports in which two teams play against each other by trying to maneuver a ball or a puck into the opponent's goal using a hockey stick. Different forms of hockey are Air Hockey, Underwater Hockey, Box Hockey, etc. More info.....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hockey

*) - Last played this Game 5 Years ago.

/~युद्धवीर~/

2011-03-26T08:39:00.000-07:00

Fiction

"टीचर ने कहा है की अगर बोर्डस मे किसी को नाम बदलवाना है तो अभी बदलवा ले. सब मुझे टीचर के सामने ही चिढाने लगे की मैडम इनका बदलवा दीजिये. मेरा नाम युद्धवीर है. नाम तो अच्छा है पर कद और शरीर साधारण से भी कम है जिस वजह से मेरे सहपाठी और दोस्त मुझे चिढाते है की ये है युद्धवीर! पर ये नाम मेरे अभिभावकों ने बड़े अरमानो से रखा है ऐसे कैसे बदलवा दूँ? आज मुझे भी गुस्सा आ गया, मन मजबूत होना चाहिए...तन तो बस दिखावा है. ऊपर से वो टीचर भी हसने लगी, फर्जी बी.एड. कहीं की....उसका भतीजा कुशाग्र, मेरे साथ पढता था वो भी तरह-तरह के तानो से मुझसे नाम बदलवाने की बात कहने लगा. मैंने लगभग चिल्लाकर अपने टीचर से कहा "मैडम, तेज बुद्धि यानी कुशाग्र का भी नाम बदलना चाहिए......आपकी वजह से बड़ी मुश्किल से अब तक पास होता आया है. अब बोर्ड्स मे पता नहीं क्या हो?" फिर मै अगले दिन से स्कूल नहीं गया. एडमिट कार्ड पहले ही मिल गया था....अब किसी दूसरे सेंटर पर एक्साम देना था बस...फिर इंटर दूसरे स्कूल से करूँगा.

पिता जी सचिवालय मे है तो सरकारी घर मिला हुआ है. घर के बाहर बड़ा लौन है. उसमे हमने तो कुछ नहीं लगाया पर हमसे जो पहले रहते होंगे उन्होंने कई पौधे लगा रखे थे. उन पौधों को हर दूसरे दिन पानी दे देता हूँ. गर्मियों के सीजन मे रोज़ पानी देता हूँ. पानी की दिक्कत है तो पाईप की जगह 1-2 बाल्टी डाल देता हूँ. लौन मे ही 2-3 "पवित्र" तुलसी के पौधे है. मै उनको कभी पानी नहीं देता या देता हूँ तो बहुत कम जो बाल्टी मे बच जाता है सबको पानी देने के बाद बल्कि मै तो बचा हुआ पानी बाकी पौधों के पत्तो पर छिड़क देता हूँ पर तुलसी जी को दूर से नमस्कार कर लेता हूँ.

क्यों?

बात ये है की पिता जी, माता जी, भाई साहब, तीनो सुबह पूजा-पाठ करके सूर्य को जल चढ़ाते है. फिर वो तीनो अलग-अलग छोटी बाल्टी से "तुलसी जी" के पौधों को जलमग्न कर देते है. तो जब इतनी वाटर लोगिंग वो पहले ही कर देते है वो लोग तो मै तुलसी को जल क्यों दूँ? मुझे पता है कोई न कोई तो उन्हें पानी दे ही देगा. एक बार तो मुझे याद है की मै गर्मी की छुट्टियों मे नानी के वहाँ गया...कुछ दिनों बाद वापस आकर देखा की सारे पौधे गर्मी मे सुख गए है पर तुलसी जी के तीनो पौधे चटकीले हरे थे, जैसे बाकी पौधों को चिढ़ा रहे हों. तो ये रूढ़िवादिता का डर भर है. मै ये नहीं कह रहा की तुलसी को जल मत दो पर जब इतना कष्ट कर ही रहे हो तो बाकी पौधों को भी पानी दे दो. माना तुलसी का पुराणों मे वर्णन है पर कई पौधों को मारकर इक्का-दुक्का पौधों को सींचकर आपको कौनसा पुण्य मिलेगा?

घर वाले रेडियो सुनते नहीं और जिस स्कूल की बात की उनसे अब मेरा कोई मतलब नहीं....वैसे तो कई स्कूल ऐसे होते है....अच्छा सर जी...टाटा! गुड बाय!"

........समाप्त!

करण उस्ताद

2011-02-23T02:11:00.000-08:00

Fiction

"पहले जब भीख मांगी तो सब जने यह कहते थे की 'भगवान ने हाथ पैर दिए है, कुछ काम क्यों नहीं करता? हराम का क्यों खाता है?' सबसे कहने का मन करता था की तुम सबको भगवान ने हाथ पैर के अलावा बाप भी दिया है जिसने तुम्हे 20-30 साल तक पाला है. सरकारी नौकर या लाला-सेठ बनकर मुझ जैसे कीड़ो को कोसने के लायक बनाया है. जब तुम सब इतने साल हराम का खा सकते हो तो मै क्यों नहीं?

फिर जब गुटखा, सिगरेट, बीडी, पान मसाला लेकर घूमा तो वो कहते 'क्यों लोगो को नशा बेचता है? दूसरो को ज़हर देकर रोटी खाता है.' उन्हें भी मालूम है की मै तो देख सकता हूँ पर मेरी भूख कुछ नहीं देखती...अब चाहे वो सही काम करके मिले या गलत. फिर भी अपने आस-पास बैठे लोगो मे खुद को धर्मात्मा कहलाने के वास्ते ये ताना ज़रूर मारते. कुत्ते कहीं के!

बड़ा शहर न जाने क्यों भोले गाँव वालो को खींचता है. भोले कहो या पागल, मेरे लिए तो एक ही है. रब जानता है मैंने उसको कितना रोका पर मेरा छोटा भाई रेल स्टेशन पर आ गया जहाँ मै रहता था. साथ वाले रूठ गए की पहले से ठूसी जगह मे एक और भूखा आ गया. चाय वाले, चने वाले, पेपर वाले, इतने थे की किसी की बिक्री ज्यादा नहीं होती थी. कोई नया आता तो वो सबको बोझ लगता. पर अब आ गया तो आ गया....मसाला-सिगरेट बेचने मे पुलिस का लफड़ा अक्सर फंसता है....काम कोई करता है सबसे पहले हम सुत जाते है. एक दिन वो भाई को भी मेरे साथ ले गए. छोटे को अपने सामने पिटते देखा तबसे इस धंदे को छोड़ दिया. भूख की आँखें उस दिन ढक ली. फिर क्या 12 मील खेतो मे चला और कई गाजर-मूली बटोरी. हाँ-हाँ वो भी हराम की थी....अगले दिन ढाबे से नमक पार करके हम भाइयों ने बचे हुए गाजर-मूलियों को बेचा. चाकू कोई देने को तैयार नहीं तो मैंने दांतों से ही काट कर नमक लगा दिया...फिर भी कुछ ख़ास कमाई नहीं हुई. आजकल सब सेहत मे मरे रहते है....कहते है मक्खियाँ है, धूल है, कटे फल नहीं खायेंगे....अरे, खाना मिल रहा है तो खाओ न...मुझे गटर मे तैरता फल मिलेगा तो वो भी खा लूँगा. आज तक वो भी नहीं मिला.

एक दिन मेरा भाई कांवरियों के जत्थे को 9 प्लेट खिला गया उन्होंने और मंगाई तो वो मेरे पास लेने आ गया. जब तक वो उस डब्बे मे पहुँचा कांवरियों ने जनरल डिब्बा बदल लिया और पीछे चले गए. कुत....खा के तो गए ही साथ मे स्टील की प्लेटे भी ले गए. बेवक़ूफ़ भाई ट्रेन चलने तक उन्हें वहीँ ढूँढता रह गया. साथ वाले तमाशा देखते रहे पर कुछ बोले नहीं. अब ढाबे वाले को प्लेटे कैसे देते? एक आदमी से 500 का पत्ता मिला मैंने उसको बची हुई एक प्लेट पकडाई और दौड़ लगा दी खेतो की तरफ. वो चलती ट्रेन से उतरकर मेरे पीछे भागा. गरीबी और किस्मत का कभी मेल कहाँ होता है...उसको आदमी को शायद से अगले स्टेशन पर उतरना था. मै तो हाथ आया नहीं पूछ-पाछ कर वो मोटा मेरे भाई से चला पैसा वसूलने. 2 का सिक्का मिला उसको मेरे भाई की जेब से...हा हा हा...पता नहीं कितना समय था उसके पास मेरे भाई को थाने मे बिठा आया. पुलिस वालो ने उस दिन जो केस सुलझे नहीं उनका दोष भी मेरे भाई को देकर 1 साल के लिए जेल भेज दिया. सुना था की बच्चो और 18 से कम वालो के लिए अलग जेल होती है. पर लिखा-पढ़ी और वहाँ ले जाने के झंझट से बचने के वास्ते कमीनो ने 11 साल के भाई को 18 का बता दिया. मैंने भी उसको छुड़ाने की कोशिश नहीं की सोचा चलो एक साल तक राड़ कटी. रोटी मिलेगी भाई को और थोड़ी अकल भी आएगी 'बड़ो' के बीच.

अच्छा साब! कौन सा रेडिओ आता है आपका? नाम मत लेना मेरा...उस्ताद बोल देना...भाई समझ जाएगा. रिकॉर्ड हुआ की नहीं....हो रहा है...नखलऊ वालो को करण उस्ताद का सलाम....खुद ही नाम बोल दिया...काट देना हाँ...साब धंदे के टाइम आये हो....4 ट्रेन निकली वो भी सिर्फ इस पलेटफारम से...कुछ देते तो जाओ..."

मेरे शहर मे हुई सेहर...

2010-12-23T02:09:00.000-08:00

हुयी जो रौशनी कम तेरी यादों से नम आँखों मे,

उसको भी मौसम की धुंध मान लिया...

दरो-दिवार रंगी कालिख से शहर वालो ने,

उसी कालिख से शहर भर मे तेरा नाम लिखा....

मिली बरसात ज़मी से तेरी महक लायी,

क़ुदरत भी सीख गयी इंसानों सी रुसवाई.

देखी हर रस्म सरे-आम पस्त होते हुए,

कितने ज़हरीले लफ्ज़ ज़ेहन मे पेवस्त होते हुए.

दिवाली-ईद तन्हाई मे मना ली,

कोई मिलने आया नहीं तो तेरी याद की जिल्द ख़ुद पर चढ़ा ली!

मिलने की उम्मीद कभी न छूटी...

वो तो ज़माने की मसखरी से हिम्मत टूटी...

बरसो सिर्फ सपने जो देखे तेरे,

आँखें रोज़ तेरा धोखा दिखाती...तो कैसे मान लूँ की अब तू इतने पास है मेरे?

तेरे अक्स को खुद मे कहीं कैद रखा था,

पता नहीं की अब तू सामने है...या तेरा अक्स कैद से रिहा हुआ?

Sorry, Smt. Maneka Gandhi ji! (Fiction)

2010-12-15T08:05:00.000-08:00

"Who are these people? Animal Rights Activists? Why?

People working on behalf of others without payment for their time and services. Animal rights, also referred to as animal liberation, is the idea that the most basic interests of non-human animals should be afforded the same consideration as the similar interests of human beings. Why? This is super socialism. They are spending billions on animals when hundreds of people in my mega slum die annually. I am struggling for all the basic necessities like food, water, shelter, clothing, then why should I adopt a dog? I know how to read and write but I am not listening to them and I don’t want their pictorial pamphlets (for unaware and illiterate people as they call us). They say we are brainwashed….I don’t understand their logic(s) and statistics. Maybe, they are right but we are hungry!

Away from my slum, in this dark cold night, I was feeling very sad and frightened at the same time. I had never committed a murder before but today I had do so in order to save our lives. I didn't want to ruin my life just for this tiny little stupid thing. I had made up my mind. I would murder him in the dead of night and no one would ever know what happened to him. I was looking forward to a very happy life with my beautiful love. But first I had to kill this witless git. I sharpened my knife and with a loud thud, his life ended. Feeling not a little feeling of regret in my heart, I started burying him. Poor dog breathed his last in the ‘backyard’ of my hut and I felt very relieved to end this fiasco. Having some serious hatred with animals especially dogs, (and humans) I would never had let this stupid moron in my house but my wife was insisting to keep him with us. Stray Cows, Buffaloes, Goats and other plants, grass eating animals are okay as they never demand anything except causing few accidents on roads and injuring Bikers, pedestrians and rarely those rich people in their Air Conditioned Cars. But Dogs, no they are not okay because they want bread. This was the main reason of our ongoing problems. When I will get a decent job then I will gift her 1…no..2 dogs. I crossed my fingers to pray for the poor thing and started moving towards my home where a ‘happy’ life and beauteous love was waiting for me."

...The End!

Author Notes :

*) - Smt. (Shrimati) is an honorific (Hindi) used for women.

*) - Maneka Gandhi is an Indian politician, animal rights activist, environmentalist, former model.

साहिल को समीर माना....

2010-12-11T22:42:00.000-08:00

मुद्दत से दौड़ा किये जिस जन्नत सी मंजिल की ओर,
पहुँचने पर एहसास हुआ की सफ़र मे साथ लगी धुल ने उसको बेनूर किया.

और जाना की दस्तूरो ने हमेशा झूठ कहा.....

रास्ता तो बिन बोले ही धूल बनकर साथ हो लिया....

ओर एक ये मंजिल है जो पास आने पर बहाने बनाती है.

जिसको रूहानी जान छोड़ी दुनिया सारी,

उनकी मोहब्बत मे थी दुनियादारी,

आखरी दम तक लड़ने की ख्वाइश मे जाने कहाँ से दरारें आ गयी?

जिसपर नाज़ किया करते थे उस सुर्ख रंग मे कैसे काली बुज़दिली छा गयी?

शायद उस आसमाँ मे फ़रिश्ते अक्सर हमसे बिफरा किये,
हमसफ़र से हाथ की पकड़ ढीली रखी...फिर भी नसों तक नाखून गड़ गये.

थम गयी अब रफ़्तार कुछ ऐसे...हम थक गये...

और रुके हुए साहिल को अपना समीर मान बैठे!

मुद्दत से हमने ख्वाबो को देखना छोड़ दिया,

कटीली राहों पर हर कदम ने रंगीन निशान छोड़ दिया.

मंजिलो के सामने मुकद्दर मुकर गया,

ज़माने को साथ लेने के इंतज़ार मे ज़माना ही गुज़र गया.

लेबर अड्डा

2010-11-19T02:04:00.000-08:00

सुबह की नमी मे भी सुगबुगाहट आती वहाँ,
कोडियों के भाव बिकता खून पसीना जहाँ.

कितने ही बंगले, दुकाने बनाता,
कितनो के काम आता,
फिर भी हर सुबह वो मजदूर,
उसी 'लेबर अड्डे' पर खड़ा नज़र आता.

सौ श्रमिको मे एक और मेहनती मासूम मजबूर मजदूर जुड़ा,
भोर आते ही दिहाड़ी मालिको का मोल भाव शुरू हुआ.

पहला - "चालीस?"
साहब - "हट, मत ख़राब कर मेरी पॉलिश!"

दूसरा - "और कम क्या दोगे, साहब, तीस?"
साहब - "चुप! अपने आस-पास वालो से कुछ सीख!"

नए से - "तू क्या लेगा, बे?"
नया - "कुछ नहीं, बस आप दो वक़्त का खाना दे देंगे?"
साहब - "तेरे जैसा मजदूर..मेरे यहाँ क्या करेगा?
तेरे दो वक़्त का खाना तीस रुपयों से ज्यादा का पड़ेगा!"

...अब वक़्त है जाने का!

2010-11-17T22:10:00.000-08:00

हर ख्वाइश मे अक्स था इस अफसाने का,
हर कोशिश मे सपना था तुझे पाने का!
कल तलक मौके मिले तो दिल नादान बना,
आज हालत ने मौको को किया पल मे फ़ना!

माना की आज गर्दिश मे सफ़र करता हूँ,
ज़हन मे मेरे है पेवस्त हर अफसाना तेरा!
छुपाया था जिस गम को बड़ी खूबी से,
बरस गए बादल तेरी आँखों से वही नमी लेके!

जशन की आड़ मे रुखसत हुआ...साजिश थी मेरी,
बिना रुलाये तुझसे हाथ जो छुड़ाना था!
मुड़ा जो तुझसे तो खुदगर्ज़ क्यों मान लिया?
ये भी एक जरिया है गम को छुपाने का!

ज़माने भर की बुराई लादे फिरता हूँ फिर भी मगर....
पाक साफ़ दिखता है आँखों मे तेरी अक्स दीवाने का?
अपनी हस्ती पर जो हँसती फिरती...
अब वक़्त है उस दुनिया को आइना दिखाने का!

"ये उनका शहर है!" (in 'Pothiz' October 2010 Issue)

2010-10-29T02:35:00.000-07:00

Read Pothiz October 2010 Issue Online.

http://pothi.com/pothi/magazine/issue/october-2010

(Good & Bad) Company

2010-10-27T23:04:00.000-07:00

Place: A Sacred fig, Bharatpur Bird Sanctuary.

Bharatpur Bird Sanctuary (Keoladeo Ghana National Park) in Rajasthan, India is a famous avifauna sanctuary that sees thousands of rare and highly endangered birds such as the Siberian Crane come here during the winter season. Over 230 species of birds are known to have made the National Park their home.

Little Sparrow - “Dad, they are my friends. We do few things together and spend some time. At the end of the day, I return to home. I have my mind, family and life. It’s just a fraction of a day we are together. That too, not on daily basis. Sorry, I don’t understand your Good company-Bad company theory.”

Daddy Sparrow – “Beta, surroundings, neighbours, friends, colleagues, etc make a lifelong impact on almost all the creatures.”

Little Sparrow – “No, Papa, I disagree....”

Daddy Sparrow - “Alright, I will explain this with the help of some practical examples. Go and chat with that group of ‘Asian Koels’ near the lake.”

After Half an Hour.

Little Sparrow – Daddy, they are awesome birds. They knew so much about life, karma and all. They are helping numerous old and injured Birds of this place. They gave me few herbs as a present.

Daddy Sparrow – “Where do they come from?”

Little Sparrow – “Himalayas, near the ashrams of Sadhus, Yogis and even Buddhist Monasteries.”

Daddy Sparrow – “Good, now similarly make friends with those stylish and funky migratory birds, 'Greater Flamingos' stationed at the other side of the lake.”

Few Moments Later.

Little Sparrow - “Ouch Daddy, You knew everything? They poked me everywhere, snatched my herbs. They were constantly bullying, abusing and eve teasing me and many other birds. They captured few nests beating the native birds..and...”

Daddy Sparrow – “Oh! And?”

Little Sparrow – “They were from those areas of Afghanistan with many terrorist camps and bases.”

The End!

Author notes :

*) - A Sacred fig, is a species of banyan fig native to Bangladesh, India, Nepal, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, southwest China and Indochina. It is a large dry season-deciduous or semi-evergreen tree up to 30 m tall and with a trunk diameter of up to 3 m.

*) – Beta = Son. (Hindi)

*) - Greater Flamingos are the largest member of the flamingo family and they are the most widespread. They stand at 1.5 m (5 ft) tall, they have a wingspan between 1.4 and 1.7 m (4.5 - 5.5 ft) and they weigh up to 4 Kgs (8.75 lbs). They are pinkish white in colour but immature birds are grey before they get their full adult plumage. They have long, pink legs with relatively small webbed feet, and a very long neck.

Over-Disputed Champions!

2010-09-21T23:20:00.000-07:00

Saurav and Shazia (India) got wild card entry in Mixed Doubles category of Tennis Slaves Series. In international sports, the term (wild card) is perhaps best known in reference to big international sporting events such as Olympic Games or Wimbledon. Countries which fail to produce athletes able to meet performance requirements to compete are granted "wild cards", which enable them to send competitors tournaments even if those competitors' abilities are below the required standards. Though, there were few better ranked Tennis players in India but they were busy in other tournaments, injured (and some popular celebrity showing off their stardom by statements like we are focusing on Olympics...skipping 'small' tournaments).

This was second year of Egypt’s Tennis Slaves Series. There were 16 pairs in the Mixed Doubles Event. The only unique rule was the two players should be of same country which happens in big International events like Olympics, Asian Games, Commonwealth Games, etc as nations also compete in composite Medal Tally of all the events. 3 Rounds before Final (First round of 16, Quarter Finals, Semi Finals). The Indian pair, scheduled to play Chadian players, was very excited and happy as their rankings were better than the Chadian duo and the players from Chad were unseeded.

Just before the games a bitter Civil War broke out in eastern Chad and all the International Flights were canceled. Indians progressed to Quarter Finals with a W.O. or Walkover win. They practiced for 2 days before their next match. Their opponents were Markal Bass and Cindy Pass from Nepal. But on the eve of match Cindy was disqualified by World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) for doping violations in the last round of 16 match. Saurav and Shazia got their second Walkover and they were in the semis. They were happy and "Only 2 Steps...." was the only thing in their mind. Russians won their first 2 matches and were scheduled to play Indians next.

Zafira Nova, Top-seeded International star was main attraction in women's singles of the same tournament. She got injured in her singles semi-final match. She retired from the match and from the Mixed Doubles Event. Indian pair was now in Final of Egypt’s Tennis Slaves Series.

Shazia - "Everyone is focusing on singles events....media and all, no news of us 'making' it to the final?"

A reporter heard this line of Shazia when she was practicing with Saurav and quoted it in the next day's National Newspaper. Now, not "everyone" but many were talking about these two players. SMS and Internet Jokes circulated everywhere. "Register your names and you are a finalist! Hurry!"

Next, top-seeded Israeli pair. They were called Mixed Doubles Specialist with 29 titles to their credit. They were super professionals and favorites in the Sunday final.

Saturday evening, some Palestinian extremists kidnapped Israeli Players for their multiple demands. Authorities had no clue of the players on Sunday and reserve day, Monday.

Indians were declared the champions of Mixed Double Event of Egypt’s Tennis Slaves Series. The joke changed "Register and be a Champion plus a free foreign trip!"

The End!!!

Author notes -

*) - A walkover or W.O. is the awarding of a victory to a contestant because there are no other contestants, or because the other contestants have been disqualified or have forfeited.

*) - The World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) is an independent foundation created through a collective initiative led by the International Olympic Committee (IOC) to promote, coordinate and monitor the fight against drugs in sport.

जंगल का राजा (Jungle King)

2010-09-19T08:12:00.000-07:00

My first kids comic. This issue is published by Raj Comics in Hindi and English. Available in paperback and Airtel Subscribers can read this comic on Airtel Live Portal.

How to access the service :

To activate, Sms 'Comic' to 54321 and downlaod the wap link on your GPRS enabled handset OR visit Airtel Live WAP portal at live.airtelworld.com

Yeeeeaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!

भूख

2010-09-05T09:01:00.000-07:00

इच्छाओं का गला घोंटा,
उम्मीदों की चिता को सेंका.

आँसुओं को आने से पहले मन की भट्टी मे झोंका,
रिश्तो को मजबूरी का खंजर घोंपा.

मुन्ना की पढाई की बलि ली,
बाबू जी के आशीर्वाद की गर्दन रेंती.

पत्नी के दामन पर गोली मारी,
फरमाईशों का सर कुचला मारकर पत्थर भारी.

सबके सपनो की साँसें रोकी,
क्या अच्छी और क्या बुरी हर सोहबत छोड़ी.

कितनी आसानी से जिंदगी की हर चीज़ यहाँ है मिटती.
पर ये भूख.....मारे नहीं मरती!

Fire's Sermon

2010-08-30T02:54:00.000-07:00

"Shyama!"

This word, this name is placed in my memory with an audio file. Voice of my neighbor Mr. Sumit Talwar calling his wife loud and..sounding...harsh. Though, Shyama was often heard laughing and seen standing on a balcony smiling. Few neighbors residing close were amazed by such contrasting voices. One thing was sure that she was happy and everyone was unable to decipher Mr. Talwar’s expressions and actions to say that A 'muscleman', his every action and word was like a semi-slow motion and surprisingly delicate considering his heavyweight frame. Mr. Talwar’s first impression to many was ignorant and rude. Almost zero social circle, very poor attendance in festive or social gatherings, almost no facial expressions like Rahul Dravid batting on the Fourth Boring day of Cricket test match heading towards a Draw.

Yesterday was like any other day. Then I heard a blast. It was like a Bomb blast. But bomb blasts were ‘far away’ from majority of India. People rushed (or many looked) outside to expect something thrilling to change their ordinary day.

Half the house of Talwars was on fire. The cooking gas cylinder burst while Shyama was preparing food in the kitchen. Besides, Sumit was badly injured. Burnt part of his formal office clothes sticking to his body. Inert and burnt Shyama was in his hands. I don’t know about the degrees of burns but her body was a black sticky mess.

I called 101 (Fire Service) for a Fire Brigade. They told me that someone already informed them and the fire brigade is on it's way.

Sumit was crying and shouting random things. He was doing everything he never did or probably he never showed anyone except Shyama. He was repeatedly kissing her, talking to her. His trademark slow motions vanished as he jumped, bumped and ran, moved like a 'Black Cat' Commonado. His car was in a service station so he ran to all the houses in colony and asked for Help or Car to rush to Hospital but before anyone could respond he moved to next house as if he was waiting for that person’s reply for quite some time.

Few moments later the Talwars were rushed to Hospital. Fire brigade extinguished the fire. Humming sound of crowd taking, asking, calling, sharing assumptions and framed facts.

Mr. Sumit taught me (and maybe few other neighbours) a lesson....for rest of my life. Everything differs from person to person. Since then I never generalize a person by knowing some of his/her characteristics. As every individual's personality has so many aspects according to that person's upbringing, interests, profession, etc which are hidden from almost everyone. We (majority) have several stereotyped standards and if someone is not good in those specific things....we tag him/her with negative adjectives like rude, ignorant, selfish, bad, without knowing so many things about that individual.

The End!

Author notes -

*) - Rahul Dravid is one of the most experienced cricketers in the Indian national cricket team, of which he has been a regular member since 1996. Don't ask me what is cricket...cousin of Baseball.

*) - The National Security Guard is a Special Response Unit in India that has primarily been utilized for counter-terrorism activities. The NSG members are also known as Black Cat Commandos.

*) - For Fire Service and related emergencies dial 101 (in India).

ये उनका शहर है!

2010-08-25T05:58:00.000-07:00

भोपाल स्थित यूनियन कार्बाइड कम्पनी के कारखाने से एक हानिकारक गैस का रिसाव हुआ जिससे लगभग 15000 से अधिक लोगो की जान गई तथा बहुत सारे लोग अंधापन के शिकार हुए. भोपाल गैस काण्ड विश्व इतिहास का ऐसा नासूर है जो हर दिसम्बर मे बहुत बुरी टीस देता है. हालाँकि, इस घटना से पीड़ित लोगो की संख्या लाखो मे है और वहाँ जन्म लेने वाले बच्चे अब भी अपंग पैदा होते है. मुझे ये नहीं जानना की किसकी गलती है है.....मुझे बस 26 सालो के दर्द की दवा और उन करोडो आंसुओ को पोछने वाले हाथ चाहिए जिनसे सत्ता और पैसे की गंध ना आये.

जब भोपाल गैस काण्ड के दोषियों की बात होती है तो ऐसा लगता है हर चीज़ उन्होंने खरीद ली है...शायद ये शहर भी! ये ग़ज़ल भोपाल गैस त्रासदी पर लिखी है.

ये उनका शहर है!

कातिल आँधियों मे किसका ये असर है?
दिखता क्यों नहीं है हवा मे जो ज़हर है?
चीखें सूखती सी कहाँ मेरा बशर है?
ये उनका शहर है....

धुँधला आसमां क्यों शाम-ओ-सहर है?
आदमखोर जैसा लगता क्यों सफ़र है?
ढलता क्यों नहीं है ये कैसा पहर है?
ये उनका शहर है....

जानें लीलती है ख़ूनी जो नहर है.
माझी क्यों ना समझे कश्ती पर लहर है?
हुआ एक जैसा सबका क्यों हषर है?
ये उनका शहर है...

रोके क्यों ना रुकता...हर दम ये कहर है?
है सबके जो ऊपर..कहाँ उसकी मेहर है?
जानी तेरी रहमत किस्मत जो सिफर है!
ये उनका शहर है....

इंसानों को तोले दौलत का ग़दर है!
नज़र जाए जहाँ तक मौत का मंज़र है!
उजड़ी बस्तियों मे मेरा घर किधर है?
ये उनका शहर है...

मंद है यह समाज!

2010-08-23T08:49:00.000-07:00

शारीरिक या मानसिक रूप से अपंग लोगो को हमेशा से समाज मे उपेक्षित नज़रो से देखा जाता है. उनसे न ज्यादा उमीदें लगायी जाती है और न ही उनके विकास पर ध्यान दिया जाता है. अगर उनका विकास ढेर सारे स्नेह और सहनशीलता के साथ हो तो वो भी हमारे समाज की प्रगति मे महत्त्वपूर्ण योगदान दे सकते है. ये कविता इस विषय पर है.-

वो मासूम है,
पर मजबूर नहीं.
वो तड़प है,
पर नासूर नहीं.

उनके जीवन के हर कदम पर मुश्किल पल है आते,
पर बदले मे वो हमसे सहानुभूति नहीं चाहते.

वो लडखडाये,
उन्हें चलने दो.
वो गिर जाये,
उन्हें संभलने दो.
वो 'हम' मे से एक है,
उन्हें 'इस' एहसास के साथ भी जीने दो.

माना की कुदरत की गलती से सामाजिक दौड़ गये ये हार,
पर खुद मे है वो बहुत ख़ास.
तानो के नहीं है ये हक़दार,
ये मांगते है प्यार...हाँ, सिर्फ प्यार.
हो सके तो इनका मजाक उड़ाने के बजाये,
इनसे 'जीने का जज्बा' ले लीजिये उधार.

Unity in Diversity

2010-08-15T02:13:00.000-07:00

You

are

my

best

friend.

Followers

of

different

religions,

We

brainwashed

each other

for

years.

Now you are 'me' and I am 'you'.

देश माँगे 'मुझे'

2010-08-15T02:03:00.000-07:00

मलीन बस्तियों के पास.....
दिन के उजाले को "रोशन" करती स्ट्रीट लाइट्स है चिढाती.

भूख से बिलखते बच्चो के बगल मे......
किसी नयी फ़ूड चेन के प्रमोशन मे लगी स्टाल मुँह बनाती.

दुकान पर काम करते किसी "छोटू" की बेबसी...
अक्सर मेरी खिल्ली उडाती.

दूर गाँव मे अभी भी किसी की चिठ्ठी न पहुँच पाती.....
और शहर मे किसी किशोर के मोबाइल पर डाउनलोडेड रिंगटोंस ताने मार कर जाती.

रोज़ कितने ही बेगारी मे मरते....
पर किसी फिल्मस्टार की बीमारी सबको फ़िक्र मे लाती.

मेरे देश को मेरी ज़रुरत है....
ये सब बातें शायद मुझे यही याद दिलाती.

अहमियत

2010-08-14T03:42:00.000-07:00

नन्हे शौकत ने अपने पहले रमजान को माना,
कुरान शरीफ की अहमियत को जाना,
था वो नन्ही सी जान,
पर उसके रोजो मे साफ़ झलकता था उसका ईमान.
अब्बू-अम्मी की था वो जान,
अप्पी और भाई को करता था हरदम परेशान.

शौकत की फ़िक्र मे किसी को नींद ना आती,
सबका चाहे जो हो पर नन्हे की सहरी कभी ना छूट पाती.
और तब तो मिलता सबको इफ्तार का अलग ही मज़ा,
जब शाम के वक़्त खुलता शौकत का रोज़ा.
अभी तो इसने ज़िन्दगी को शुरू भर किया,
फिर भी मज़हब को कई "बड़ो" से बेहतर समझ लिया.

एक रोज़ सब इंतज़ार मे थे की वो सब इफ्तार कर पायें,
जब अब्बू काम से घर लौटकर आये.
देर तक भी जब अब्बू की कोई खबर नहीं मिली,
आज शौकत भूखे पेट ही पढने चला गया तराबी.
अगले दिन तक उनकी कोई खबर न मिलने पर हर कोई बेचैन दिख रहा था,
इस घर का ये रोज़ा भी लम्बा खींच रहा था.

कुछ रोज़ तक कुछ पता ना चलने पर मायूसी का मंज़र फैला रहा,
जिद्दी शौकत का रोज़ा भी लम्बा खींचता गया.
इस नन्हे बंदे ने चुना अजब सा रास्ता,
खुदा को देने लगा खुदा का ही वास्ता.
जब इंतेहा की हद पार कर गया इंतज़ार,
दिया गया उनकी गुमशुदगी का इश्तेहार.
अखबारों को बताया गया शौकत के अब्बू का हुलिया और नाम,
साथ ही बताया गया उनके बारे मे पुख्ता खबर देने वाले को 20,047 रुपयों का इनाम.

"20,000 तो ठीक है, ये 47 रुपये अलग से क्यों जोड़ दिए?"

"ये 47 रुपये बाकी 20,000 से ज्यादा अहम है...साहब,
जो शौकत ने अपने अब्बू के लिए अपनी गुल्लक तोड़ कर है दिये!!"

The Art of Bargaining

2010-08-14T03:28:00.000-07:00

Mickey Bond is a worker in South African embassy in India. He loves India and its diverse culture. He is a happy man but with one big problem. He can’t handle too much pressure. Mickey's behavior in tense situations is inscrutable. Otherwise, he is okay. His cousin, Aladin Bond is on a World tour and staying with Mickey to visit India. Mickey tells Aladin about popular street markets of India where according to him "Bargaining" is the key.

Mickey Bond - Bargaining is a very important, and even expected, part of shopping at markets in India. Shopkeepers in India hope to charge you a higher rate to raise their monthly income. You want to save money as your budget is running low. But the streets are filled with colorful and enticing items to buy so how do you buy something without getting ripped off? The idea is to start below what you are willing to pay.

Mickey takes Aladin to weekly Monday Market in his locality.

Mickey Bond (With James Bond expressions) – Let me show you how it’s done.

Mickey walks to a wooden stall.

Mickey – This green shirt with embroidery. How Much?

Shopkeeper – Four Hundred Rupees.

Mickey – No, it’s too much. I can pay you Forty Rupees for this.

Mickey thought the Shopkeeper will offer the shirt at lower price but Shopkeeper was an enthusiastic young man, new in business.

Shopkeeper – No, Sahib! Four Hundred Rupees.

Mickey – No, Forty! Look..my name is Bond....Mickey Bond!

Shopkeeper – I am Popeye the Spider man! Four Hundred.

Mickey (Returning to 'original Mickey look' from James Bond expressions) – Forty!

Shopkeeper – Four Hundred!

Mickey – Forty!

Shopkeeper – Four Hundred!

This Four Hundred versus Forty went on for few more seconds and Mickey Bond was 'pressurized' enough to shout......

Mickey – AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! Okay, final! Four Hundred Forty?

The End!

Since many of you are reading this page to get some tips on Bargaining. :p Here's the best way to go about it to make sure you don't pay too much at India's markets. Though, gradually Department stores, Supermarkets, Shopping Malls, Hypermarkets, etc are replacing local unorganized, desi markets.

*) - To get a feel for how much goods should cost, visit some fixed price stores first.

*) - In street markets, as a general rule, don't pay more than half the initial asking price of any items. Sometimes it's possible to pay less, especially if you buy more than one item.

*) - Shop keepers consider the first sale of the day to be lucky, so shop early and they may give you a better price to get your business.

*) - Never reveal how much you're interested in an item. Always pretend to be indifferent as to how much you want it.

*) - Start the bargaining process by asking the shop keeper "Is this your best price?" or "Is a discount possible?".

*) - The price will immediately be dropped a small amount. Tell the shop keeper that the item is still way too expensive. You'll then be asked how much you're prepared to pay.

*) - When it's your turn to offer a price, make sure you start with a low amount that's well below what you're prepared to pay. Around one third of the quoted price is a good amount.

*) - If the shop keeper isn't dropping the price enough, walk away. Usually this will result in an immediate reduction in the asking price. If it doesn't, it's an indication that your price is too low. You can either go back and keep negotiating, or try and find the item cheaper somewhere else.

*) - It's a good idea to walk around the market and see all that's on offer first, before buying anything. It's common to find the same items for sale in a number of shops.

*) - Lastly, keep in mind that bargaining is meant to be fun. Many shop keepers enjoy it, as the interaction breaks up the monotony of their day.

वो 'दावा' नही था!

2010-08-13T03:59:00.000-07:00

कल था जुम्मा....और थी ईद,
पर साथियों के साथ अपने फ़र्ज़ मे मशगूल थे मिया खालिद.
वर्दी पहने कुछ बन्दों पर हो गए शायद फ़रिश्ते तक मुरीद,
फ़र्ज़ तो पूरा हुआ...पर एनकाउंटर मे अपराधियों के अलावा हो गए खालिद समेत कुछ पुलिसकर्मी शहीद.

जिंदगी को फ़र्ज़ के लिए कई दांव पर लगा देते है जैसे हो कोई जुआ,
उनके लिए लोग सुस्ताते से कहते है......"चलो एक पुलिसवाला कम हुआ."

इमानदारो की भी हो जाती है नब्ज़ सुस्त,
जब मानवाधिकार, विपक्ष आदि के ज़ोर से अक्सर पुलिस एनकाउंटर पर जांच कमेटीयां होती है नियुक्त.

तब तो फूट ही पड़ा उनकी बीवी के आक्रोश का लावा,
जब अगले दिन अख़बार मे ख़बर छपी....."पुलिस द्वारा एनकाउंटर करने का एक और 'दावा'.

समाप्त!!!!!

किसी वर्ग, समूह, समाज, महकमे, आदि का generalization यानी उस से जुड़े लोगो के बारे मे उन्हें जाने बिना ग़लत धारणाएं बनाना बहुत ग़लत बात है. पर ऐसी बातें अक्सर देखने, सुनने, को मिल जाती है. हर व्यक्ति मे हर गुण और बात दूसरे से अलग होती है तो फिर उसे जाने बिना उस पर सुनी सुनाई राय बनाना कैसे सही हो सकता है? कई विषयों पर हम जो सोचते है वो हमारी सोच नही बल्कि मीडिया, पढ़ाई, पुरखो....आदि की हम पर थोपी गई सोच होती है. जैसे पुलिस का महकमा.....एक 5-6 साल का बच्चा, जिसको सड़क पार करने मे भी मदद की ज़रुरत हो वो तक पुलिस की बुराई पर निबंध लिख सकता है. पुलिस तो समाज का हिस्सा है.....जैसा समाज उसे बनाएगा वैसी वो बन जायेगी.....ऐसा ही बाकी महकमों और लोगो के साथ होता है. इसी विषय पर यह कविता लिखी है.

वो खुश है!

2010-08-13T01:56:00.001-07:00

Story of an unskilled worker from India whose family is struggling for basic necessities. To raise their standard of living he migrates to foreign country and is exploited. He gets very less money but even the less 'foreign money' is valuable enough when converted to Indian Rupee. So, he "happily" suffers........

वो खुश है! -

मिटाने परिवार की मजबूरी,
निकला वो परदेस करने मजदूरी.
परदेस सपनो से उलट निकला,
मालिको से उसे जानवरों सा बर्ताव मिला.
घिसट-घिसट के बना वो बंधवा,
पर तसल्ली थी....
की घिसटने से मिले परदेसी सिक्को से खूब बनता था देसी रुपया.
और इसलिए वो खुश था....
हाँ, शायद वो खुश था.

"चिट्ठी लिखने का वक़्त कहाँ मिलता,
यहाँ खूब काम करना जो पड़ता,
जब टेलीफोन की लाइन अपने गाँव तक खींच जाएगी,
तब ढंग से अपने दिल की डोर बंध पाएगी.

काम के बोझ ने बना दिया है बैल कोल्हू,
सब कहते है धीरे-धीरे सीख जाऊंगा....अभी नया जो हूँ.

पैसे भेजे है उनको संगवा लेना,
सब रुके काम पूरे करवा देना.
छोटू दोबारा स्कूल जाएगा,
पिता जी का चश्मा भी इस महीने आएगा.

घर की छत बनवा लेना,
और उस लालची प्रधान के पैसे चुकता देना.
अभी कुछ और साल घर नहीं आ पाऊंगा,
पर मेहनत करके हम सबके लिए खूब पैसा कमाऊंगा.

परदेस मे हर सुविधा है मिल जाती,
खाने-पानी से लेकर बिजली हर वक़्त है आती.

एक चीज़ और है जो हर वक़्त है आती.....
.....घर की याद...जो बहुत सताती.

हमारी ख़ुशी के लिए ये दूरियां सहनी पड़े तो बिना शिकन सहूँ,
घर ना सही...घर की याद ही संजोकर रहूँ...और...
....और मै खुश हूँ,
हाँ, मै बहुत खुश हूँ.

"Komodo Dragon Walk is sexier than Cat Walk!"

2010-08-12T00:50:00.000-07:00

Place : Yangon (Rangoon), Burma.

Occasion : A regional Beauty Pageant.

Final Round.

Judge – What is more sensual....sexier than a Cat Walk?

Contestant (A Biotechnology Undergraduate Student)– Sir, Definitely a "Komodo Dragon Walk" moving his/her/it’s bottom 75 Degrees both sides. That’s 45 Degrees more than a standard Cat Walk. Salamanders are also very close..losing the 'bottom twist battle' just by few degrees.

Judge - Good, you are selected.....

Contestant - Wow! I knew how to impress anyone...you know as they always say beauty with brains.

Judge - .....for the United Nations Zoological Data Collection, Analysis and Research Program.....and the regional branch of United Nations is 4.7 kilometers that's 4700 meters from here. Best of Luck and Bye!

The End!

Author notes -

The sexy-est walk on this planet for me.

Komodo Dragons - Animal X Classic Series 1 -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4B528xdGSI

Walking with Komodo Dragons (After 45 Seconds) -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxxAobrnYQw&feature=related

कोई नहीं आया!!

2010-08-12T00:31:00.000-07:00

बेटी अपने परिवार मे ऐसी रम गयी,
अपने "पापा जी" की खैर-खबर लेने की उसे सुध ना रही.
बेटे की नौकरी विदेश मे लगी,
वहीँ उसने अपनी गृहस्ती बसा ली.

माँ को पहले ही काल आया,
पर उनका कोई बच्चा ना आया.

पिता को हुई लम्बी बीमारी,
बूढे शरीर को खुद ही करनी पड़ी सालो तक अपनी तीमारदारी,
पर ना कभी उनका उनका बेटा आया और ना बेटी.

कमर गयी झुक,
पेंशन गयी रुक,
खिड़की से अक्सर बाहर निहारते,
दूसरो की ख़ुशी मे.....अपने गम बिसारते.

भावनाएं टूटने लगी बनके कहर,
ज़िन्दगी लगने लगी ज़हर,
काटने को दौड़ता खाली-खाली सा घर.
वो वीरान राह पर दर्द छलकाने यूँ ही चल पड़े.......
कुछ देर बाद सड़क दुर्घटना मे वो हमेशा के लिए चल बसे......

अधेड़ की शत-विक्षत लाश की कोई पहचान नहीं कर पाया,
लावारिस लाश को आखिर अंजानो ने जलाया.

.....पर उनका कोई अपना नहीं आया.

मुझे घर जाने से लगता डर!

2010-08-11T02:30:00.000-07:00

बेरोज़गारी हमारे समाज की विकट समस्याओं मे से एक है. शिक्षा के मूलभूत ढांचे मे कमी, बढती जनसँख्या, कमज़ोर सरकारी तंत्र....वजह तो बहुत है पर इनके सीधे से समाधानों पर कभी अमल नहीं हुआ. मैंने पोस्ट-ग्रेजुएट लोगो को मजबूरी मे चपरासी की नौकरी करते देखा है. ये कविता एक ऐसे युवक की है जो काफी समय से नौकरी की तलाश मे है. आज भी साक्षात्कार के बाद उसे नौकरी के लिए नहीं चुना गया और......

मुझे घर जाने से लगता डर,
थोडा सा ही सही ज़हर दे दो.

बाबा की काठी बूढी हुई...
वो दर्द छुपायें...खुश होकर.

माँ की आँखों मे सपने दिखें...
उन सपनो से बचता मै छुप-छुप कर.

मुझे घर जाने से लगता डर...

मेरे घर का किराया ज्यादा है...
चुकता है बहना की पढाई के दम पर.

दुनिया मुझ पर अब हँसती है,
मजबूरी भारी ज़िल्लत पर.

मरने की मेरी औकात नहीं...
जीता हूँ वायदों की कीमत पर.

मुझे घर जाने से लगता डर....

मदद

2010-08-10T02:01:00.001-07:00

"ओह, लगता है आगे बड़ा एक्सीडेंट हो गया है,
मदद को पुकार रहे है कुछ 'जिंदा',
हमे उनकी मदद करनी चाहिए."

"ए जी, आप गाडी आगे बढाइये..
एक्सीडेंट बड़ा है...
जो जिंदा है वो शायद नहीं बचेंगे,
ये भी पक्का नहीं की हॉस्पिटल वाले इन्हें भर्ती करेंगे,
उल्टा हम लोग पुलिस के चक्कर मे फसेंगे,
नयी गाडी है इसके इन्टीरीयरस भी गंदे होंगे,
ऊपर से पेट्रोल के खर्चे अलग होंगे."

"तुम सही कहती हो,
मुझ अकेले से इतना सब कैसे होगा?
ये तो हाईवे है....
इनकी मदद कोई और कर देगा..."

Just 'Hear' this! (Poem/Story)

2010-08-10T01:58:00.000-07:00

There was a Deer,
Whose ear sensed a Bear,
Deer froze with fear,
Bear came near.

Negotiated Deer,
"Dear Bear, I have Beer,
with which you can cheer."

Bear changed his mind's gear,
Bear drank beer.
and also tried to tear the deer,
Escaped Deer,
By reminding Bear,
That Bear forgot to wear his underwear.

मेरी आँखें, तेरे सपने

2010-08-10T01:52:00.000-07:00

"राम, बुलंदशहर पुलिस एथलीट मीट जीत गया!!!"

राम बस नहीं था उनके घर के सदस्य का नाम,
वो तो था पूरे गाँव की शान.
इसमे थे परिवार के कई बलिदान,
सबने मिल कर चुकाया था "इस" राम का दाम.

पर अभी और संघर्ष देखने थे बाकी,
पिता पर बढ़ता जा रहा था काम का बोझ काफी.
पर उनकी आँखों मे तब थकान ना दिखती,
जब गाँव मे राम के चर्चे और खबरे होती.

अंतिम वक़्त तक उन्होंने अपने बेटे के सपनो को अपनी आँखों से जिया,
इरादा तो पक्का था पर बूढे शरीर ने धोखा दे दिया.

मृत आँखों मे भी बेटे की सफलता देखने की व्याकुलता साफ़ दिखती,
यूँ बेवक्त अपनी हार की झुंझलाहट से जैसे बंद थी उनकी मुट्ठी.

बिलखते बेटे ने जब पार्थिव शरीर को आग से जलाया,
तब शहर से उसका दोस्त ये खबर लाया.........

"राम, तू नेशनल कैंप के लिए सेलेक्ट हो गया."

India = (USA + Africa)/2

2010-08-10T01:41:00.001-07:00

India, fully equipped with the features of both advanced and backward countries in every sphere of life from Standard of living to Sanitation.

One moment you encounter fully maintained posh colonies, Malls, Industries, etc and within few yards there are slums, "mountains" of garbage, etc. Development is scattered and not properly distributed.

India is not great but still not that bad. With development, growth and commercialization increasing at remarkable pace lets hope that India will be a developed nation in couple of decades.

Examples of This mixture,

#) - India is neither capitalist economy nor socialist economy, it's a mixed economy.

#) - Not a developed country...not a underdeveloped country...it's a Developing country.

#) - The Human Development Index rates India in 'Medium' countries. Recently, ranked 128 out of about 200 countries.

#) - Even the general complexion of Indians is, (White + Black)/2.

#) - The policies, International Trade, GDP, National Income, Per Capita Income, Sports, Growth Rate.....everything is average...medium.

When I 'Met' Miss Universe!!

2010-08-10T01:28:00.001-07:00

True! When I was 5-6 years old I 'met' the then (1994) Miss Universe Sushmita Sen.

She was on a visit to Taj Mahal, Agra. My father was in her regional security team and he took us (Mom, Brother, Sister and me) to Taj Mahal...so that we can see the Miss Universe. My teenage Brother and Sister were very excited. I was annoyed that why are they going crazy. They somehow explained me that Miss Universe is a very big personality, now I know. :) Our camera was not working...so we purchased an Autograph Booklet....we went to Taj and soon she arrived with security guards, Police and some 'fashion' people around her. She was not visible in first few minutes but later she roamed in the gardens looking at Taj and we were looking at her....my mother said that "She is good but few of our young female relatives were far 'better' than her. "

My Bro and Sis froze. Mommy gave them the Autograph Book but they were afraid of the security around her. Papa was outside the gate. Weather was hot and humid and after few minutes she almost fainted. The fashion people took her to a room near the gate....earlier they use to sell postcards, etc stuff on the entrance gate (I mean the final entrance from where one can see the Taj). I followed them with my Autograph book but was too timid to enter the room...so I stood there with a puzzled face. Hoping that someone notice my transparent and innocent face...my super timid sis and bro were signaling and hooting. Then an old foreigner lady....who was in the small crowd of 15-20 people (watching Sush) came to me....probably she saw my silent struggle...I guess she asked "You want her Autograph?" I was zero in English then but I heard the word 'Autograph' in her sentence and said "Yes"....she went upstairs in that room (nobody stopped her cause she was a harmless old foreigner, good old 1990s days security was 'actually' needed for very few people in India) and after some time the lady came back. She gave me the autograph book, 4 pages filled with "Love Sushmita".....she kissed my forehead and vanished into the crowd. I was happy because I got autographs and everybody was looking at me.

Thanks to Sushmita and Thanks and Love to that kind lady!

Stunt

2010-08-10T01:23:00.000-07:00

Ek mahatvkanshi film project jo aaj tak ki sabse zyada stunts waali film banne jaa rahi thi jiske baare mey har jagah characha abhi se tez ho gayi thi. Uss film ki kahani ek laalchi builder ki thi jiski nazar ek poore gaon ki zameen par thi aur jisse hathiyaane kay liye wo kuch bhi karne ko tayyar tha…..gaon waalo ki jaan bhi lena uske liye khel tha par uska ek dardnaak annt hota hai.

Itne saare stunts aur production ka budget kum karne kay liye uss film kay producer nay ek door daraz kay peechde gaon ko chuna, jaha kay gaon waalo se usse shooting kay liye badi jagah aasani se bhi mil gayi aur film kay liye bahut hi kum paiso mey khatarnaak stunts bina ‘safety equipments’ kay saath karne ko bahut se bhole bhaale gaon waale raazi ho gaye.

Wo laachi Producer saare intezaam se santusht hokar apne production house ka kaam sambhalne waapas Mumbai chala jaata hai. Wo iss film ki beech beech mey khabar lene laga.Ussi Producer kay nirdesho kay anusaar film unit dwara bina safety measures kay gaon waalo se bahut se khatarnaak stunts karvaye gaye jisme kai gaon waalo maare gaye ya ghayal ho gaye. Film ki kaafi shooting abhi baaki thi aur inn durghatnaao kay kaaran film unit par sthaniye logo aur police ka dabaav badh raha tha.

Gaon waalo ka gussa dekh film unit producer ko salah deti hai ki wo Mumbai se hi gaon waalo ko film ki kamaai ka 99% hissa dene ka kagazi vaada kar lijiye. Baad mey unhe thoda bahut muaawza dekar iss 99% profit baantne waale papers ko farzi saabit karva denge….(”Ye bevkoof gaon waale hum logo se case ladne aa jaayein wo hi bahut hoga….usse jeetna to door ki baat hai.”) Producer ye baat maankar gaon mey wo legal papers bhijwa deta hai jinme likha hota hai ki iss film se honay waali kamaai ka 99% hissa gaon waalo ko diya jaayega. 1% profit bhi film ki unit ka kharcha poora karne kay liye liya jaa raha hai. Iss film se gaon ko bahut badi aarthik madad milegi aur faayda hoga. Aisa karne se gaon waalo aur police ka dabaav phir se kum ho jaata hai. Kuch dino baad, Film ki unit ab producer se phone par ajeeb tarah se baatein karne lagi thi. Producer ko laga ki wo sabhi gaon mey itne zyada din rehne kay kaaran irritate ho gaye honge. Kuch hi dino mey film kay director ka Producer ko phone aata hai ki film ka aakhri schedule shoot hona hai jiska udghatan film ki poori unit aur gaon waale aapki upastithi mey aapke haatho se hi chahte hai. Waha pahunchkar sabhi ka bartaav usse atpatta sa lagta hai. Sabhi aakhri scene ki shooting turant chahte thay.

Aakhri scene ek bridge par shoot hona tha producer jaise hi ribbon kaat ta hai. Ek daravni hassi kay saath director bhoot mey badal jaata hai aur bolta hai. “Lights……camera……action.” Ye sunte hi ab tak uss film mey kai stunts kay dauraan maare gaye gaon waalo kay shat vikshat shav achanak se prakat ho kar uss producer ki taraf badhte hai…..darr se kaamp raha producer madad kay liye film Unit kay logo ki taraf daudta hai par wo bhi bhooto mey badal chuke hotay hai. Tab uss producer ko film ka bhoot director batata hai ki marre huey gaon waalo ki aatmao nay poori film unit ko bhi maar daala tha.....aur issi kaaran unka bartaav ajeeb ho gaya tha. Producer ki dardnaak maut kay saath hi film ka aakhri schedule poora hota hai. Uss film kay prints apne aap hi unn legal papers ki copy kay saath desh bhar kay distributors kay paas pahunch jaatein hai. Film superhit hoti hai aur marre aur ghayal gaonwaalo kay parijano ko unka haq milta hai.

The End.

बड़ी देर हो गयी!

2010-08-10T01:20:00.000-07:00

There is a college going girl Sonia....jo public transport se college jaati hai. Uske college jaate waqt aksar ek ladka Ravi apne dosto kay saath mil kar usse chhedta hai. Kai weeks tak Ravi aur uske dosto dwara teasing ka ye silsila jaari rehta hai. Sonia ab Ravi ki harkato se tanng aa chuki thi par wo sab kuch chup-chap seh rahi thi. Sonia akeli ladki nahi thi jo awara Ravi aur uske gang ki nazro mey thi...balki aksar uske jaisi kuch ladkiyon ko pareshaan karna unke liye manoranjan ka saadhan tha.

Kabhi koi ladki Ravi ki harkaton ka virodh kar deti to usko 2-4 thappad maarne kay baad hi Ravi ko santushti milti thi. Uski boli mey virodh karne waali ladkiyon ki pitaai karna "Par-Katiyon ko sabak sikhana" hota tha.

Tabhi ek din Ravi ki behan Rashmi aatmhatya kar leti hai....usne apni suicide ki wajah apne college kay ek ladke Tarun ko bataya tha jo college, raaste mey ....phone se aksar Rashmi ko pareshaan karta tha. Gussey se bhara Ravi apne dosto ko saath lekar kisi tarah Tarun kay ghar ka pata karta hai aur wo uske ghar ka darwaza peet ta hai.....

....Darwaza ghabrai hui Sonia kholti hai jisse Ravi roz chhedta tha. Darasal Sonia Tarun ki behan thi.

......avaak Ravi wahin zameen par baith apna sar pakad kar ronay lagta hai.

The End.

झूठी शान

2010-08-10T01:02:00.000-07:00

ये होती है शान,
वैसे तो जेब से अंटी नहीं निकलती,
कहने को दे दें दूसरो के लिए अपनी जान.

बाकियों का वक़्त चाहे बेवक्त खा लें,
अपने समय के हर 'इंच' का रखते है ध्यान.

इनसे जुडी हर चीज़ का होना चाहिए मान,
चाहे दूसरो पर पीक दें ये ढाई मन पान.

इनके नुक्कड़ की पांचवी गली बड़ी है....
बाकी क्या काशी, क्या सांसाराम....

चलिए कोई नहीं...अब तक ये सब किया,
आगे कौन सुधरने की उम्मीद करेगा.

आप जैसे तो कई है,
भीड़ मे आप पर कोई ऊँगली नहीं करेगा.

- समाप्त!!!!

लखनऊ मे मैंने एक शब्द सीखा है "भोकाल"..बाकी जगह शायद इसके दूसरे पर्यायवाची चलते होंगे. कहने का मतलब ये है की मैंने ऐसे कई छुटभइये नेता देखे है जो 4-5 लोगो को जमा करके, सार्वजनिक स्थानों पर जानबूझ कर आवाज़ ऊँची करके सोचते है की दुनिया उनके कदमो मे आ गयी...जबकि दुनिया इतनी बड़ी है की...हुंह!! :)

Mautniti

2010-08-10T00:51:00.000-07:00

Kuch mahino pehle hi Sindhar Rajya mey Jaago Dal naam ki party satta mey aayi thi. Uss party ka satta mey aana ek chmatkaar tha kyoki bahut si chhoti parties se gatbandhan karke pehli baar koi sadharan starr ki party satta mey aayi thi.

Lekin aaye din Jaago Dal aur uske sahiyogi dalo kay netao kay naam ghotaalo mey aa rahe thay. Kuch hi mahino kay antraal mey ruling party ki lokpriyeta behadd kum ho gayi thi aur aaye din sansad mey vikpakshi netao dwara kharab policies ki ninda, reporters dwara sting operations, etc, se sattadhari party kay neta pareshaan thay.
Upar se Sindhar ki rajdhani Dhar aur uske aas paas kay elako mey dangey bhadak gaye thay. Sthiti nazuk hoti jaa rahi thi.

Ruling Party ki meeting hui jisme sabhi ko zaroori nirdesh diye gaye. Meeting kay baad Cheif Minister Mahendra Madugar nay kuch netao ko rook liya. Phir Chief Minister nay apni baat shuru ki.

Mahendra Madugar - Kuch hi mahino mey humare bahut se mantriyon par ghotaalo kay maamle darj ho gaye hai. Upar se humari kai policies ki central agencies dwara jaanch chal rahi hai. Media nay bhi jeena haraam kar rakha hai. Ye unki reports aur khabro ka hi natija hai ki janta ab humse nafrat karne lagi hai. Yaani iss baat kay poore aasaar hai ki humari sarkar agle election se bahut pehle hi girne waali hai. Dango ko bhadkane mey karyakartao kay roop mey mere aadmiyon ka haath tha taaki mai vipakshi parties ki image bigaad sakun par patrakaaro aur deshbhakt netao ki wajah se ulta hi ho gaya. Inn Dango nay humari chhavi aur zyada bigaad di hai.....lekin hum inn dango ka ab bhi apne faayde kay liye isteymaal kar sakte hai. Kuch reporters ki boli bahut nikalti hai aur wo yahin humari naak kay neeche issi shehar mey reh kar kaam karte hai. Aur opposition kay kuch mantri jo humare khilaaf janta ko bhadka rahe hai aur bade campaign chala rahe hai.....inn sab ko dango ki aad lekar khatm karna hoga.

Ek sawal uttha.

"Par Mukhya Mantri ji aisa karne se to seedha shaq hum par jaayega."

Mahendra Madugar - Isliye to maine Jaago dal kay khaas mantriyon ko meeting kay baad rooka hai. Humey apne aur apne sahiyogi dalo kay bhi kuch netao ko maarna padega tab kisi ko iss yojna ki bhanak nahi lagegi. Arre, bhaiyon....Sarkar ko aage chalana hai to humey aise balidaan to dene padenge. Ab dhyaan se suno jin mantriyon aur reporters ko maarna hai maine sabki list bana li hai. Inme se zyadatar V.I.P. aur celebrity ka darja haasil kar chuke hai isliye kisi ko gayab nahi kar sakte sabki laashein milni chahiye. Inn sabko aise marvaao jaise ye dango mey marre hon aur phir inhe dango mey marre logo kay saath plant karva do.Matlab maarne kay baad inke shareer kay kuch anng bhang kar dena ya bade bade ghaav kar dena. Inki Post Mortem reports dango mey marr chuke logo jaisi lagni chahiye......nahi....balki mai to kehta hun ki unse bhi asli lagni chahiye...ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Wahan upasthit sabhi haiwaano kay thhahake goonjne lage. Mahendra Madugar kay shadiyantra par amal hua aur berehmi kay saath unke aadmiyon nay di gayi list kay anusaar bahut se mantriyon aur reporters ko dango ki aad mey maar daala. Ussi shaam Ruling Party kay unn sabhi jallado ka Chief Minister kay ghar par jhashn chal raha tha. Sabhi iss kaamyabi ki wajah se saatve aasmaan par thay.

Kuch dair baad darwaze par zor ki dastak hoti hai. Bahar bahut shor gul tha. Sabhi neta ghabra gaye aur unhone apni security ko kai sandesh bheje lekin koi jawab nahi mila. Saare mantriyon nay apna staff aur suraksha karmi iss party ki wajah se pehle hi kum kar diye thay.....par unke khaas bache huey suraksha karmi bhi ab unka jawab nahi de rahe thay. Khidkiyon kay sheshay tootne lage aur bahar shor badhta jaa raha tha.

Mahendra samet andar maujood darre huey netao nay khud ko upar waale kamre mey bandh kar liya aur wahan se bahar dekha to Dange ka drashya tha unke suraksha karmi behosh pade thay.....bahut se gutt aapas mey bhide huey thay. Chief Minister ki saari suraksha vyavastha gayab thi. Aakroshit bheed nay darwaza todd diya aur wo andar ghus aayi. Phir jis kamre mey sabhi netao nay khud ko bandh kar liya tha uska darwaza bhi todd diya gaya. Aakhri ummeed kay saath sabhi neta kamre ka darwaza khulte hi tabadtood goliyan chalate huey bachne kay liye neeche bhaage par unhone dekha ki neeche bhi bahut log hai aur jin logo ko unhone goliyan maari thi wo bhi unki taraf hastey huey badh rahe hai.

Ab achanak saari bheed shat viskshat laashon mey badal gayi thi. Uss bheed mey se bahar aaye unn Reporters aur Netao ki chalti phirti laashein jinhe Mahendra Madugar aur uske saathi mantriyon nay marvaya tha. Ye manzar dekh kar Mahendra aur uske saathi darr se jadd ho jaate hai. Har neta aur patrakaar ki laash kay haath mey ek kaagaz tha. Wo kaagazo ko unn darre sehme Ruling Party kay netao ko thama dete hai. Wo 'zinda' neta unn kaagazo ko dekhte hai......wo kaagaz unhi ki post mortem reports thi. Phir wo laashein unn netao ko unki pehle se hi bani post mortem reports kay anusaar maar dete hai.

Kuch dair baad sandeh kay aadhar par pahunchi Police ko wahan Sattadhari party kay Mukhya Mantri Mahendra Madugar samet unke kuch mantriyon ki kuchli, kati, shat vikshat laashein milti hai....jaise wo dango mey maare gaye ho aur har laash kay upar uski post mortem report rakhi hui thi.

The End!!

Deadly Deal

2010-08-10T00:39:00.000-07:00

Mr. Karan Verma ek sarkari karmchari thay unki naukri kay ab kuch hi saal reh gaye thay. Unki patni ek grahni thi aur unke 2 ladke aur 1 ladki thi(Dilip,Rohan aur Akansha).Unki aarthik sthiti samanya thi,unkey teeno bachche jawaan ho chuke thay par unka chhota beta,Rohan maansik roop se kamzoor tha.Unki aarthik sthiti par unka chhota beta bhojh bana hua tha aur bachpan se ab tak usse gharwaalo ki dutkaar hi mili thi. Phir bhi wo sabhi ko apna maankar unse baatein karne ki naakaam kosishein karta rehta.Din kat rahe thay ki tabhi Mr. Karan ka Heart Fail ho gaya aur unhe Hospital mey bharti karvaya gaya. Mr. Karan pehle hi apni jawaan beti ki shaadi aur ghar ki sthiti ko lekar chintit thay aur ab unka Heart Failure honay se jaise poore ghar par pahaad toot pada. Doctors nay Heart Transplant ki baat kahi aur jiske liye Verma parivaar ko jald hi lakho rupaye jutane ko kaha gaya.Itni jaldi itna saara paisa jutana parivaar mey kisi kay bas ki baat nahi thi aur Heart Transplant kay liye Mr. Karan kay matching blood group ka dil dhoondna bhi mushkil lag raha tha.

Sabhi gharwaalo nay Rohan ko maarkar Mr. Karan kay Heart Transplant kay liye uska dil isteymaal karne ka shadiyantra racha.Rohan ko sotay huey ak kamre mey bandh kar diya gaya aur uss kamre mey angithi jala di gayi,Rohan bahut dair tak chillata raha usse apno par vishvaas tha par uske apne aaj uske vishvaas kay saath saath usse bhi maar rahe thay.Jald hi kamre mey gaadha dhuaa aur Carbon Mono Oxide jaisi jehrili gases bhar gayi aur dum ghutne se tadapte Rohan nay dum todd diya. Sabhi gharwaalo nay jald hi iss haadse ka naatak duniya kay saamne kiya aur ghar kay mukhiya ki haalat ki dhuhaai dekar Rohan ka dil Mr. Karan mey transplant karne ki guzarish ki jo turant hi maan li gayi aur Rohan ki maut kay kuch hi ghanto baad uska dil uske pita mey transplant ho raha tha.Mr. Karan ko Rohan ki maut kay baare mey sabhi gharwaalo nay
sach-sach bata diya par Mr. Karan to apne parivaar sey bhi do kadam aage nikle aur operation kay baad Ardh-behoshi ki haalat mey hi sabhi ko unke kaam ki shabashi di aur Rohan kay doosre anngo ko baichne kay sujhaav bhi de daala. Rohan kay lagbhag sabhi aantrik anng jo bik saktey thay uske besharm parivaar waalo nay jaldi hi gair kanooni tareke sey thikaane laga diye. Ab Verma pariaar kay paas lakho rupaye aa chuke thay jinse naa sirf Karan Verma kay Heart Transplant kay operation ka kharcha chuka diya gaya balki ab unki aarthik sthiti bhi sudhar chuki thi.
Unn sabhi nay uss paise kay ak bahut bade hissey se ak shaandaar Car khareedi. Mr. Karan Verma abhi poori tarah se recover nahi huey thay isliye kuch dino tak unhe hospital mey hi guzarne thay.

Mr. Karan ko chhodkar sabhi nayi Car ki pehli sair par nikle........thodi dair baad unki Car aniyantrit hokar ak sunsaan sthaan kay andhiare kinare par ruk gayi.Car kay darwaze nahi khul rahe thay aur uska Air Conditioner kharab engine ka uddta dhuaa andar kheench raha tha.Sabhi ka dum ghut raha tha aur unki haalat bigad rahi thi par unki haalat ko dekhne waala waha koi nahi tha.Tabhi sabko Car mey apne saath ak chauthi aakriti bhi tadapti hui nazar aayi.......uss aakriti par Dilip nay Torch ki roshni maari......wo Rohan tha.......ya yu kahein ki Rohan ki aatma ya bhoot tha.Sabhi parivaar waalo ki Rohan ki tarah hi dum ghutne se maut ho gayi.....lekin Rohan nay aakhri waqt mey unka saath nahi chhoda.

Idhar Mr. Karan Verma hospital mey ajeeb harkate kar rahe thay aisa lag raha tha jaise wo pagal ho gaye ho.Har guzarte ghantey kay saath Unki haalat bigadti jaa rahi thi aur kuch hi ghanto mey to wo kisi Maansik roop se kamzoor vyakti ki tarah harkate kar rahe thay.Doctors nay jaanch ki aur Karan Verma kay iss bartaav ki wagah batayi haal hi mey unke shareer mey transplant huey dil ki jiske aniyamit karya kay kaaran Mr. Karan Verma kay dimaag kay kai hisso par khoon kay thhakey jam gaye thay aur unke kai anng bhi asamanya karya kar rahe thay.

Rohan ki aatma nay apna pratishood le liya tha.....lekin usne unn logo ko chhod diya jinhone uske anng khareede thay.

The End.

Death 'In-Corporated' (Part 2)

2010-08-10T00:33:00.000-07:00

Shehar kay kuch naami contractors aur sarkari adhikari bhi maare gaye thay.(Jinhone Zest Industries ki jagah uski rival company Den Industries kikisi naa kisi roop mey madad ki thi.)

Shehar mey ho rahi inn hatyaon ka rahasya ulajhta jaa raha tha. Pehle se hi pareshaan Ranjan Kumar kay betey Anuj se Police shaq kay aadhar par pooch taach kar rahi thi.

Lekin maut ka khel to tab bhi badastoor jaari tha.

Place - Den Industries.

"Congratulations Mister Manish, aapne to Den Industries kay recruitment cell ki surat hi badal kar rakh di. Kitne efficient employees chun rahe hai aap. Aur dekhiye 1 saal mey hi promotion, presonal cabin, car, etc, etc, etc....."

Manish - Thankyou, Mister Lalwant, par aapka appointment to 30 minutes baad ka hai.

"Appointment to aapka hai.....maut kay saath."

Manish - Excuse me, ye kya mazaak hai.

"Arre, ye mazaak nahi hai.....achchha dekhiye mujhe...mai kya koi mazaak karne waala lagta hun."

Manish ka achchha record uski maut ban gaya tha.

Den Industries kay office kay bahar.

"Beta...zara sunna kahan jaa rahe ho ?"

"Den Industries mey job kay liye apply karne."

"Ye Company achchhi nahi hai, baaki jagah kosish karo."

"Lekin mai yahan bhi apply karna chahta hun."

"Meri baat suno bado ki baat aise nahi kaat te...tumhara academic record achchha hai....Zest mey jaakar try karo....yahan to mujh jaise log rehte hai.....dekho mujhe."

Uss surat ko dekh kar buri tarah darra hua wo yuvak apne sabhi documents chhod kar wahan se bhaag khada hua.

Den Industries ko unnchi quality kay raw materials dene waale sabhi suppliers bhi maare gaye.

Anuj ko Police nay chhod diya aur pareshaani se ghira Anuj waapas ghar lautne laga. Lekin shayad uske pita nay uski pareshaani ko hamesha kay liye khatm karne ka mann bana liya tha. Den Industries kay head Shri Sunil Daam apni official meeting kay liye jaa rahe thay.

Sunil Daam - Driver, Hotel Rasher le chalo.

Driver- 1 Company pehle aayi, uske maalik nay khoob mehnat se sab jutaya...lekin doosri Company aayi aur uske maalik nay business ethics ka khayal nahi rakha. Kyu Daam...tum to bade ghatiya 'daam' kay insaan nikle.

Sunil Daam - Ranjan ?

"Wah, tum to bahut chalak nikle itni jaldi pehchan liya......ab jaldi marro....mai apne betey ko aur zyada pareshaan nahi dekh sakta."

Driver ki seat khaali ho gayi aur Sunil Daam ki gaadi bina driver kay aniyantrit ek doosri gaadi se jaa takrayi. Dono gaadiyon ki takkar se bhayankar blast hua aur dono gaadiyon kay parkhachhe udd gaye.

Doosri Car mey Anuj baitha tha.

Iss haadse mey dono companies kay maliko kay marrne kay baad Den Industries aur Zest Industries bandh ho gayi aur apni company ki sthiti sudhaarne kay liye Ranjan Kumar ki aatma ka khooni khel bandh hua.

The End!!

Death 'In-Corporated' (Part 1)

2010-08-10T00:10:00.000-07:00

"Mr. Anuj, I am sorry.......he is dead."

Shri Ranjan Kumar, 'Zest Industries' kay maalik apne shetra kay naami business tycoons mey gine jaate thay par peechle kuch samay se unko business mey bahut nuksaan jhelna pada tha. Mukhya Production units ka bandh hona, company shares mey bhaari giravat, resonable quotations kay bawajood bhi contracts aur tenders ka haath se nikal jaana.....aakhirkaar unka har din badhta ye stress unki aatmhatya ka kaaran ban gaya. Anuj Kumar unka eklauta beta tha jisko apne pita ka business aur ye chintayein virasat mey mili thi. Ye kayaas lagaye jaa rahe thay ki ghaate mey chal rahi Zest Industries jald hi bandh ho jaayegi.

Kuch dino baad.

Zest Industries kay head office kay sunsaan corridor mey.

"Madam Renu, aapse kuch baatein karni thi."

Renu - Mai ajnabiyon se iss tarah baat nahi karti.

"Lekin office mey to aap har waqt gossip karti rehti hai."

Renu - K..kaun hai aap?

"Tumhara Boss."

Kuch dair baad uss corridor mey Renu ki laash padi hui thi. Jiski vocal cord samet gardan kay andruni hisse bahar kheenche gaye lag rahe thay.

Office mey retail executive kay personal cabin mey.

"What nonsense....office stationary ka iss tarah personal use aur wastage nahi hona chahiye, Ramesh."

Ramesh - O Hello!! mister.....who are you.....aur aap andar kaise aa gaye ?

"O Hello mujhe nahi pehchana ? Mera naam Ranjan Kumar hai. Mai tumhara boss hua karta tha. Tumhe yakeen nahi ho raha hoga.....lo dekho mera chehra.....thoda sadd gaya hai par pehchan mey to aa raha hoga. Chalo ab iss stationary ka achchha isteymaal kiya jaaye."

Kuch hi seconds baad marre huey Ramesh ka shareer office stationary ka godaam nazar aa raha tha.

Sab kuch bahut jaldi ho raha tha aaj Zest Industries mey laasho ka dher lagne waala tha.

"Jamuna Das ji aap budhe ho gaye hai....ab aap kaam nahi karte bas attendance lagane aa jaate hai. Comapny kay puraane employee hai naa....sab aapki bahut izzat karte hai....mai bhi karta tha....par buddhape mey aapka dard aur mehnat mujhse dekhi nahi jaati. Arre kuch to kahiye....."

Jamuna Das ji kuch kehne se pehle hi adhik darr ki wajah se chal base thay.

Late Ranjan Kumar nay apni company kay saare inefficient employees aur workers ko kuch hi dair mey company se hamseha kay liye 'hata' diya tha.

Par silsila yahin nahi ruka.

Zest Industries se kuch kilometers ki doori par ek Bus Stop par.

"Bhaisahab, time kya hua hai ?"

"10:35."

"Bahut sardi hai....aaj to aap late ho gaye, Madan Babu. Aapke office ka time to 10 baje ka hai."

Madan - Haan, ye sab to adjust ho jaata hai. Waise maine aapko pehchana nahi.

"Mujhe Ranjan kehte hai. Mai aapki Company ka head tha."

Madan - What ?

"Arre, aapki Bus aa gayi....jaldi kariye."

Achanak Madan ko uss vyakti nay Bus kay aage dhakka de diya aur Madan ki Bus kay neeche aa jaane se maut ho gayi.

To be continued......

'Jehadi' Terrorist Interview

2010-08-09T00:55:00.000-07:00

"Hello."
"Al-Hello"

"What is your name?"
"Al-Pussa but my friends call me Al-Cunta."

"What are your aims?"
"To preserve environment and save energy."

"…Ahem! How?"
"By protecting oil reserves and resources from east…err… western countries…where is my left hand…this pose is right, challenging the western countries (and some European, Asian, African, Australian, countries and their research camps in Antarctica also) on my left hand side….err…right hand side."

"Sir, Photo Session is after the Interview. Why don’t you discuss and negotiate straight to ‘those’ governments?"
"Because we are not ‘Straight’."

"So, you all are happy and gay?"
"Of course, Al-yes."

"Your English is impressive….It is not your mother tongue….you learned English…from where?"
"English Movies."

"Your favourite English movie?"
"What’s in the name…they all are the same."

"Okay, your favourite dialogue?"
"O Yes…aaha..aaaaaaa…O yes…O my Gooo….aaaaaaaa fcuk me…ya ya ya."

"Hmmm, That’s good. So, what are...."
"By the way, one correction in the previous reply…It’s fuck not fcuk…the company may sue our organization. Edit this portion."

"Your favourite countries?"
"Afghanistan, Syria, North Korea, Iraq, Pakistan, and all the regions all over the world under Parallel Governments."

"Any part time job or hobby?"
"Preparation of scripts and giving ideas for the videos and material published of all the ‘Jehadi Organizations’ of this region. We have a big creative panel. I sometimes also manage set designing and kidnapping of people with different origins for the videos and photos."

"Your Country is Underdeveloped. You should participate in it’s development. Why are you…."
"Al-Shut up! Your country is over conscious about external affairs…people of your country are involved in many unethical practices...."

"Wow! You are so intelligent….who told you all this?"
"He he..Thanks…actually this was a part of "Budding Brigade Brainwash Program" to shut up the clever people we kidnap. I can speak a lot more on this..."

"Thank you for the Interview, Bye"
"Al-Bye-Bye...Wait a minute...what about the Photo Session?"

The End.

भूखा अन्नदाता

2010-08-09T00:50:00.000-07:00

दोस्तों, कुछ दिन पहले खबर आई की सरकार ने अपनी तरफ से किसानो का सारा कर्जा माफ़ कर दिया. पर अब भी किसानो की आर्थिक स्थिति ठीक नहीं. अनाधिकृत बाजारी व्यापार, कालाबाजारी, धरती की उर्वरक क्षमता मे कमी, etc, जैसे कारण किसानो के लिए अभिशाप बन गए है. सरकार भी उन पर कभी-कभी मेहरबान होती है....ऐसे मे हमे यह नहीं भूलना चाहिए की कृषि पर ही हमारा जीवन टिका है.

Place - Head Office, Apni Party, Balrampur.

"सर जी, इस गाँव बंथरा के हर घर मे 100-200 रुपये है बांटने,
अगर हम पंचो को अच्छी कीमत देंगे तो गाँव वाले लगेंगे हमारे तलवे चाटने."

Place - A Farmer Vishnu's hut, Banthra Village.

विष्णु - "सोनू, जा गैया चरा ला....कुछ काम नहीं करता,
मुनिया जा पंसारी से सौदा ले आ,
और तू सोनू की माँ...कुछ लकडियाँ बीन ला."

"घर मे अनाज का दाना तक नहीं, और तुम्हारी नशे की लथ जगी,
हम सबको घर से बाहर भेजना तो बहाना है...तुम्हे तो अपने यारो के साथ नशा जो चढाना है."

अपनों के तानो पर विष्णु ने ध्यान कहाँ दिया....उसको तो कोई और दुख था सता रहा.

ढूँढो रे ढूँढो मेरा भाग कहाँ है?
कर्जे मे डूबा मेरा सारा जहाँ है.
सूखे ये सूखे पत्ते कहते क्या है?
कितने बरस बीते बदरा कहाँ है?
बंजर ये धरती खुद को क्यों कहती माँ है?
बच्चे तड़प रहे...ममता कहाँ है?

हाय रे हाय मेरी किस्मत कहाँ है?
घर मे मेरी बिटिया जवां है.
जीवन ये मेरा कोई जंगल घना है,
कोई बताये मुझे राह कहाँ है?

दल-बल के साथ 'अपनी पार्टी' विष्ण के घर से अपना अभियान शुरू करने चली,
पर विष्णु के घर के बाहर उन्हें बिलखती भीड़.....
....और अन्दर एक मजबूर किसान की लाश लटकती मिली.

Fight for The Right!

2010-08-09T00:47:00.000-07:00

Daren - Papa...abhi mat jao....
John - (Daren ko apni godd mey utthakar)Mai waapas aaunga mere bachche.

Do padosi desh "Razed" aur "Prak" kay beech lambe arse se tanaav aur seema vivaad chal raha tha aur ab sthiti halke yuddh tak pahunch gayi thi.

Seema kay aas-paas dono desho ki senao me badhotri honay lagi.

Prak ka rajya ak Tanashah, Malsun kay haatho mey tha. Iss vivaad ko shaant karne kay liye videsh se ak shaanti dall aaya aur uske rakhe prastaavo aur baato se doono desho kay rukh mey kuch narmi nazar aane lagi. Dono desho ki senao ko ladaai rookne aur peeche hatne ka aadesh mila par Prak kay karta dharta Malsun kay dimaag mey kuch aur hi chal raha tha. Razed kay kai sainik ab laut chuke thay aur bachi hui asaavdhan Razed ki sena par Prak ka aakrman hua aur lagbhag sabhi bache huey Razed kay sainik maare gaye.

Prak nay iss sthiti ka faayda utthate huey Razed desh ka kaafi shetra apne kabze mey kar liya. Ladaai aur naa bhadke isliye Antarashrtriya Shaanti Committee nay faisla Prak kay haq mey sunaya. Kamzoor Razed desh bhi chhup ho gaya.Samay kay saath ye mamla thanda pad gaya. Iss chhal yuddh mey Razed kay shaheed huey ak sainik John ka Beta Daren ab javaan ho chuka tha aur wo bhi apne pita ki tarah sena mey bharti ho chuka tha.

Samay khud ko dohra raha tha aur lagbhag 25 saal baad phir se Park nay Asaavdhan aur peechli baato ko bhul rahe Razed par hamla kar diya tha. Razed aur Prak ki seemao par tanaav badh raha tha. Razed ki sthiti ab bhi kamzoor thi.Seema par ab Razed kay kuch hi sainik apni dharti ki raksha karne kay liye zinda bache thay jinme se ak Daren bhi tha.Ye bhi sanyoog tha ki kroor Mansul abhi bhi Prak ka shashak tha aur ussi kay aadesh se ye kayartapoorna hamla hua tha.

Daren - "Hello....This is "Slope" to "Delta base".....reading me.......humey backup ki zarurat hai......yaha halaat kharab hai.....aur "Nasties" aage badh rahe hai,Over."

"This is 'D-Base' to 'Slope' backup bhejey jaa rahien hai,Over."

Daren- "Slope to Delta Base......mujhe backup troops dikh rahe hai."

"D-Base to Slope, abhi to backup troops base se kuch hi doori par pahunche hai......itni jaldi waha kaise pahunch gaye. Are you sure that...."

Par aage baat ho paati iss se pehle hi Transmission mey baadha aa gayi.
Daren khush tha ki ab ab uski sena ka paksh thoda mazboot hua hai aur wo apne desh ka aur nuksaan honay se bacha lega.Daren josh aur gusse kay saath aage badha par tabhi usne dhyaan diya ki uske saath iss hamle mey bache sainik to saavdhani se aad lekar aage badh rahe thay par unke Backup troops kay sainik nidarr hokar badhe jaa rahe thay aur unke hathiyaar bhi purane lag rahe thay.Daren nay unhe rookne ki kosish ki kyoki wo dheere-dheere chhupkar aage badhne kay paksh mey tha par uski baat kisi nay naa suni.

Baazi palat gayi thi aur ab palda Razed ki taraf jhuk raha tha ki tabhi khule maidaan mey bekhoof aage badh rahe backup sainiko par Planes se hawaai hamla hua. Iss hamle se maidaan me bhaag rahe lagbhag sabhi sainiko ka marna pakka maana jaa raha tha par jab dhuaa chhata to nazara behad bhayanak tha kyoki kate pair,Bina sar kay dhadd,shatigasth haath......yaha tak ki alag hui aankhien bhi Prak kay saniko ki taraf badh rahi thi.Ye nazara to morche par bache Razed kay sainiko ki bhi saanse rook raha tha.Daren abhi hairat se ye sab dekh hi raha tha ki usne apne kandhe par ak javaan saiknik ka haath mehsoos kiya.Usne mudkar dekha to aascharya se wo jadd ho gaya......kuch bol na saka. Uss sainik ki aawaz dobara gunji.

"Beta, Maine kaha tha naa ki mai waapas aaunga.......".

Wo John tha jo apne murda saathiyo kay saath apne desh kay upar dobara ho rahe iss anyay ko rookne aa pahuncha tha.Jald hi Murdo nay Prak kay sainiko par paar paa liya.Par phir bhi sabhi murda shareer shatigrast haalat mey badhe jaa rahe thay......pata nah kya thi unki manzil.....wo sabhi har baadha ko par kar aur kai hazaro kilometeres ka safar tayy karke pahunche uss bunker tak jaha Prak ka shashak Malsun chuppa hua tha.Murde zameen mey sama gaye aur bhumigat buker kay neeche se nikle.Malsun ko bahut buri maut kay ghaat utaara gaya.Agle din seema rekha kay nishaan 25 saal pehle waale thay aur Razed ko apni khooyi zameen aur sammaan waapas mil gaya tha.

The End.

The Missing Flight

2010-08-09T00:44:00.000-07:00

Dinesh Fiji ka naagrik tha aur Bharat mey ak Air Traffic Controller kay roop mey kai saalo se kaam kar raha tha. Uske liye aaj ka din bhi aam dino jaisa tha. Apni desk par baitha wo tezi se kai Air Planes ko sambhal raha tha aur kuch dair mey zyadatar Aeroplanes ko wo apni karya seema se bahar bhej chuka tha.Ab wo apna kaam kuch aaram se kar raha tha. Dosto se hassi-mazak,ghar ki baatein,aane waale dino kay plans yahi sab uss Contol Tower par roz aam ki baatien thi.Aaj ka din bhi aise hi guzar raha tha.Par aaj shayad Dinesh inn baato kay chakkar mey apne kaam se kuch zyada hi vimukh ho gaya tha.

Dinesh - "Flight 297......Flight 297......this is Northen Amausi Base.....are you reading me.....hello....."

Ajay-Kya hua,Dinesh ?

Dinesh-"Flight 297 ko kuch dair pehle sabhi updates di thi aur uske baad ab dekha to wo radar par nahi hai.

Ajay-Oh God,Dobara dekh....kosish karte raho.

Lekin Dinesh ki anginat kosishein vifal rahi aur Flight 297 se koi jawab nahi aaya. Dinesh ko uske ghar par haadse ki jaanch honay tak nazarband kar diya gaya. Flight 297 aakhri update tak Raguveerpur,Jharkhand, kay ghane jungleo se guzar rahi thi 1 din beet jaane kay baad ab tak sabhi nay uss Flight kay surakshit honay ki aas tyaag di thi aur uski khoj been ka kaam jaari tha. Dinesh ki laaparwahi se kai log bahut gusse mey thay,Sarkar par janta aur bahari desho se dabaav badhne laga. Dinesh par ak hi din mey kuch jaanleva hamle bhi huey aur Bharat mey Fiji Dutavaas(Embassy) nay Bharat Sarkar se Dinesh ko kuch dino tak gupchup tareke se Fiji mey hirasat mey rakhne ka prastaav rakha taaki uski jaan ko koi khatra naa ho.Dinesh Airport aaya aur usne Fiji jaa rahi Flight kay liye Amausi Airport par "Check In" kiya aur .......... wo gayab ho gaya.Usse Airport par har jagah dhoonda jaa raha tha par uska kahi pata nahi tha.Adhikariyo ko pehle se khabar thi ki Dinesh Fiji logo se chhup kar jaa raha hai aur usko koi nuksaan naa pahunche isliye uspar nazar bhi rah rahe thay par phir naa jaane kaise wo gayab ho gaya.Sabhi ko yahi lag raha tha ki kisi ugr sangathan kay sadasyo nay uska apharan kar liya hai.

LEKIN DINESH TO FLIGHT MEY BAITH CHUKA THA.

Idhar Dinesh Plane mey baith chuka tha aur uska plane udd bhi chuka tha..................kuch dair tak to sab samanya raha par thodi dair baad waha ka vatavaran Dinesh ko sandigdh laga.Sabhi yatriyo ki nazar Dinesh par hi thi aur uski seat bhi sabse alag thi.Usne apne bagal waale yatri se poocha ki ye flight kaha jaa rahi hai to sabhi nay aksaath jawaab mey bas yahi kaha......

"Flight 297"

Dinesh ko iss jawab ki umeed nahi thi,wo sihar uttha aur usse pata chal gaya ki uski galti ki saza dene khud uski galti kay shikaar huey murde aaye hai.

Agle din Flight 297 ka malba Raghuveerpur kay Jungleo mey mil gaya sabhi yatriyo ki laasho kay avsesh bhi mil gaye aur sabhi yatriyo ki pehchan,shinakht bhi ho gayi par sabka aashcharya tab apni hadde todd gaya jab uss malbe mey uss vimaan mey safar kar rahe yatriyo se ak laash zyada mili aur uss laash ki pehchan Dinesh kay roop mey hui.

The End.

उलटफेर

2010-08-09T00:30:00.000-07:00

Ye kahani hai "All India Jungli Board" dwara maanyta prapt Ek aise school ki jiske 11th aur 12th standard kay vidhyarthiyon kay ek doosre se prem kay kaaran unn sab ki zindagi badal gayi.....yaani ho gaya ulatpher.

Makhan - Yaar, Sheru suna hai ki iss baar farewell 12th ka result aane kay baad diya jaayega, taaki hoonhaar students ko sammanit kiya jaa sake.

Hariya - Nahi, shayad chunaavo ki wajah se farewell sthagit ho gaya hai.....ya school waalo ko 12th kay students dwara exams pass karne ka bharosa nahi hai.

Moti - Wajah chahe jo bhi ho par humare pyare seniors ab humey chhod kar chale jaayenge.

Sheru - Haan, Yaad kar unn sabke purse ka 5 centimeters to hum sab milkar kum kiya karte thay. Unhi ki wajah se aas paas kay fast food waalo ko achcha roozgaar milta tha. Yaaro, kuch socho hum itne pyare seniors ko aise nahi jaane de sakte.

Moti - Mai soch chuka hun. Humey poore 11th kay saare sections se chanda ikkhatta karna chahiye.

Hariya - Iss se kya hoga ?

Moti - Abe, Hariya tu dimaag se hamesha banjar hi rahega. Jo hoga wo Jungli Board kay mukhyalay mey pata chal jaayega.

11th kay sabhi students chanda jama karke Jungli Board kay mukhyalay mey uss board kay adyaksh Junglesh kay paas jaate hai.

Sheru - Sir, ye lijiye 20,000 rupaye aur saare 12th kay students (150 students), jo Jungli Senior Secondary School mey padhte hai ko fail kar dijiye.

Junglesh - Chup karo, tum logo se zyada to tumhare hi school kay Nursery kay bachcho nay apne furniture kay liye diya tha.

Makhan - Sir, please, humey iss tarah niraash mat kijiye. Hum aapko apna aadarsh jungli man maante hai.

Makhan ki thodi hi dair ki Buttering se Junglesh khush ho jaata hai.

Junglesh - Theek hai, par mai sirf aadhe 12th ko fail karunga, nahi to sabko shaq ho sakta hai.

Hariya - Thanks, sir, baaki students ka intezaam hum khud kar lenge.

Moti - Arre, Hariya tu to banjar nahi raha re. Kya socha tune baaki bache 75 seniors kay baare mey ?

Hariya - Baaki 75 ko hum log apni inbuilt jungli harkato ka shikaar banakar 12th ka exams dene se rook denge.

Moti - Great idea, mere andar ka kutta to abhi se jaag raha hai.

Junglesh - Ab tum sab office se bahar jaao mujhe tumhare school kay 12th kay students se bhi milna hai.

Sheru - Sir, humare baad.....unn logo se kisi bhi tarah ki rishvat mat le lijiyega varna mere andar kay sher ki neend bahut kachchi hai.

Kuch dair baad Junglesh apne office mey Jungli Senior Seondary School kay hi 12th kay chhatro se mukhatib tha.

Abu - Howww......Sir, ye lijiye 150,000 rupaye. Hum sabhi nay khud kay aur apne papa tak kay purse se kai centimeter kum karke jodde hai. Aap humare pyare seniors ko howww.....howww.......howww........

Junglesh - Arre, aage bol Howvey.

Lili - Sir, ye Abu hai, ye to iski aadat hai.

Junglesh - Badi jaldi abu ban gaye, kiske abu hai ye ?

Abu - Howw....itne pyaar se pooch rahe hai to....apna hi samajh lijiye....howww.

Junglesh - Kya ?

Lili - Sir ye humare saath padhta hai iska naam Abu hai aur ye 'Howww....howww' karna iski aadat hai. Sir, hum aur humare juniors bade pyaar se itne saalo tak school mey saath rehte aaye hai. Iss saal hum logo kay alag honay ka khatra hai. Hum chahte hai ki aap unn sabhi ki iss saal kay 11th kay exams ki mark sheets kay saath saath 12th ki bhi jaali mark sheets banva dijiye. Taaki wo humare juniors naa rehkar humare saath kay ho jaayein aur hamesha humare saath rahein.

Abu - Howww....humare school ki parampara ko dhyaan mey rakhte huey unhe Junglipan kay alawa har subject mey passing marks kay aas paas hi number dijiyega....howww..

Junglesh - Tum sabne to unki Doctorate tak ki degree ka intezaam kar diya. Chinta mat karo mai unki 12th ki nakli mark sheets bana dunga.

Ussi samay junior jungli paltan bahar baatein kar rahi thi.

Hariya - Humey phir se kuch rupayo ka intezaam karna hoga aur uske baad, humey Lele aur Dede bhai se milna hoga.

Sheru - Ye kaun hai ?

Makhan - Suna hai ek bhai payment leta hai aur ek payment dene waalo kay dushmano ko punishment deta hai.

Wo sabhi milkar Lele bhai ko paise dekar apne baaki bache 75 seniors ko peetne ka kaam batate hai jinhe Junglesh nay fail karne se mana kar diya tha aur Dede bhai unn chinhit 75 seniors ko alag alag sthaano par pitva dete hai.

Kuch Dino baad.

Moti - ....kaam ho gaya Dede bhai ?

Dede bhai - Haan, sab itne kumzor thay ki unhe peetne mey mazaa hi nahi aa raha tha. Isliye sabki 206 haddiyo ko do-do baar ammmm kitna hua.... haan 412 baar todda. Tab bhi kuch haath nahi khule aur mazaa sa nahi aaya to sabko maar maar kar unka D.N.A. structure tak badal daala....tab jaakar dil ko thandak si mili. Iska pata tab chala jab ek ladka jo bahut 'Howww....howww' karta tha wo ab 'aau maau chaau' karne laga hai.

12th ka result ghoshit hua. Farewell kay din 11th kay students 12th ki mark sheets kay saath seniors ban gaye thay. Pehle rahe unke 75 fail ho chuke seniors unhe apne pairro par serve kar rahe thay aur 74 pitey huey seniors unhe wheel chairs par serve kar rahe thay. Ek poorva senior Abu ek koney mey pada 'aau....maau....chaau' badbada raha tha.

Iss tarah aapas kay adbhut pyaar kay kaaran pehli baar 'seniors', 'juniors' ban gaye thay aur 'juniors', 'seniors.'

The End!

उलटफेर (Intro)

2010-08-09T00:22:00.000-07:00

Ye kahani hai "All India Jungli Board" dwara maanyta prapt Ek aise school ki jiske 11th aur 12 standard kay vidhyarthiyon kay ek doosre se prem kay kaaran un sab ki zindagi badal gayi.....yaani ho gaya hai ulatpher.

11 Class mey mere friends chahte thay ki mai unke liye ek Drama likhu jisko wo farewell par perfrom kar sake. Deadline 1 week ki thi aur maine ye 1 din mey hi likh diya. Drama kay characters mere kuch dosto ki aadaton aur kahi baaton par bhi based thay. Ye unko pasand to aaya par acting aur audience ko samjhane ki nazar se mushkil laga. To unhone meri purani kahani "Jai Jhule Lal!" par hi perform kiya. Halaki, utna achchha aur kahani kay hisaab se convincing to nahi kiya par phir bhi badhiya tha. Time ki kami ki wajah se edit bhi karna pada tha unhe wo natak. Anyways, prastut hai "उलटफेर". Sorry, par ye poora Hindi software se dobara type karne ki himmat nahi hai.

The Making of 'Dirty' Scene in a Bollywood Movie

2010-08-08T06:54:00.000-07:00

Note - Don't go on title. Please read the whole stuff. No offense intended to anyone. Focus is on Indian 'Bollywood' style not on rape.

Scene in Script – A dirty mind villain is walking towards heroin with dirty thoughts in his mind….in short a Rape scene. As this was a Hindi "Family" Movie they were only covering face expressions of villain and heroin.

Director was briefing villain and heroin about this scene. First Director started the shooting of about 30 seconds of Helpless Heroin’s expressions.

Director – You have to give us "pure strange, puzzled plus frightened expressions" like you gave after your wardrobe malfunction in an event last month. What/Which/Who is the most scariest thing in this world for you?

Heroin – My Mother in Law and my Sister in Law.

Director – But we can't afford any of the two, and after all members of my film unit are humans too like you. I have another option though not as great as your Mother in Law or Sister in Law but still above average. Where is the sweeper?

Sweeper makes a jumping entry to impress the Director with a poly bag full of cockroaches, fresh from gutter.

Director – Lights,
Sound,
Roll Camera,
Action…..wait..

Lights,
Sound,
Roll Camera,
Roll Cockroaches,
Action!

Sweeper opens the poly bag and cockroaches got their freedom once again but instead of proceeding towards the 'ready' Heroin they turned back and marched towards the film unit. Now every member of the crew was giving "pure strange, puzzled plus frightened expressions" except the Heroin and the Sweeper. Villain ran for his life and vanished into the Make-Up-Vanity-Van of the Heroin. Many cockroaches vanished in this event but at last few heterosexual cockroaches returned towards the heroin and film unit resumed the film shoot.

Now, 30 seconds of villain's face expression.

"Dark room…you walk towards helpless lady...give me those classic expressions, Paapi ji. You are such a versatile rapist of our film industry but those memorable vintage expressions you gave in 'Pappi le le' (Kiss Me), 'Dushashan' (A horny mythological character and wanna be rapist), etc are missing…..okay think of your wife seducing you."

Paapi – Ugh...Yaak!! Actually, I feel nothing new. Even when I walk towards my wife smiling to ask for tea or something...she calls Police saying that I am attempting a marital rape....man.

Director – Okay, cool down, sir, think of my wife....

Paapi – Haaaaaa!

Director – That’s my rapist! Now you have to walk towards the two cameras with this face...Lean on the ground camera....Foreplay with the two cameras....there is a Sari, blouse, etc, beside the ground camera pull everything....oh why I am telling you all this, you are a pro...and..and sir though we are covering your upper body but give us some pelvic thrusts you were expert in giving in your struggling days as a Background Dancer. Ready! Okay then....

Lights,
Sound,
Roll Camera,
Roll Villain,
Action!

Paapi – Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha....come on, Baby, Ha Ha Ha...I can’t wait..

Director whispers – "Sir, the pelvic thrusts from mid air..."

Paapi – Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.......AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Misbalanced Paapi falls on the camera and breaks himself and the camera.

Director – Idiot, I suggested him to take a break from his monotonous roles and he broke himself...Pack Up!!!!!!!

The End.

थम जा...

2010-08-07T02:15:00.001-07:00

मैंने अपने आस-पास ऐसे बहुत से लोग देखे है जो थोड़े से मज़े या तारीफ़ के लिए ऐसे काम कर बैठते है की जिनकी वजह से वो अपनी और दूसरो की जान खतरे मे डाल बैठते है खासकर ऐसा सडको पर उन्मादी लोग करते है जिनको लगता है की उनकी तेज़ स्पीड सभी को इम्प्रेस कर रही है......but as they say "Speeding. No one thinks big of you."

मत प्यार कर रफ्तार से,
कुछ मज़ा ले इंतज़ार मे.
जीकर मिलेगी जीत जो,
मत बदल उसे इस हार से.
लानी है अगर रफ्तार तो...
उसको ला अपने संसार मे....

ये तेज़ दौड़ किस मतलब की?
दिखावा...वो भी "प्यार" मे?
मत बढा गम को गिरवी रख के ख़ुशी,
कुछ कद्र कर....ये है ज़िन्दगी...

देख जो लोग भीड़ मे पिसते...
हर एक से बंधे है ना जाने कितने रिश्ते..
दूसरो के लिए अपनी आँखें खोल,
किसी की मौत के बाद रिश्ते नहीं बिकते मोल...

जनून को दिल मे पाल,
मत चढा उसे सर पर...
बस एक गलती बनती है घर और शमशान का अंतर.

खुद को आजमाने के बहुत मौके आयेंगे,
सड़क पर चलते लोग रोज़ अपना काम करेंगे...
तेरी रफ़्तार देख कर थम नहीं जायेंगे....

अपने हुनर दिखाने की जगह पड़ी है कई..
सड़क पर लापरवाही जमती नहीं...

मोल गया बचपन

2010-08-07T01:43:00.000-07:00

खिलखिलाता बचपन जैसे रूठ गया,
धुन्दला सा गाँव पीछे कहीं छूट गया.

अभी तो 'उसे' माँ के आँचल मे था सोना,
खेत खलियानों मे था खोना,
नन्ही आँखों से सपनो को था संजोना,
उसका बचपन वापस दो ना.

फिर एक मासूम काम की तरफ मुड़ा,
रोटी के लिए मेहनत करने वाले छोटूओ मे एक छोटू और जुड़ा.

बर्तनों से खेलता,
दिन भर मालिक के ताने झेलता,
वो गिरता...लडखडाता,
अपनी भावनाओ को क्या खूबी से छुपाता.

अपनी हर इच्छा मारकर दूसरो के 'आर्डर' लेता,
पगार की आस मे अपना हर दुख सहता.

नन्हे कंधो पर डलवा दे जो दुनियादारी,
ऐसी दौलत हराम की है सारी,
क्यों नहीं ये समाज शर्म से डूब मरता,
जिसे आगे बढ़ने के लिए बच्चो का सहारा है लेना पड़ता.

My Island Trip

2010-08-05T03:15:00.000-07:00

By 9-Year-Old Mohit....

We went to an island,
Full of beaches and sand.
The wind was blowing fast,
We set our camp at last.

The mountains were high,
..Caves were dark,
There was also fear of sharks.

The day was warm,
The night was cool,
Water was all around like a huge swimming pool.

Everywhere we found coconut,
But the problem with them was...how to cut?
The spring provided us water,
As well as natural shower.

Fishing, swimming were other activities,
Which were time pass keys.
In the end, I would like to say,
Explore new things everyday!

Social Modeling

2010-08-05T02:57:00.001-07:00

A young couple from a European Country Tom and Trisha were on a World Tour. After few weeks of mixed adventure in African Countries they reached India.....their first stop in Asia. They were roaming on the bumpy roads to get the real feel of India.

Tom - "Darling, look at that...."

Trisha - "Who? Mahatma Gandhi?"

Tom - "Why do you have only four guesses for every new thing and surprise in India? There are billion of people and things In India apart from Taj Mahal, Kama Sutra, Handicrafts and Of Course Mahatma Gandhi."

Tom - "Look at that poor soul on the side of the pavement."

Trisha -"Oh, wounded, poor man, using a copy of 'Public Times' to hide his privates."

Tom - "We must help him."

The couple rushed towards that 'Poor Soul'.

Trisha - "Tom, give him your old...er...new shirts and trousers."

Tom - "We should call the Doctor first and offer him some packed food. He is shivering...BIG TIME..'Hey man, we are right here for you. You need something? Feel free to ask anything.'"

The Poor Soul stares at Trisha and Tom alters his promise in his earlier sentence.

Tom - "....I mean not anything."

Annoyed Poor Soul shouted.

"What's your problem man?"

Tom - "You are wounded......you were shivering...we want to help you."

"O, Come on! Not again...for Devil's sake.....this...that's why I was 'shivering'."

Poor Soul setting his long hairs back showed the couple his latest I-Pod and ear plugs.

Trisha - "An I-Pod....you have...."

"Ya, I have an I-Pod....by the way, do me a favor..."

Trisha - "What?"

"Please download the latest anti-virus on my Lap Top and Leap Top. These Fuckers..I meant Hackers are making my life hell."

Tom - "We thought that India is a developing poor country and you surely looked like a Beggar."

"Well, mates, this is my profession."

Trisha - "Begging?"

"O, no....no...I am a Social Model."

Tom - "...and What's that? Never heard about Social Modeling before."

"Actually, I regularly travel in various states, cities and villages of India and work temporarily for Non Governmental Organizations (N.G.O.s) working for many social causes. According to the needs of my clients I pose in different make-ups, get-ups receiving money, gifts, help, aid, etc, from the members of N.G.O.s....they use my photos to gather money and grants from Public, Government, Corporates and he he...Foreign Countries. I was waiting for my client....and you people just...."

After few minutes Doctor (called by Tom) arrived at the scene and was attending Tom and Trisha....both fainted in shock.

The End!

India is estimated to have around 1-2 million NGOs....huh!

'अच्छा' बंधन

2010-08-03T08:34:00.000-07:00

Mauke milne par mujhe wo satati,
Par har kisi se shaitaan mujhe batati,
Upar se har shararat ka credit mujhe dilvati.

Waise to wo bahut kum khaati,
Par fast food, chocolate, soft drinks, par ladne marne tak baat pahunch jaati.

Didi ki har cheez samay par tayyar ho jaati,
Ek mai tha jisko school kay liye hamesha Mommy tayyar karvati,
Bachpan bhar mai sochta raha ki wo apni books par kis cheez se cover hai chadhati.

Khud se koi kaam bigad jaata to ro-peet kar bach jaati,
Meri baari mey mujhe khoob chidhati.

Apni cheezon kay liye mujhe zabardasti bazaar daudati,
Pata nahi kaise jaan boojh kar itne paise deti thi ki unka samaan to poora aa jaaye par mujhe naa mil paaye ek bhi toffee.

Raksha Bandhan, Kanjak, Bhaiya dooj, par khoob paise bhunati,
Jisme se badi mushkil se apne chhote bhai ko koi 'chijee' dilvati.

Mai bhi unhe bahut satata,
Par kai baar raat mey darr lagne par unke bed par so jaata.

Waqt guzra aur unki shaadi ka din aaya,
Unke saath guzra har pal...vaakya mujhe yaad aaya,
Mai phir se darr gaya.....
Mujhe apni didi ko khoney ka darr lag raha tha.

'Taaron ki chhaon' mey unki doli utthi,
Mai bas yahi manata raha ki abhi wo utarkar mujhse pehle ki tarah ladengi.

Bahut rulati hai,
Bahut yaad aati hai,
Jab behan vida ho kar jaati hai.

सूना बचपन in 'Pothiz'

2010-08-02T01:02:00.000-07:00

My poem "सूना बचपन" published in the inaugural issue of "Pothiz" magazine July 2010. Source - Pothi.com

वो किसी की गोद मे चढ़ता,
अपनों के कपड़े गंदे करता,
पहले सहारे से.... और फ़िर एक दिन ख़ुद चलता.
लडखडाती चाल से चीज़ें बिगाड़ता,
फ़िर तुतलाती जुबां से मदद को पुकारता,
बड़े भाई - बहिन पर गुस्सा उतारता.

स्कूल ना जाने की जिद करता,
कार्टून्स देखने के लिए लड़ मरता.
छुपकर डब्बे मे कीडे - मकोडे पालता,
क्या होता है देखने के लिए.....पौधों मे शैंपू का पानी डालता.
२ और २ को जोड़ ना पता,
नई फिल्मो के ग़लत गाने गाता.
पर उसने ऐसा कुछ नही किया,
....शायद दूसरे अनाथो की तरह वो भी बचपन मे बड़ा हो गया.

AIDS Sufferer Vampire

2010-08-02T00:07:00.000-07:00

Place : A Private Hospital, India.

"Doctor, Haaaaaaaaaa!"

Doctor engrossed in a report "Sore throat, Cough and Cold...second floor, room number 19."

But this was a special case.

"Doctor....haaaaaaaa!"

At last, Doctor looking at the visitor "Jeeeeeez..Yuck...wak ...what a Buggy..go to the next building?"

"What for?"

Doctor - "That building is Theater and Movie Studio and you were going there...but in confusion and hurry bumped in here."

"No...haaaaaa!"

Doctor - "Okay, so you are nervous before your performance or screen test. You wanna rehearse and are practicing here...O Come on, 'Pee-Pee Man' this is a Hospital."

"I am Desi Vampire...somebody 're-killed' me few decades ago and buried my body near the sewer.....today some freaky stuff (ya..even for me) along with bumper-decomposed gases leaked at my place from that gutter....and I guess that's enough inspiration...er..irritation for me to rise again and rule the world."

Doctor - "I am a Doctor....not a kid...and you are a normal person trying to imitate some cheap TV program's weak Vampire...."

Desi Vampire - "Okay, then...call your peon..kiddo."

Doctor - "Shambhoo....."

Shambhu - "Haaaaaaaaaaaa!"

Doctor - "Oh! Shambhoo looks like an sucked elastic Bamboo...Okay you win...you are a Vampire....I mean wow you are so great....the ultimate Yo Man...I love you. So...now what? Are you going to suck my...."

Desi Vampire - "Haaaaaa!"

Doctor - "..I mean drink my Blood, easy my Lord....but why are you telling me all this...Is this your Modus Operandi...he he...What the fuc....awesome!"

Desi Vampire - "I was on my way to 'suck' people and soon I came to this Hospital...I bit a patient (who laughed instantly when I went there) and drank few liters of blood but after that I feel like....sick...my hairline receded, my vision needs a Bifocal with a Telescope and a Microscope...since then I am tolerating a voice "peeeeeeeeeeeeee" in my ears....even I went to Toilet couple of times but still this "Peeeee" is on....what's worst is that one of my 'showpeice' fangs broked right outside your office when I was 'busy' with your peon Shambhoo. That's why I told you all this...Please help me."

Doctor - "You are feeling weak and sick."

Desi Vampire - "Yes, like somebody sucked me. No energy left.."

Doctor - "That first victim of yours in this Hospital was in which ward...."

Desi Vampire - "Ground Floor..Right section, I don't remember the name of that ward."

Doctor - Oh My God! That's the ward for AIDS patients.

Desi Vampire - And what's that?

Doctor - AIDS stands for Acquired Immuno Deficiency Syndrome. It's a new disease invented...I mean discovered in later half of 20th Century...I guess you were buried for more than 5-6 decades...I am sorry you sucked an AIDS patient....so now you are H.I.V. Positive....your immune system is getting weaker with every passing second because you consumed quite a lot from that patient. It's too late now.

Desi Vampire -Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!

Doctor - Don't worry you can still become an integrated part of this society....Our Hospital provides free medical and counseling facilities to AIDS patients.

The End!

Over?

2010-08-01T23:13:00.000-07:00

I don't know why I am writing this but.....

I see India’s education system as a stumbling block towards its objectives of achieving inclusive growth. Millions of people join workforce but most of them lack requisite skills and the mindset for productive employment. There are numerous fields in which one can make his career according to his interests and aptitude but in India the number of 'respectable' fields which provide financial security are limited. Majority of parents force or brainwash their children to choose (and like) subjects which are related to these prestigious jobs. Somewhere general Indian education system is result of this widespread, generalized thinking, it offers selected subjects at Primary level, Secondary Level and Senior Secondary level. After school there are a lot of options in which one can make his/her career but very less people opt vocational courses like Security Services, Fine Arts, Garment Stitching, Dairy Farming, Retail Marketing, etc. Everyone wants to be an Engineer, Doctor, Manager, Accountant, Banker, etc. Indian education system follows mainly 10 + 2 + 3 pattern.

10 = High School (common syllabus),

+ 2 = Intermediate (where student opts for streams with subject combination of his/her interests like Commerce Stream, Biology Stream, Arts Stream, Mathematics Stream. There are many Regional and 2 National Boards CBSE, ICSE (ISC) for education till Intermediate.

+ 3 = Graduation (4 years for Engineering courses)

+ (followed by different Post Graduate Courses of varied nature and durations)

To be a desirable and eligible candidate the Certificates, Degrees, Mark Sheets. etc related to each of these levels is very important. A "throughout first division" term is used for people who manage to score 60% or above marks in their academics at least till graduation.

In High School subjects offered (5) were Mathematics, Science (Chemistry, Physics, Biology), Social Studies (History, Geography, Civics, Economics), English, Hindi. I liked General Knowledge, Current Affairs, Reasoning, English & Hindi literature, Art, Sports, Computers. Unfortunately , majority of things I loved were not covered in my school syllabus or were Grading Subjects which were not added in our total marks. Classes of Grading Subjects were very rare and casual. Nobody bothered about these subjects. There were 54 Students in my class 10 – A2 (English Medium), other popular medium was Hindi. The A1 batch was original English Medium batch of RLB Vikas Nagar Sector 3 Branch and we A2 section were transferred from other primary branch Vikas Nagar Sector 6 of the same school. Most of us in our batch were classmates for years. I got admission in the school in Class 6 when my family moved from Agra to Lucknow.

After passing class 8 the secondary school level was whole new and challenging thing. My academic performance was average and I was happy initially that I am not in the spot light for right or wrong reasons. The aggregate marks of students in Quarterly Unit Tests, Half Yearly Examinations ranged from 35% to 80%. Though, in Board exams (10 Finals) organized by CBSE the marking was lenient in comparison to school exams. I scored between 55% to 65% in these exams in the final exam of class 9 I scored 70%. Though, ranks were assigned to top 15 students out of 54. If ranks were given to all (which were informally calculated by us) my rank was always in the bracket of 20 to 35. But I still was in spot light because of my extreme and contrasting performance. I remember more than once that I scored highest in a subject and lowest in another. My marks fluctuated from 80 to less than 35. Amazingly, My aggregate score was always around 60%. Teachers...confused how to handle rare cases like me tagged me under 'Careless Students', 'Weak', etc.

I'd a crush on a girl in my class. In primary years we were unknown to each other. Finally, we talked a few times in class 9. Unfortunately, I was super shy and she initiated all the little conversations we had....and then arrived the villain "The First Unit Test" of class 9. I scored 59% (failed in a subject and scoring more than 80 in other two) and she 72%. Instantly, I found myself out of her league. An unsaid gap kept me away from her....It was not insecurity because I knew that I am good in few other things and everything differs from person to person.

Regular comments on my marks and work by teachers reminded me of this gap whenever I wanted to approach her. I remember there was a General Knowledge Quiz contest in which I wanted to participate. My teacher called me and shouted in front of whole class "first, you learn to pass in my subject..." Whoa! I studied hard suppressing my hobbies like comics, books, music, sports, etc but it was too late I scored 80% in 10 Board Exams to fill the gap....but she scored 87%. Gap was narrowed but not filled. We are on Facebook and other Social Networking sites (not friends) with many common friends but the gap is still there. Maybe in future.......

Mind you, I am as they say "throughout first divisioner". :)

Side effects of eternally secret crush!

Her friend (lets call her K) often shared bench with her caught me staring in their direction a few times, thought I liked her (K). No comments on her but one thing I knew for sure was that she really liked TV Serials, Dramas ..why? Because she told everyone..even my friends that I was after her. To imitate cheap shows and get spotlight. I think along with bench Miss K shared this thing (plus her framed stories/scenes) with Miss Crush.

इंकलाब जिंदाबाद

2010-08-01T23:07:00.000-07:00

Poem "Inquilab Zindabad" published in Jways Magazine (2008).

Page 1

Page 2

'True' is 'False' (Part 2) : Facts

2010-07-30T23:43:00.000-07:00

Dowry Facts -

1) - MNC - Multi National Company.

2) - Section 498A of Indian Penal Code - Whoever, being the husband or the relative of the husband of a woman, subjects such woman to cruelty shall be punished with imprisonment for a term which may extend to three years and shall also be liable to fine.

Explanation-For the purpose of this section, "cruelty" means-

(a) Any willful conduct which is of such a nature as is likely to drive the woman to commit suicide or to cause grave injury or danger to life, limb or health whether mental or physical) of the woman; or

(b) Harassment of the woman where such harassment is with a view to coercing her or any person related to her to meet any unlawful demand for any property or valuable security or is on account of failure by her or any person related to her meet such demand.]

3) - Plus there is IPC Section 304B and if death of a married woman does "not occur under normal circumstances", within seven years of her marriage. Whoever commits dowry death is required to be punished with imprisonment for a term which shall not be less than seven years but which may extend to imprisonment for life. Many times a suicide or accident turn into "Dowry Death", thanks to many families who thinks there was nothing wrong with their daughters, sisters.

4) - Section 302 of Indian Penal Code - Whoever commits murder shall be punished with death, or imprisonment for life and shall also be liable to fine.

5) - There are thousands of registered N.G.O (Non Governmental Organization)for the upliftment of females in India plus Government Departments and of course a full fledged "Mahila Aayog" a semi ministry for women. They have to do something...they do...they frame stats, surveys, etc and publish them everywhere to negative-generalize "all" men and glorify "all" women. In the process they suppress the reports of false accusation of crime against women. Men involved in crime against women in even 10 years is less then 2% of the total more than 520 Millions Indian men and in 10 years millions are added to the adult population.

6) - About the Misuse of Anti-Dowry Act.

Your wife/daughter-in-law who's demands are not met can make a written false complaint of dowry harassment to a nearby police station. The husband, his old parents and relatives are immediately arrested without sufficient investigation and put behind bars on a non-bailable terms. Even if the complaint is false, you shall be presumed guilty until you prove that you are innocent.

498a can only be invoked by wife/daughter-in-law or her relative. Most cases where Sec 498A is invoked turn out to be false (as repeatedly accepted by High Courts and Supreme Court in India) as they are mere blackmail attempts by the wife (or her close relatives) when faced with a strained marriage. In most cases 498a complaint is followed by the demand of huge amount of money (extortion) to settle the case out of the court. This section is non-bailable(you have to appear in court and get bail from the judge), non-compoundable (complaint can't be withdrawn) and cognizable (register and investigate the complaint, although in practice most of the time arrest happens before investigation).

There have been countless instances where, without any investigation, the police has arrested elderly parents, unmarried sisters, pregnant sister-in-laws and even 3 year old children. In these cases unsuspecting family of husband has to go through a lot of mental torture and harassment by the corrupt Indian legal system. A typical case goes on for years (5-7 years is typical) and the conviction rate is about 2% only. Some accused parents, sisters and even husbands have committed suicide after time in jail.

'True' is 'False' : Story

2010-07-30T23:39:00.000-07:00

"Your parents insulted my family in public. So many people who knew me and my family were laughing at us."

"No, Soumya you got it all wrong. They wanted to explain your relatives and family that we were in a festive Hindu Ceremony and they (your family and relatives) were drinking liquor and creating scene in public....that's why my Mother and Father lost their temper and said all that stuff...in the process they pushed some of your drunk relatives..but even then I think it was not offensive."

"Wow! but you know what, I think it was offensive. What about the Interview Call of my sister from the M.N.C. where your father is a Deputy Director...we made her fill the form of that company. We told all our friends and relatives that she is selected in that company as an accountant...as my Father in Law is on a very high post in that company but she was not selected....how embarrassing it was..."

"But, Papa said that there were more qualified and eligible people for the vacancies and he...."

"Ya, I know that he is Honesty-Is-The-Fucking-Best-Policy-Man, that too in India. My Parents are waiting for me outside and I am going but before that I have a surprise for you..."

"What? We can talk, separation and divorce are not the right options."

"Ha Ha...Oh, my poor Husband. Don't you think it's too simple...Now I have a Kitchen Knife with Sasu Maa ji's (Mother In Law) fingerprints on them...then I have my Bottle of acid of my Post Graduation Course...you used it when our sink got choked...so, here's your fingerprints...we will manage Sasur ji's (Father In Law) too."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"See...Holding this knife with my saree i cut myself...here on my elbow..aah!!...On my leg...ouch!!..then few drops of acid on my legs...aaaaaiiiii Mummy!!!...it hurts much more than I thought....not to worry and don't call the Doctor because I already called the Police...and please don't dare to repeat your foolish questions, now I am official..amm...authorized Dowry victim...By the way, one more random thing which I always wanted to tell you...our neighbor's teenager son...yes, that talented Cricket player, Sumit gives me the services of his 7 Incher almost daily which is 2 Inch more than yours..."

"What...wait..we can talk..it's not over, No...Please...don't put false allegation of Dowry on me...please think about my career, my life, my family's reputation."

"Let me finish, Raman Darling. It's not you only...my In-Laws are also criminals under Anti Dowry Act...as you three not only attacked and abused me but also injured my family....they are bleeding outside...after the struggle...Indian Police comes late...you have to wait for few more minutes...and as 'Indian Railways' always announce 'Inconvenience caused is deeply regretted...Ting Tong!' Now you and your parents go to the City's Central Jail under Indian Penal Code 498A, which states that 'Husband or relative of husband of a woman subjecting her to cruelty shall be punished with imprisonment for a term which may extend to three years and shall also be liable to fine.' Ask details about this act from the Police when they arrive...now, it's time for you and your family to face humiliation."

"No..it's not IPC 498A for me, you Bitch...it's IPC 302."

"What?"

"Oh, My darling, you watch so many Bollywood Hindi Movies..you know what it means...IPC 302 says Whoever commits murder shall be punished with death, or imprisonment for life and shall also be liable to fine."

Raman grabbed the knife from her and stabbed Soumya till death. Then he killed her parents who were "injured" and "bleeding" in the garden waiting for the Police Party.

At last, after few more minutes, Police Jeep Siren breaks the monotonous silence.

The End!!!!!!

Ahem! Aha! Ahey! Oho! Artwork! Lolzz XD

2010-07-30T02:52:00.000-07:00

It's a hybrid of Bhokal and Parmanu. :)

...Because I am a Sidekick!

2010-07-29T03:22:00.000-07:00

I have seen many hardworking, talented people who are great in what they do but due to certain circumstances they never get the recognition and place they deserve. These people are everywhere yet nowhere.

I make bridges,
But never walk on them.

I can pass the ball,
But can never score the goal.

I can Dance very well,
But in the background...not anywhere else.

I am in the winning team’s yacht,
But can never be Man of the match.

I face many intermediate bashings and insults,
But never get access to final results.

I can get few fans, articles on net,
But never have separate fan websites or wiki page.

I can handle all the wreckage
But can never get the justified footage.

I can (on Domestic Circuit) put many world champions in trouble,
But can never reach at the International level.

I can be the 'Next Best Substitute',
But can never be the 'real dude'.

I can be an event manager,
But can never be a Showstopper.

I can make it to the stage,
But can never get limelight all my age.

In short my composite work is often much more than a 'Hero',
But I am always treated just like a 'Zero'.

Why?

Simple, Because I am a Side Hero!

And also, I can be the second Person to walk on Mars,
But................ :)

Suno

2010-07-29T03:09:00.000-07:00

Kehna kuch chahe mann,
Kaisa hai ye bandhan,
Mann nay hi chun rakhi hai,
Khud ki khamoshiya.

Kaise ho haal baya,
Fiza bhi zalim hai,
Laati teri mehak hai,
Karti rehti shaitaaniya.

Jhumta tera mann jab rawa ho jaaye,
Chowk par aa jaana jab sama ho jaaye.
Baitha hai koi raaho mai,
Thaame apni baichainiya.

Jung zamane sey hai Apno ki suni nahi,
Tujhe apna maana Pooch to khair sahi.
Ak baar to aakey dekh zara,
Sooni meri viraaniya.

Tera wo aanchal ab bhi hai paas mere,
Khaas wo lamhe hai beetey jo saath tere.
Har aahat teri lagti hai,
Har aks lage teri parchhaiya.

वो ज़हन मे जिंदगी जीते रहेंगे!

2010-07-29T03:08:00.001-07:00

Poem I wrote on all (popular) RC Action Super Heroes!

वो ज़हन मे जिंदगी जीते रहेंगे! -

सुनी है रात के अन्धकार मे कुत्तो की गुर्राहट ?
और कब्र पर प्रिंस की कर्कशाहट ?
या दिल्ली की छत के नीचे अपराध की दस्तक ?

महसूस किये है जासूस सर्पो के मानसिक संकेत ?
या सूचना देता कमांडो फोर्स का कैडेट ?

झेला है जंगल मे किसी निर्बल पर अत्याचार ?
या सुनी है किसी अबला की करुण पुकार ?

लिया है राजनगर पुलिस हेडक्वाटर से प्रेषित कोई आर्डर ?
या मिला है रोशन सुरक्षा चक्र के पीछे इंतज़ार करता कमिश्नर ?

जब तक अपराध होते रहेंगे,
पन्नो मे कैद ही सही,
ये सभी किरदार इंसानों मे जिंदा होकर इंसानियत के जज्बे को जागते रहेंगे.

क्यों फेंका कूडे पर?

2010-07-29T02:58:00.000-07:00

मुझको साया दिखा....उसके पीछे रौशनी,
पल मे यूँ गुम गया जैसे था ही वो नहीं,
मुझको छोडा अनजाना सा...बेगाना सा यहाँ,
खुद से मै पूछता मुझको जाना अब कहाँ?

ओ माँ.........
क्यों फेंका कूडे पर....मेरी माँ?
हमम..क्यों फेंका कूडे पर मेरी माँ?

कैसे कर लूँ मै इस बात का यकीन?
आँखें खुली नहीं.... और मै बन गया यतीम.
क्या थी मजबूरी या मुझमे कुछ कमी,
आँचल के बदले क्यों मिली मुझे ज़मी?
आहट हो जब भी तो लगता है यही,
देखे तू मुझको छुप के कहीं...
कबसे तुझको ढूँढता फिर रहा...
देख ना माँ...तेरा मुन्ना अब बड़ा हो गया.
ओ माँ.....
क्यों फेंका कूडे पर....मेरी माँ...!
हमम..क्यों फेंका कूडे पर मेरी माँ?

धुन्दला सा याद है अब तक साया वो तेरा,
आँचल मे क्यों ना दी पनाह?
इतना तो सोचा होता....
नन्ही सी जान और इतना बड़ा जहाँ....
बचपन तो गया...फिर भी वक़्त है थमा....
मुझे बता...ओ माँ....क्यों फेंका कूडे पर मेरी माँ?

Behri Duniya

2010-07-29T02:51:00.000-07:00

Roz ki tarah dhali ek aur raat,
Par iss subah mey thi kuch khaas baat.
Jis baat kay liye Disha kab se rahi thi dino ko gin,
Aaj tha uska College ka pehla din.

Disha kay chehre ki betabi badh rahi thi har pal.
Naye mahaul ko lekar uske zehan mey machi thi halchal.
Disha ki kuch purani saheliyan bhi uske saath thi,
Phir bhi khud mey simti....bolti nazro se.....wo chupchap thi.

Jaise hi unhone uss nayi duniya mey kadam rakha,
Unke mann ki udaan ko kuch aawazo nay rooka.

"Hey.....Hey...New Admission....
Chalo do apna Introduction."

Sabke alawa bas Disha nay jawab nahi diya,
Shayad unke gusse ko issi baat nay saatve aasmaan par laa diya.

"Tum..haan...tum...madam...Jawab do yahan apne ghar kay nakhre mat dikhao,
Kaan pakadkar zameen par baitth jaao.
Waah dekho to iski aankhein kaisi hai bhadki ?
Nazre neechi kar badtameez ladki.
Chalo uttho....sar par mere juttey rakho,
Aur har aane jaane waale ko apna naam bako."

Iss 'duniya' ki shuruat nay hi Disha kay saare sapne churr kar diye,
Disha nay uss 'senior' kay juttey apne sar par rakh liye.
Kaash koi nazar ro rokar behaal Disha ko samajh paati,
Iss ghadi kay kuch pal aur rukne par to jaise Disha toot kar wahin bikhar jaati.

Tabhi sehmi khadi uski saheliyon mey se ek aawaz goonji.

"Iska naam Disha hai.....Wo bol nahi sakti......wo hai goongi."

...Loser....Winner!

2010-07-29T02:47:00.000-07:00

When I was 14 Years Old...

Tortoise is slower,
Faster is Hare,
Everyone admires winner,
Loser...who cares?

Loser is very important,
As without loser,
Winner has no importance.

Losing this time but not any more,
Learning from mistakes...and winning more and more.

March ahead,
Convert labour to bread,
Bear all pains,
To get your aims.

Do your deeds,
and you will surely succeed.
Fight until you get best result,
Fame...instead of insult.

Loss was past,
You are present,
Hard work mixed with high dreams,
Will make your future decent.

Adhurey Armaan

2010-07-29T02:42:00.001-07:00

Major Ranveer Singh seema par yuddh ladd rahe thay aur unki chhoti behan Rajni ki Shaadi ka din aa gaya tha. Unhone apni behan se uski shaadi mey aane ka vaayda kiya tha aur Rajni bhi apni aankhon mey sapne sajaye apne bade bhai jinhe wo pyaar se "Veer ji" bulati thi ka intezaar kar rahi thi aur khushi mey yun hi badbada rahi thi.

Ghar aangan khushi se chehak jaayega,
Shagun khud apni bheeni si mehak utthayega,
Mehendi kuch aisa rang laayegi,
Mere haatho ki rangat hi badal jaayegi.

Veer ji jung mey jald hi jeet ka parcham lehrayenge,
Phir wo apne haatho se meri doli sajayenge.

Khushi ka mahual hoga,
Baja aur Dhol hoga,
Varfer bhi dil khol hoga,
Geeto ka bol hoga,
Dilo ka mol hoga,
Sama wo anmol hoga.

Idhar kitne armaan sajaye Rajni ban rahi thi dulhan,
Kahin door ghat chuka tha apshagun.
Goan mey sabhi thay Major Ranveer ki bahaduri aur jazbe kay mureed,
Jung to unhone jeet li par apne desh kay liye ho gaye wo shaheed.

Rajni ko ye baat samjhane mey har koi gaya haar,
Wo nahi thi iss kadve sach ko maan ne ko tayyar.
Uske zehan mey tha yaadon ka mausam gulzaar,
Wo besudh si phir se gaane lagi apna malhaar.

Bindiya meri lagi chamakne,
Payal meri lagi chhanakne,
Gajra mera laga mehekne,
Chudi meri lagi khanakne,
Saj gaye mere saare gehne.

Khil gaya mera roop shringaar,
Apna ghar lag raha hai paraya pehli baar,
Raunak har taraf chhayi apaar,
Par Veer ji kay bina lage suna saara sansar.
Dekho mera dil naa dukhao,
O, mere bhaiya jaldi aao.

Maa nay samjhaya.
"Pagli, tere bhaiya ab kabhi nahi aayenge."

Rajni tunak kar boli.
Apni behan ko wo aise thode hi rulayenge,
Vaayda kiya hai unhone wo zaroor aayenge.
Meri doli bhi wahi sajayenge.

Shaadi kay ghar mey maatam chhaa gaya,
Jab waha shaheed ka janaza aa gaya.

Rajni -> Tum...sab...sab...chup kyu ho ?
Arre, koi unka swagat to karo.
Maa...maa....tu to kehti thi ki mere bhaiya kabhi nahi aayenge,
Wo to....wo....apne saathiyo ko bhi apne saath mey hai laaye.
Unhone apna vaayda...vaayda poora kiya,
Dekho sab....dekh naa maa....wo dekh,
Mere Veer ji jhande mey lipatkar hai aaye.

Bandey se Bada Desh...

2010-07-29T02:36:00.000-07:00

Ek nayi duniya...ek nayi manzil,
Iss aur kheenche aate hai naa jaane kitne dil.

Ye desh bahut kuch deta,
Kaiyon ki naiya kheta.

Iss samridh sabhyata se anjaan,
Aate hai door - door se mehmaan.

Lekin ab ye desh badla sa hai lagta,
Yahan har koi paise kay peeche bhaagta.

Wo log Bharat ki khaasiyaton ko dekhne aate,
Par nirash hokar apne desh jaate.

Issi tarah kab se paryatak laalchiyon se lut te rahe,
Kya ab apne desh mey Mehmaan...Bhagwaan nahi rahe?

Vatan par lagao naa yun daag,
Anginat kurbaniyon se bani hai 'Hind' ki saakh.

Channd paiso kay liye desh ka sir nahi jhukaya jaata,
Thode faayde kay liye imaan nahi gavaya jaata.

Kadr

2010-07-29T02:34:00.000-07:00

Ye kavita samarpit hai Theater kay mehanti kalakaaro ko, jinki lagan aur mehnat atulniye hai.

Mehnati kalakaaro se bana 'Daksh Theater' tha ussi se aabaad,
Shayad isliye sab usse kehte thay 'Ustad'.

Ye unki mehnat ka hi tha kaam,
Daksh Theater ka saare kasbe mey ho gaya naam.

Sabhi kalakaar kar rahe thay jee jaan se tayyari,
Ab bade shehar mey jo thi unke pehle show ki baari.

Josh se bhari thi theater ki unit saari,
Din raat rehearsals kay daur thay jaari.

Ustad par to jaise sabhi zimmedari ka bojh aa barpa,
Kahin hoti samvaado par characha,
To kahin badhta stage design ka kharcha.

Abhinay, poshak, sangeet ya ho kala,
Lakshya ki aur badha ek ek paksh tha,
Ye theater wakai 'Daksh' tha.

Natak kay manchan ka din bhi aaya,
Pehla drashya sunane kay liye manch par Ustad nay bhav banaya,
Par naa jaane kya dekhkar wo kuch bol nahi paaya.

Peeche se saathiyo ki awazein aane lagi.

"Ustad, kuch bolo, kya ho gaya ?"

Ustad - Kiske liye bolun...dosto, humey koi dekhne nahi aaya.

Haq

2010-07-29T02:33:00.001-07:00

Aaj sahab ko jaldi tha ghar jaana,
Apni patni ko film dikhane jo tha le jaana.

"Ye le 2 Rupaye."

"Saab, par polish kay 5 Rupaye hai padte."

"Abe, mujhe mat samjha...chal hat aage jaa."

Apni pareshaaniyon ko bhulane,
Sahab apni sangini ko lekar pahuche film dikhane.

"Sahab, Parking ka paisa."

"Mai hun staff ka jaan ne waala."

"Sahab lekin ye stand....."

"Chup kar,
Ek Car khadi ki hai,
Nahi karaya koi Plane land.
Lagta hai tere officer se shikayat karni padegi,
Tabhi teri boli rukegi."

"Hum movie shuru honay se pehle aa gaye,
Khaali samay kaise bitaye."

"Mere pait mey to chuhe kood aaye,
Chalo kuch khaya jaaye."

Haatho mey haath liye dono Restaurant mey aaye.

"Ji, sir, bataiye kya karun
seva?"

"Aaj kuch
alag....ammmm....ek large Pizza."

"Sir, with extra cheese Rs. 450 and without extra cheese Rs. 375 ka hoga."

"With extra cheese..."

(patni ki aur dekh kar) "Jab tum ho saath to inn rupayo ki kya bisaat?"

Sahab, aapko shayad andaza nahi,
Iss extra cheese nay kitne logo ka haq aur kitne gharo ki roti chheen li.

उसे जाने दो!

2010-07-29T02:31:00.001-07:00

Real Men are not eve teasers!

उसने तुम्हे रास्ते मे नही रोका,
अपनी आंखों को नही सेका.
घूर कर तुम्हे नही देखा.

उसने सही अपनी बेईज्ज़ती,
सुनी तुम्हारी ना जाने कितनी ही फब्ती.

उसने नज़रो को हमेशा ज़मीन पर टिकाया,
सर तक को दुप्पटे से छुपाया.....और अगर नही भी छुपाया,
तुमने उसे हाथ क्यों लगाया?

उसे लड़की होने का सलीका पसंद है,
वो तुम्हारे लिए नही सजती.
वो कैसी दिखती या लगती है...वो ख़ुद अच्छे से है जानती,
उसने अपने बारे मे तुमसे राय नही मांगी.

तुम्हारे भी अपने होंगे,
अपनी ज़िम्मेदारी संभालो.
नुक्कड़, गलियां.....मत बिगाडो...
उस लड़की को जाने दो.

Giri Hui Masti

2010-07-29T02:29:00.001-07:00

Kaun hai wo 'chhote' log ?
Bematlab zindagi jee rahe majdoor,
Kya galat kiya 'sahab' nay jo unhe apni gaadi se kuchal diya ?
Apne sahab to anjaan thay bechaare nashe mey majboor.

Aur bhala sahab nay aaj tak kisi ka bura kiya hai ?
Jaake dekho unn majdooro kay gharo mey laakho rupya pahuncha diya hai.
Phir bhi hai ye zalim zindgani,
Kuch 'hearings' tak to masoom sahab ko court ki aupchariktaayein hai nibhani.
Gavaah to apni jaib mey hai,
Par ye NGOs, Human Rights aur Media hai bahut badi pareshaani.

Itne jhanjhato kay baad bhi sahab ki kadr karta hai ye zamana.
Oh, baaton baaton mey bhool hi gaya.....
.....aaj to sahab ko phir se late night party mey hai jaana.

The End!

kuch logo ka thoda sa mazaa kabhi kisi ki zindagi ki barabari nahi kar sakta par asal zindagi mey aesa hota hai. Mai chahta hun ki aap sab apni zindagi mey khoob tarakki karein par jahan bhi pahunche 'insaan' hi bane rahe aur doosro kay jeevan ka mulya samjhe.

Stampede....Ruko!

2010-07-29T02:27:00.000-07:00

Stampede yaani Bhagdud jo zyadatar kisi chhoti baat ya afvaah se bhayankar roop lekar kai logo ki jaan leel leti hai hai. Aisi baatein oochhe maksado kay liye jaan boojh kar bhi ki jaati hai. Iss baar aap logo se koi guzarish nahi hai kyoki mai jaanta hun ki yahan sabhi saaf dil kay hai......bas itna kahunga ki kisi afvaah ko khud se guzar kar doosro tak mat pahunchne dijiye.

Stampede -

Dekho kisi kay jigar ka tukda chhina,
Dekho koi bejaan bana,
Dekho ye manzar...dabi, kuchli laasho se sana.

Suno ye cheekh pukaar,
Apno kay liye apno ki cheetkaar,
Sungho khoon ki sadandh,
Gino kitni laashein gaye tum laangh.

Phhod do bombs.....ya faila do afvaah,
Kahan jaati hai yumhari ye raah?

Dekh wo parivaar,
Jiska har sadasya gaya zindagi haar,
Uss loothade ko dekh,
Wo tha ek bachcha pyara,
Jiski maa nay usse abhi tak apni godd se nahi tha utara,

Apne matlab kay liye koi inn laashon se aankhein saik raha,
Hai kya koi jo ye sab dekh raha?

Koi dekhta kyu nahi?
Koi sunta kyu nahi?
Koi mehsoos kyu nahi karta?
.....Koi kuch karta kyu nahi?

Rozi Roti

2010-07-29T02:25:00.000-07:00

Station par Train ka intezaar karta bheed ka ek jattha.

"Hello, sir aap MNC kay H.R. department mey hai naa."

"Hello, ji haan, par maine aapko nahi pehchana."

"Sir, aapki company mey mujhe job mil jaati.....ussi kay liye tha aapse milna.
Sir maine achchhe marks se B. Tech. hai kiya,
Ek chhoti firm mey 1 saal ka experience bhi liya.
Aur Computer mey bhi kiya ek Diploma.
Ye sab baatein aapki Company ki eligibility se hai milti,
Kya mujhe aapki company mey job milegi."

"Tumne poori mehnat ki,
Lekin tab bhi 'yahan' naukri aese nahi mil jaati,
Mere office mey aesi 500 applications roz hai aati."

Nazarband

2010-07-29T02:23:00.000-07:00

Marr gayi har tamanna,
Dab gayi har ichchha,
Jab udne ki hui chahat,
Bandishon nay di dastak.

Jab honay lage ladki jawaan,
Shaadi se rook diya jaata hai uske armaano ka kaarwan.
Humare samaj ki ye kaisi reet bani ?
Kya ladki ki apni nahi koi zindagi ?

"Par buraai kya hai,
Ladka achchha to hai."

Arre, virasat kay peheredaaro,
Jalan kay maare rishteydaaro.
'Usse' ek mauka to diya jaaye.
Shayad ye ladki uss achchhe ladke se behtar kar dikhaye.

"Ladkiyon ko bandishon mey rehna chahiye,
Ladki to hai dhan paraya."
Dahej, utpeedan aur nari ko dabane kay liye,
Aisi baaton ka sadiyon se liya jaata raha hai sahara.

Jab apne desh kay "Aadhe Hisse" ko uska sahi haq mil jaayega,
Tab ye desh sahi maayno mey saare jahan se achchha ban jaayega.

Country Calling!

2010-07-29T02:20:00.000-07:00

Lagta har manzar maraa,
Mera koi bhai door kahin tadap raha,
Kisi koney mey kisi nay fhir se zulm saha,
Kahin koi masoom anath hua.

Shayad kisi bande ki poori naa ho saki dua,
Koi haara zindagi ka jua.

Apno kay liye fhir koi bilkha...roya,
Intezaar mey jaane waale kay...fhir koi raat bhar nahi soya,
Kisi nay kaleje ka tukda khoya,
Fhir kisi kay kapdo ko 'Laal' rang nay dhoya.

Apne kuch vaasiyon ki harkato se hua aahat,
Apna hi desh Bharat.

Badh gayi siskiyan marre bachcho ki jagah pal pal kay,
Kahin cheekhein ubli....kahin aansu chhalke,
Jawa raha maatam har shaam dhalte dhalte.

Pehle to zakhm ki tees chhubti thi,
Dard apna ho gaya ab nasoor palte palte.

Mera desh jal raha hai,
Mai chup nahi baith sakta,
Mujhe jaana hai,
Mai apne desh ko marrte huey nahi dekh sakta.

Sirf 700 Rupaye

2010-07-29T02:16:00.000-07:00

Sapno ka shehar Mumbai jaha kai log apni taqdeer....apna naam banane aate hai ussi bheed mey tha ek Raja apne shehar se Mumbai kuch bada karne aaya tha.Stunt Man kay roop mey pehchan banane kay liye uska sangarsh jaari tha.Ghar se door bas yaha uska ek apna tha......uska jigri dost Romeo jo Bollywood Films mey lighting ka kaam karta tha aur jo aaj kuch zyada hi khush tha.

"Hey, Raja,
Baj gaya tera baja,
Kya re tapori,
Teri to nikal padi.
Ab chhod ye rajai,
Utth bhi jaa mere Bhai."

Raja - Yaar,tu itni sabere kaai ko aaya ?

Romeo - Kisi bade banner ka kaam hai aaya,
Stunt Master tere ko abhich bulaya.
Bas tu ek baar inn bade logo ki nazaro mey aa jaaye,
Tab to apna Raja kisi kay haath naa aaye.
Starting hoegi to kum paisa milega,
Pun baad mey to tu noto mey khelega.
Abi ka to tu stunt ka 500 samajh,
Aur 200 Rupalli Medical.....badi party ka bada magaj.
Master jaisa bole waisaich karne ka.

Raja - Fokat tension kaai ko....apun ko darr nahi hai marne ka.

Romeo - Aye.....Raja paisa khoob kamana,
Pun yaar dosto ko bhool mat jaana.

Dono ki khushi ka nahi tha thhikana,
Muskurakar dono huey ravana.

Romeo - Saab,ye naya ladka,Raja.
Oye Punter andar aaja.

Director - Dekho Raja,Bahut hi khatarnaak stunt ki hai shooting.

Romeo - Bas kya saab,apne Raja mey bhi hai bahut daring.

Director - Car ko iss track se uss track par hai kudana,
Ab bhi bata do,kya tum chahte ho iss stunt ko nibhana ?

Raja - Saab,Apun se judde bahut se sapno ko haquiqat hai banana,
Apno kay liye kisi ko bhi aa jaata hai jaan ki baazi lagana.

Iss junoon ko to safalta gayi mil,
Raja jeet gaya par ho gaya chotil.

Zindagi ka ye shot bhi "Okay" kar Raja nay Rs. 700 liye,
Raja aur Romeo ab Doctor kay paas chal diye.
Marhampatti karvakar Raja nay poocha,

"Doctor Saab, kitne paise huey ?"

Doctor - Zyada nahi............sirf 700 Rupaye.

Saathiyo,Kitne hi aise log hai jo jitni mehnat karte hai uska bahut kum hissa unhe milta hai ya kabhi-kabhi wo bhi nahi.Dukh ki baat ye hai ki iss duniya mey aise kai log safal hai jo doosro ki mehnat ko apna naam dete hai.Raja to bas ek udharan tha.........aisi karodo partibhaayein jo iss duniya kay taur tareko kay neeche dabb kar reh gayi.To agli baar kisi kaam ko aap sarahe to ye jaan lein ki wo kiski mehnat ya kaam ka natija hai.

Kuch dino baad ->

Raja aur Romeo pehli baar Balcony mey baitthkar uss film ka 70 mm kay parde par maza uttha rahe thay,

"Hero" kay Stunts par logo ki taaliyan aur shabd Raja ko bahut sukoon pahuncha.

Bas itna jaan na chahta hun ki wo din kab aayega,

Jab uss Hero ki jagah Romeo ka Raja paayega.

पाक 'महान'

2010-07-29T02:14:00.000-07:00

Pakistan hai mahaan,
Mazhab to hai islaam,
Manavta ka nahi hai naamo-nishaan.
Jab dekho dauda diye,
Seema par Dus-Baarah pathaan.

Pak ka hai bas ak kaam,
Bahar se khareedkar bum,
Bharat ki khopadi par,
Tan tana tan tan.

America ki bhi ajeeb dhun hai,
Osama-Umar Pakistan mey hai,
Phir bhi dhoondhne mey magan hai.

Daadi badhakar bane hai jehadi,
Ak hi missile sey ho jayegi "Aapki" fauj aadhi.

Kashmeer kay batvaare mey chahte hai,
Teesre desh ka hastakshep,
Bhaiya ye Kashmeer hai Kashmeer,
Naa ki koi Birthday cake.

Kashmeer par ab bhi karna chahte hai samvaad,
Itna Pakistan mil gaya pehle uska kejiye dhanyavaad.

Bharat kar raha hai Vikas aur har din nayi-nayi khoj,
Pakistan iss dharti par hai ak bahut bada bhoj.

Kargil ki haar kay baad bhi mooh banate hai,
Bhagaye huey bhikhari baar-baar maangne chale aate hai.

Jazba

2010-07-29T02:11:00.000-07:00

Tribute to great Indian athlete P.T. Usha.

Ye kavita samarpit hai Bharat kay mahaan athletes mey se ek P.T. Usha ji par.

Uss bachchi mey tha kuch khaas,
Tezi ka hunar tha uske paas.
Uski issi khasiyat ko pehchan mili,
Samay kay saath wo nanhi pratibha,
Ek kushal dhavika kay roop mey khili.

Khud par saare desh ka vishvaas usne tootne naa diya,
Kai antarrashtriya pratispardhao mey Bharat ka sar unncha kiya.
Apne desh ka samman badhane ka usne prann liya,
Bharat ki jholi ko padako se bhar diya.

1984, Los Angeles Olympics. (Women 400 metres, Hurdels) ->

Har pratispardha ki tarah Olympics mey bhi thi poore Bharat ko thi gaurav ki aasha,
Har uss aasha ko poora karne kay liye jee jaan se daud rahi thi Usha.

Pehle se hi sabko 'swarna' ki umeed thi jaagi,
Kyoki Practice Sessions aur Semi Finals mey bhi wo udanpari sabse tez thi bhaagi.

Par wo sabhi umeedien tooti,
Daud kay antim palo mey Usha chuki.
Uss waqt kismat ko thoda sa samman bhi nahi tha manzoor,
Jaanch kay baad bataya gaya ki Kansya kay liye Usha 1 second kay 100ve hisse se reh gayi door.
Nirash Bharat nay iss pal ko kuch aise jiya,
Iss 1 second kay 100ve hisse ko Bharat ka sabse lamba lamha bana diya.
Pehle ki tarah iss Olympic kay baad bhi Usha ko milti rahi safalta,
Bas Olympic ka padak reh gaya unke liye sapna.

Phir bhi Usha nay nahi maani hai haar,
Aaj bhi kheenchta hai unhe iss desh ka pyaar.
Isliye wo khud Usha School of Athletics mey prashikshan dekar kai pratibhao ko rahi hai nikhaar.

Usha ko aasha hai ki aane waale samay mey Bharat itni safaltaayein paayega,
Har koi 1984 kay uss adhure pal ko bhool jaayega.
Apni zindagi kar di iss desh kay naam,
Usha aapke iss jazbe ko salaam.

The End!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Team event Hockey ko chhodkar Bharat vishva kay sarvashestra khel 'Olympics' mey zyada safaltayein nahi paa saka hai. Aazadi kay baad Bharat nay individual events mey ab tak (2004 Athens Olympics tak) keval 4 padak argit kiye hai. P.T. Usha ji ki hi tarah 1960 kay Rome Olympics mey Milkha Singh ji bhi 400 metres mey Bronze Medal, 1/100 second se haare thay. Wo shuruat mey sabse aage daud rahe thay par unki miscalculation kay karan wo beech raaste mey dheeme ho gaye aur jab unhe apni iss galti ka ehsaas hua tab tak dair ho chuki thi. Haal hi mey huey Athens Olympics mey Mens Doubles kay swarna padak ki daavedar Mahesh Bhupati aur Leander paes ki jodi Semi Finals mey durbhagyapoorna tareke se haar gayi par phir bhi unhone Bronze Medal kay liye 4+ Ghanto ka behoshi ki hadd tak pahunchane waala match khela. Aakhir mey Mahesh ko court par hatash baitha dekhkar bahut dukh hua par unke effort par garv bhi ho raha tha.

Aise aur bhi bahut vaakye hai jab Bhartiye khiladi qualifying rounds mey annk talika mey sabse upar rehkar baad mey kinhi kaaranvash aage nahi badh paaye. Itni kum suvidhaaon kay saath waha tak pahunchna aur itna badhiya pradarshan karna bahut badi baat hai.

Iss tasveer ka sukhad pehlu ye hai ki ab Bharat mey buniyaadi khel dhaanche mey bahut sudhaar hua hai. Saath hi ab khelo kay prati logo ka nazariya badalne laga hai aur ab pehle ki tulna mey kai guna zyada log khelo ko apni kamaai ka zariya banane lage hai. Bharat kay udhoy gharane bhi yuva pratibhao ki madad ko aage aaye hai. Bhartiye sena apne "Mission Olympics" kay tehat jagah-jagah pratibhavan sainiko aur nagriko ko aadhunik suvidhaaon kay saath kai kheloka prashikshan de rahi hai. Milkha Singh ji kay bete Jeev Milkha Singh ab vishva vikhyat Golfer ban chukein hai. Aane waale samay mey Bharat vishva khel pridrashya mey bhi apni alag pehchan zaroor banayega.

The True Worth

2010-07-29T02:09:00.000-07:00

People say Natural beauty is ultimate,
Then why they show-off and make themselves over-rate.

Almost Everyone wants to look distinctive,
Mother Nature did that already,
No two individuals are identitive. (Thanks to DNA, Fingerprinting, etc.)

Showing off is a matter of time,
one acquires extra wealth and his shoes get extra shine.

We should direct ourselves in achieving social objectives,
Which makes a person 'forever' distinctive.

'Challenged' and not so fortunate people also reside on this earth,
....Better than showing off temporary worth.

Bachpan

2010-07-29T02:08:00.001-07:00

Wo mannd subah,
Kirne paavan,
Wo daud bhaag,
Komal bachpan,
Wo tutlana,
Wo ghabrana,
Maa kay aanchal mai chip jaana.
Wo haasna,
Wo roona,
Sabse pehle khakar sona.
Wo pagdandi,
Wo raasta,
Chinta se koi na vaasta.
Wo lambe dag,
Wo nanhe paav,
Wo dhoop-chav,
Kagaz ki naav.
Wo galat-galat gaane gaana,
Wo bade-bado se sharmana,
Apni cheezo par itranaa.
Ab jeevan mai ak hi kami hai,
Mere jeevan mai bachpan nahi hai.

Brij Magan

2010-07-29T02:04:00.000-07:00

Saathiyo, iss kavita mey brij ki bhasha ka prayog kar kuch naya karne ki kosish ki hai. Ab aap log bataiye ki ye kosish kahan tak safal rahi. Bhagwan Krishna brij chhod kar apne kartavya path par nikal chuke hai par saara Brij apne Kanha kay waapas aane ki raah dekh raha hai.

Baba baithey aas lagave,
Maiya ka aanchal bulave,
Kahin se nanha natkhat aa jaave,
Daau bhaiya kohau saath mey laave.

Panghat pey paniya bharan,
Gopiyo sang Radha magan,
Raah taki mey hai lagan,
Mann mey hai Shyam agan.

Chhaliya naa hovey paas,
Ki se rachave raas ?
Gwalan sab huin laas,
Gaiyan kum charan gaas.

Gaave sab Kisan gun,
Suun sab bin murli dhun.

Rann ko ab chhod dei,
Mann ko fir jodd lei.
Matki fir todd dei,
Maakhan fir choor lei.

Aa jaao Nandlaal,
Chanchal Giridhar Gopal,
Taki brij sang gopi gwal.

Natkhat hatt chhod Shyam,
Araj kare ye brijdham.
Taaro sabhan ka jeevan,
Darshan dei do Bhagwan.

शहीद

2010-07-29T02:02:00.000-07:00

थामना चाहता था मै झंडा मरते दम,
पर रुक गया मै खुद को समझाकर,
तिरंगे का रंग न बदल जाए,
मेरे लहू से सुर्ख होकर.

मेरी माँ के पास मत ले जाना मेरे ताबूत को,
कुदरत की बंदिशे धरी रह जायेंगी,
माँ के छूने भर से ही लाश मे जान आ जायेगी.

पिता जी को संभाल लेना क्योकि उन्होंने ही अब तक हम सबको संभाला,
मै उनका क़र्ज़ चुका नहीं पाया...पर उन्होंने ही देश के आगे सब कुछ लुटाना है सिखाया.

...अपनी संगिनी को भी संदेश देना हूँ चाहता...

तुम्हारा साथ देने का वायदा,
मै मर कर भी नहीं भूल पाऊंगा
इस जन्म की वफ़ा को मै आठवा जन्म लेकर निभाऊंगा.

"Sonia ne Aatmhatya kar li, Inspector Sahab!!"

2010-07-29T02:00:00.000-07:00

Sonia naam ki ak ladki ki kuch hi mahino pehle shaadi hui thi. Uske Pita nay apna sab kuch iss shaadi mey laga diya tha aur Dahej ki maange poori karne kay liye wo karze mai bahut buri tarah doob gaye thay. Sonia kay Lalchi sasuraal waalo ki maange badhti jaa rahi thi aur isliye wo log roz Sonia ko pratadit bhi kartey thay. Sonia ye zulm chup-chap seh leti thi aur apne Papa se hamesha haanskar baat karti thi. Lekin aaj ka din shayad kuch alag hi tha...

Kuch hi samay pehle ki thi usney ki apne ghar ki dehleez paar,
Didi, Maa ji, Pita ji aur Dev, ab yahi ban gaye uska naya sansaar.

SONIA - "Arrey, aap sab log yaha rasoi mey,
Ab se dhyaan rakhungi,
Abhi nahi bana hai khana,
Kal sey aap sabko nahi padega yaha aana."

Dev - "Babu ji aap bahar nazar rakhiye,
Didi maachis le lo,
Maa, jaldi isspar mitti ka tail daalo."

"Dev, pehle iske haath to pakad lo."

AVAAK REH GAYI SONIA,
JAB USNE YEH SAB SUNA,
TOOT GAYA HAR SAPNA USKA,
JO USNE AB TAK THA BUNA.

ABHI TO DIL KAY KAI ARMAAN JAWAA THAY,
PAR JINKO USNE APNA MAANA WO USKE APNE KAHA THAY?

SONIA -

"T.V., Transistor ki aawaz kum kar do....Didi,
Mai bilkul nahi chilaaungi,
Haaste huey iss ghar mai aayi thi,
Haaste huey hi jaungi.

Mai to pehle hi marr chuki hun Babu ji,
Ab iss shareer ko jalta dekhne kaun aayega?
Aap bhi sabhi ki madad kejiye,
Aap se achchha inka haath aur kaun batayega?

Maa ji, aap kehti to mai khushi se jaan de deti,
Phir ye khel kyu racha hai,
Mere Shareer kay saath meri aatma ko bhi jalana hai,
Kya aur mitti ka tail bacha hai?

Dev, tumhe to maine apna Bhagwaan maana,
Apne Bhagwaan ki yeh lila bhi dekh lungi,
Aaj khud ko jalta dekhkar hi apni aankhein saik lungi.

Aaahhh...Dev.......aaj to mere bhagya bahut acche hai,
Marte waqt bhi tumne mere haath thaam rakhe hai.

Roshan raha humara pyaar,
Nahi hua yeh kabhi kaala,
Dekho aaj tumhare pyaar nay,
Mujhe hi maar daala.

Bas ak Vinti hai,
Ho sake to maan jaana,
Mere Papa ko unki Beti kay marne ki
asli "Wajah" kabhi mat batana."

Meera ko bhi Kanha de do!

2010-07-29T01:58:00.000-07:00

Liye sang santan,
Din raat magan,
Karti wo bhajan,
Lagi Krishna lagan.

Kiya Rajasthan paavan,
Kiya murat se milan,
Taare kaiyon kay janam,
Saadha Shyam se sangam.

Toode kul kay bandhan,
Rana ji ko hui jalan,
Sahi usne agan,
Kiya vish ko amrit bina manthan.

Jisko nadi nahi saki duba,
Shehenshah Akbar nay kiya jiska sajda,
Usko har ghadi apno kay taano, dutkaaro mey pada pisna,
Par Mira ka to jaise Krishna mey tha sansaar aur sansaar mey tha Krishna.

Rukmini ji, itni vinti sun lo,
Mira ko bhi Kanha de do.

"...Aur Humney Usko Patharon se Maara!"

2010-07-29T01:55:00.000-07:00

"Hello, Agra Fire Service Station."

"Hello....Yahan....Shahganj elake mey Transit building mey aag lag gayi hai, jaldi Fire Van bhejiye."

Siren bajati aage badh rahi thi Fire Van,
Har guzarte pal kay saath lutt raha tha usme baithe Vikal ka chainn.
Transit Building waalo par jaise grahan lag tha gaya,
Unki umeed ka akmatr sahara traffic jam mey tha fasa.
Vyakul Vikal sadak par utar aaya,
Chillakar usne raasta banana chaha,
Par badkismati kisi ko raasta nahi deti,
Itni si baat wo bechara samajh nahi paaya.
Aakhir Van ko raasta mila,
Apni manzil par pahunchne par Vikal aur uske saathiyo ko mila unki kosisho ka sila.

Par ye santosh kay pal tham gaye thay,
Fire Van par aakroshit bheed kay pathar pad rahe thay.
Vikal nay yeh khoon ka ghoont bhi piya,
'Madadgaaro' ko hi niyati ka pathar aisa laga,
Bahar kay zakhmo ki chinta kise thi,
Dard to andar lagi chot nay diya.
Aakhirkar, Transit Building ki cheekho nay,
Bheed kay patharo ko rook liya.

Doosro kay liye bhool gaye ye Vardiwaale apne zakhmo se hui pareshaani,
Transit Building par ab baras raha tha paani,
Kuch dair ko aisa laga jaise iss paani se jald dhul jayege saare gam,
Par bereham takdeer nay phir dhaaya sitam,
Fire Van ka paani ho gaya khatm.

Aur Madad aane mey abhi samay lagta,
Par logo ko jalta hua Vikal kaise dekhta,
Building ki aur badhte huey Vikal par Pathar, gaaliya aur taane baras rahe thay,
Vikal kay haath andaar fhasey logo ko bachane ko taras rahe thay.

Vikal kay sahaas nay saathiyo mey josh bhar diya,
Kuch hi dair mey inn jabaazo nay lagbhag sabhi logo ko bacha liya.

Aag phir se bheeshan ho rahi thi,

Tabhi bheed mey se aawaz aayi ->
"Meri bachchi yahan hai nahi,
kahin wo andar to nahi reh gayi."

Wahan maujood itney logo mey jaise ye vakya sirf Vikal kay kaano mey pada,
Badhavaas sa wo phir building ki taraf daud pada.

Uff.....Pad gaya manhoosiyet ka saaya,
Phir Transit building se koi bahar nahi aaya.

Kisi nay bhi ummeed chhodi nahi,
Intezaar mey sabki aankhein pathar ban gayi.
Aur tab to sabki zubaan jaise sil hi gayi,
Jis bachchi kay liye Vikal andaar gaya tha wo bheed mey hi mil gayi.

Thodi dair baad ->

"Hello.....Sir, Aag par kabu paa liya gaya hai.Iss ghatna mey koi nagrik nahi maara gaya hai."

"Nagrik......you mean kya koi Fire Constable maara gaya hai?"

"Nahi sir....aapne galat kaha.......
EK FIRE CONSTABLE SHAHEED HO GAYA HAI."

'Wo' Din Kab Aayega?

2010-07-29T01:54:00.001-07:00

Dango ki aag mey shehar dehak raha tha,
Har gali mey bikhra khoon mehak raha tha.
Darr se har koi tha sehma,
Bahar se accha lag raha tha iss ghut tey kamre mey rehna.

Har kisi ko thi yahi aasha,
Sab de rahe thay ak-doosre ko yahi dilasa,
Ki ab ye bura waqt aur nahi thehar payega,
Sab kuch pehle jaisa ho jayega.

Phir bhi naa jaane kyu darr raha tha sabka mann,
Tabhi jaani-pehchani cheekho nay paida kar di sabme sirhan.
Bahar jhankhar dekha to laga jaise unki kismat gayi lut,
Dono gharo kay nanhe chiraag Ram, Raheem gaye thay peeche chhut.

Iss gali mey har jagah bikhra tha surkh rang,
Do nanhi jaan aur daav par laga rahi thi ye jung.

Darindey Ram,Raheem kay peeche aa rahe thay,
Andaar dono ghar kay log badhavaas hokar chilla rahe thay.
Jab haivaan masoomo ko zakhm dene lage,
Tadapte Ram aur Raheem ko dekh ruk naa sake unke sage.

Ab sadak par phir do guto mey thi jung,
Dehshat aur Zindagi kay maksad kay sang.
Dono gharo kay Pita, Maa, Behan aur Bhai,
Ladd rahe thay zindagi ki ladai.

Yahan bhi Darinde baazi maar gaye,
Zindagi kay liye ladne waale........Zindagi haar gaye.

Police Siren nay jaise Farishtey ka kaam kiya,
Dono masoomo ko bacha liya gaya.

Darinde kisi aur gali ka gala raitney,
Koi aur aashiyana jalane aage badh chale.
Apno ko utthane ki nakaam kosisho sey
Rundh gaye thay unn dono kay gale.

Ab tak aabaad inn aashiyano ki takdeer jaise soo gayi thi,
Aaj beech sadak par masoomo kay saath insaniyat bhi roo rahi thi.

YE VAADA RAHA KI APNE VATAN KAY LIYE KUCH AISA KARUNGA,
AB SE KISI RAM,RAHEEM KO AISE RONAY NAHI DUNGA.

HAAN......BAHUT RONA AATA HAI,
JAB DESH KO KHILONA SAMJHA JAATA HAI.

AB TO BAS YAHI DUA HAI,
KI JAB AISE RAM, RAHEEM BADE HO JAYENGE,
TO EK AISA DESH BANAYENGE,
JAHAN SAB MILKAR SUKOON SE REH PAYENGE.

Inquilab Zindabad

2010-07-29T01:52:00.000-07:00

8 April,1929

Batukeshvar Dutt -
Ak baar phir soch lo Bhagat,
Humare iss Garam Rukh par poora desh kya kahega

Bhagat Singh -
Lala ji nay ahinsa se "Simon Waapas Jaao" ka diya tha naara,
Phir bhi Angrezo nay unhe barbarta se maara.
Atyachar badhta rahega,
Lala ji jaisa har pujniye marta rahega,
Jaise pehle tha ab bhi ye desh chhup hi rahega.

Sukhdev -
Par Bhagat Lala ji kay hatyare Sauders ko maarkar,
Jo sandesh hum sab nay failana chaha,
Wo kisi ki samajh mey nahi aaya,
Iss desh kay liye hi to dil mey har waqt aag dhadhakti hai,
Aur yaha ki aam janta ab bhi humey aatanki samajhti hai.

Bhagat Singh -
Hume apne naamo par lage iss kalank ko Lala ji kay ahinsak tareke se hi hai mitana,
Bina kisi ko maare ak bomb kay dhamake se Inquilab Zindabad ka naara har jagah hai gunjana.

Kya tum Tayyar ho Batukeshvar?

Batukeshvar Dutt -
Bhagatey, Mai bhi tera hi to saaya hun,
Bharat Maa kay liye apni maa ki kookh se tayyar hokar aaya hun.

Chandrasekhar Azad -
Par Bhagat, tumhare saath hum ye khatra nahi lenge,
Aisa karne par hum tumhe kho denge.

Bhagat Singh -
"Hindustan Socialist Republican Association" aur "Naujawan Sabha" ko ab aap sab ko hi hai sambhalna,
Iss Bhagat ki kya bisaat hai
Unke zariye Hindustan kay har shakhs ko Bhagat Singh ki tarah hai dhaalna.

Phir Central Assembly mey hua jo visfhoot,
Hil gaya British Samrajya aisi thi jiski chot.
Bereham waqt aisa bhi aaya,
Kai Krativeer saathiyo ko Jail ki bandisho mey jald hi milvaya.

Nahi bhoolti 23 March, 1931, ki wo taareekh,
Jab waqt khud se hi ruk jaane ki maang raha tha bheekh.
Naye Bharat kay uday ki kahani tabhi ho gayi thi shuru,
Jab Bharat Maa kay aanchal mey gehri neend so gaye Bhagat Singh,Sukhdev aur Rajguru.

Ye din balidaano se bhare thay,
Kuch din pehle hi,
Ghulam desh mey "Azad" jeene waale Chandrasekhar Azad......"Azad" hi mare thay.
Har Dil ko saal rahi thi yahi ek gila,
Alfred Park mey "Pandit ji" kay honay ki khabar dene par 30,000 chaandi kay sikko ka inaam kis gaddaar ko mila?

Bachaane ko desh ki aan,
Diye gaye hai aise anginat balidaan.

Jiski Azadi kay liye bhet chadha khoon itna.
Kya aisa Bharat tha unn Shaheedo ka sapna
Ab hum sab ko Shaheedo kay dikhaye raaste par jaana hai,
Aur unke sapno jaisa ek naya Bharat banana hai.
Unka balidaan rahega naa yaad?
To naye Bharat ko banane kay liye ak baar phir se boliye......
.........INQUILAB ZINDABAD.

Haan, Maine kaha,
INQUILAB ZINDABAD.

"Amara Last Wish Poora ho Gaya!!"

2010-07-29T01:47:00.000-07:00

Poem written in Hindi-Parsi accent.

Linda Kursiwala Goa mey rehti thi jinke pati kai saal pehle mar chuke thay unka sahara tha unka beta Victor Kursiwala. Par 6 mahine pehle hi Victor bhi achanak gayab ho gaya......koi kehta tha ki wo bhi mar gaya, koi kehta tha ki pagal ho gaya, koi kehta tha ki wo kisi aur jagah reh raha hai.....logo ki baatein khatm nahi hoti thi.....par Linda Kursiwala jinhe sab Linda Aunty kay naam se jaante hai jis kisi se bhi milti thi usko bas yahi kahani sunati thi.

Aye hai uska Photo,
Amara Victor jidhar ko bhi chalta,
Girls pagalo ki maafik usko dekhne ko nikalta.
Handsome, joshila ni dimaag se thoda sa sick,
Ditto uske pappa ki maafik.

Childhood se hi tha O sayana,
Pappa ki death kay baad se,
Har zimmedari ko usne khud hi sambhala.
Amara chhota bakery ko saara din deta,
Bacha hua time mey colony mey Tutions leta.

Amare ko karta itna pyaar,
Roz itna saara kiss leta aur kehta,
"Utar raha hun aapke diye pyaar ka udhaar."

Peechla Christmas mayne usse itna rooka par,
Tab ko bhi bada restaurant mey amara saath kiya O Dinner.

May poocha ->

"Tere ko girlfriend nahi hai kya ?
ya tere ke dimaag mey bhar gaya hai gobar."

O Bola ->

"Jab sabse beautiful aurat humare saath hai,
tab Goa ki saari ladkiyaan gayi hai mere liye mar."

Dheekra, Naa jaane kab thakta,
Itna saara saal Late night tak kuch naa kuch likhta.
Usme koi jaadu tha,
uska prose aur poetry par to saara locals fida tha.

1 baar usne apne saare notes aur work ko 1 publisher ko diya,
Unko padhkar publisher uss sab ko print kar Victor ko bahut paisa dene ka promise kiya.

Victor O day khushi se bola,
"Ab saari mushkilein door ho jaayengi,
Aapko har wo cheez milegi jo aap chahengi."

Usko tease karne kay vaaste may bola,
"Amara wish list bahut lamba hai tum nahi jaanta,
Abhi kay liye amko Gao mey bada sa mansion maangta."

O bola,

"Bas, jaan bhi de deta agar aap wo bhi.....'maangta'."

1 din O bahut upset hokar ghar aaya,
Apna saath bahut books laaya.
About dozen books amko thama diya,
Rotay huey bola...uske saalo kay work par kisi aur nay fame aur profit kama liya.

Apna head pakadkar O idhar-udhar bhaga,
Itna helpless maine kabhi nahi dekha apna Baba.
Printing Mistake hoega bolke usse console kiya,
Phir publisher se baat karne kay vaaste chala gaya.

Tabi se six month honay ko aaya,
Abi tak O waapas nahi aaya.
O faaltu ka pain liya,
Am to jaanta hai saara mehnat usne kiya.
O dheekra itna bhi nahi jaanta,
Uska mama ko koi wish nahi bas apna Victor waapas maangta.
Mayra last wish mere ko do dila,
Amare dheekra se amko do mila.

Bete ki waapsi ki raah dekhti Linda Kursiwala ki maansik haalat bigadti gayi aur aakhirkar unhe sarkari maansik aspatal mey bharti karvaya gaya. Unhe Ward Number 14 mey jagah di gayi aur sanyog se unki 'last wish' poori ho gayi kyoki Ward Number 13 unka beta Victor bharti tha.Ye dono wards lohay ki jaali se vibhajit thay. Aaj bhi Maa Bete jaali se chipak kar har waqt ak doosre se baat karte rehte hai......aur jo koi bhi inn wards kay paas unn dono ki baatein sunkar thodi dair thithak jaata hai wo apne aansu rook nahi paata hai.

Matlabi Mela

2010-07-29T01:43:00.000-07:00

Tyoharo ki thi dastak,
Mela badha raha tha shehar ki raunak.

Gudiya ka baal mann issi baat se tha pareshaan,
Meley kay baare mey sochne kay alawa uske paas nahi tha koi kaam,
Jab se padoosi nay apne ladke ko mela ghuma diya,
Tab se Gudiya nay apni zidd se saara ghar apne sar par uttha liya.
Sabhi nay usse samjhane ki khoob ki kosishein,
Par tham hi nahi thi Gudiya ki farmaishein.

"Gudiya, meley mey kuch nahi hota."

Gudiya - Papa joot bole aap.... meley mey naa....wo naa... jhuley hotay hai, dukaane hoti hai....aur naa...khane, khilonay, aur bahut saari cheeji hai hoti.

"Beti bheed mey bachche pareshaan hai hotay,
Unhe kuch nahi milta aur dikhta hai phir wo bahut hai rotey.
Tum mela kaise dekhogi ?"

Gudiya - Mai jaldi se naa chaat, rasmalai, khaa lungi aur baraf waala gola aapki goodi mey mela dekhte huey khaa lungi.

Mele mey jaane kay liye Gudiya nay itna kiya sangarsh kada,
Uske pita ko uski zidd kay aage jhhukna pada.
Wo apni iss jeet ka poora anand lagi lene,
Uski khushi uske pita ko lagi sukoon dene.

Jaise jaise uske pita nay uski farmaishon ko poora kiya,
Gudiya nay poora mela khreedne ka mann bana liya.

"Papa, batashe ki thaal,
Papa, budhiya kay baal,
Papa, jadoo ka khel,
Papa, badi waali rail."

Jadoo, khane, khel, khilone, gaaje, baaje,
Sab feeke lag rahe thay baap beti ki iss jodi kay aage.

"Beti, ab chalte hai, bahut ghum liye."

"Papa, bas...wo gudiya...chiye."

"Bete, itni zidd nahi karte."

"Chiye....chiye....chiye."

Muskurakar Gudiya kay pita uske liye gudiya lene chal diye,
Bheed mey unke haath chhut gaye,
Phir bhi naa thi koi kami,
Har waqt dono ki nazre ek doosre par hi thi jami.

Pita kay haath mey gudiya dekhkar unki Gudiya chehak utthi,
Par palak jhaapakte hi uski aankhein ek dhamake ki chamak se dehak utthi.

Gudiya ko dikha insaniyat ka chehra naya,

Boom!!!...

....Aur meley ka manzar maatam mey badal gaya.

Har aur bikhri thi laashe,
Ghayal lage thay karahne,
Barood aur khoon kay sangam ki gandh lagi thi aane.

Gudiya to ab bhi ussi aur dekh rahi thi lagaye badi aas,
Iss badle manzar par wo nahi karna chahti thi vishwaas.
Nanhi si jaan ki aankhein tabhi gayi thi pathra,
Jab usne apne pita ko chithaddo mey badalte dekha.
Jaate jaate bhi uske pita nay uski farmaish poori kar di,
Gudiya ki manchahi gudiya uske kadamo mey adhjali si thi padi.

Bantvare, logo.......mey kaun sahi hai kaun galat samajh nahi aata,
Par itna jaanta hun ki mazhab, janta, etc ko kuch logo kay matlab kay liye barso se issi tarah isteymaal hai kiya jaata.

Kashmir, Sikkim, Punjab, Aasam.....kya poora Bharat hi le jaaiye,
Par pehle masoomo ki khushi aur aisi Gudiyaon ka bachpan lautaiye.

देवता पिता

2010-07-29T01:39:00.000-07:00

वो अख़बार ओढ़कर चिंता करते है सारे घर की,
चाहे शक्ल पर थकान दिखाए दफ्तर की.

कौन कहता है पुरुषो मे भावनायें होती है कम,
पापा की ज़ोरदार डांट ध्यान से 'खाओ' वो उनके प्यार से होती है नम.

इनको क्या पता चलेगा ये सोचकर आप से अक्सर होशियारी हो जाती है अपने आप,
पर आप ये भूल जाते है की वो रिश्ते मे लगते है आपके बाप.

चेहरे से ही मन की बात जान जाते,
वो हमको सिर्फ सही रास्ते पर चलता देखना चाहते.

ये ज़रूरी तो नहीं की हर वक़्त पिता अपना प्यार जताए,
क्या ये उनका स्नेह नहीं की वो हमें खुश रखते है मारकर अपनी इच्छाएं.

अक्सर माँ रुपी देवी के पीछे छिपा दिए जाते है अनगिनत देवता तुल्य पिता,
तभी शायद उनपर ना कोई प्राईम टाईम सीरियल...न लाखो कॉलम, फिल्मे व आर्टिकल...और ना ही पुरुष आयोग बना.

Majboor

2010-07-29T01:36:00.000-07:00

"Munni, pani sirhane rakha hai,
chhadi bhi paas rakh di hai, ghar se bahar mat nikalna,
mai jald khana lekar aaunga.”

Kuch dair baad-
“Sir ye hamari company nay ak naya powder launch kiya.....”

“NAHI CHAHIYE”

“Le lijiye naa sir bahut accha ….”

“BOLA NAA NAHI CHAHIYE……NIKLO YAHA SE.”

Agla ghar -

“Sir ye hamari company……….”

“AAGE JAO….”

Aaj to shayad uski pariksha thi,
Jis bhi ghar jaata, Niraasha hi paata.
Jab bhi wo thak haar jaata,
Uski bhuki behan ka chehra,
Usko yaad aa jaata.
Aakhir khaali haath waapas,
Wo kya mooh lekar jaata.
Kamzoori aur thakaan,
Jab haavi honay lagi,
Tabhi umeed ki,
Ek kiran jagi.
Bhatakta wo majboor darbadar,
Pahuncha ak aalishaan ghar.

“Sir ye powder……….”

“WATCHMAN…….YE SALESMAN AANDAR KAISE GHUS AAYA,
ISEY BAHAR NIKALO.”

“Sir…………Sir……le lijiye na sir,
bahut acchi quality ka hai………Sir isskey saath discount bhi hai,
Sir…discount……le lijiye naa sir………Doosra sample free de dunga…
……khareed lijiye naa sir………sir……ek baar……khareed lijiye naa sir.

Uski kisi nay naa suni.

Footpath par baithkar ronay laga wo bechara,
Aaj ek bhai iss zalim duniya se haara.
Soch kar apni anndhi behan ka gham,
uski aankhe ho gayi nam.

Tabhi ek aawaz uske kaano mai padi -

“Babu ji………ye chudiyan le lo na Babuji……,
bahut bhuki hu, Le lo na ..............Babuji”

Uss aawaz ko sunkar gaya wo seham,
Kyoki uske saamne khadi thi uski Behan.
Aaj shayad rona bhi mumkin naa tha,
Uski zindagi ka ye sabse bura din tha.
Iss dukh ko bhi usne piya,
Apni "Munni" ko seney se laga liya.

"Tujhe bhuki nahi rakhunga,
itne gham sahe,
ek aur seh lunga.
Ye duniya to kuch degi nahi,
Aaj mera khoon pekar jee le,
Kal ki kal dekh lunga."

लंगुरिय प्रणाली

2010-07-15T02:01:00.000-07:00

हमारे देश की सरकारी कार्यप्रणाली पर एक व्यंग.

विभागीय सर्वेक्षण से पता चला की नीले लंगूर की प्रजाति को है खतरा,
वन विभाग मे हमेशा की तरह सन्नाटा रहा पसरा.

ना जाने रिपोर्ट ने कितनी धूल खायी?
विभाग की मेजों पर महीनो उछलती फ़ाइल किसी तरह मंत्रालय आयी.

मंत्रालय ने जांच को कमिटी बैठायी,
जो बैठी रह गयी.

पता चलने पर पेटा (PETA) ने बताया की नीला लंगूर खतरे मे नहीं है,
क्योकि वो भारत मे तो क्या दुनिया मे कहीं नहीं पाया जाता.

यह जानकर सरकार हैरत मे आयी...
काले मुह को नीला किसने बताया....
इसकी जांच को नयी कमिटी बैठायी.

Dosti

2010-07-11T04:36:00.000-07:00

This poem is special as my friend used this to impress his now Girl Friend! Though, he did many other things excluding this to woo her. Year 2004!

Insaan akela bhi reh sakta tha,
Akelepan mey jee sakta tha.
Khushi mey apne khayalo mey khota,
Apne aansu khud hi peeta.

Par aisa jeena bhi kya jeena,
Jisme kisi ka saath naa ho,
Bas patjhad ho,
Kabhi barsaat naa ho.

Rahe naa koi tanhaa,
Naa mile kisi ko tanhaai,
Shayad rab nay dosti isliye banayi.

Ek umeed mere paas hai,
Mujhe ak sachche dost ki talaash hai.
Jiske gamo mey mera bhi gam ho,
Jiski aankhein mere liye nam ho.

Chahe ho dard bhari shaam,
Ya ho khushaal savera,
Bas ak apnepan ki chaav deta rahe,
Mujh par pad rahe uske saaye ka pehra.

पढ़कर कोसो!

2010-07-11T04:25:00.000-07:00

Kya baat hai ?
Koi kaam dhandha nahi hai ?
Ya aap bahut tej hai,
Jo har baat sochte sahi hai ?
Arre,Aap kya pagal ya bevkoof hai ?
Jo iss kavita ko padne mai masroof hai.
Ooho,Aap to bura maan gaye,
Waise apni asliyat jaldi jaan gaye.
Aapka hai bahut "third class taste",
Jo iss kavita ko padhne mai kar rahe hai itne seconds waste.
Arre,Himmat to dekho,
Ab bhi padh rahe hai.
Mann hi mann iss kavita kay,
kavi ka gala pakad rahe hai.
Agar aap chahte,
To aise samay barbaad naa karte.
Iski jagah kuch aur padhte,
par nahi agar maan jaate to
"chaganlal" kyu kehlate
Agar aap nahi hona chahte sharmindaa,
To mat padhiyega aisi kavita aainda.
Ab yaha aise mooh to banao naa,
Arre,niklo yaha se.......jao naa.