A Chudail’s Love story – Author Mohit Sharma (Trendster)
Tags: 421 Brand Beedi Federation, Author Mohit Sharma, freelance talents, freelance talents championship, Mohit, Mohit Sharma, mohit trendy baba, Mohit-Trendster,Mohit/Trendster, Mohitness, Poet Mohit Sharma, Trendy Baba, Trendy Baba Mafia, Writer Mohit Sharma
*) – A Chudail’s Love story
(Mohit Sharma Trendster)
(Semi Finals Winning Entry against Author Rahul Ranjan)
Dharti ki taraf badhte hue 2 Yamdoot apne bhavishya ko lekar gehan vartalap kar rahe the.
Yamdootar – “Teri duty bhi Tadapur lagi hai, gaya beta tu. Ab overtime karta firiyo….tere tabadle ki khabar sunkar jis Apsara se tera rishta tay hua tha uske parents bhi ab uski shaadi Mr. Yamdoot 2013 se karva denge.
Waise, yaar ek baat samajh nahi aayi, finals mey to tu bhi pahuncha tha aur tere bhi dole uski takkar ke hai phir kaise haar gaya tu…Mr. Yamdoot ka muqabla….”
Yamdootesh – “Haan! Mai bhi Mr. Yamdoot ban sakta tha. Judges k anusaar to muqabla barabari ka tha phir Tie Breaker mey hum dono ki muchhon ki motai naapi gayi jisme mai aadha se bhi kum millimeter se haar gaya…bilkul photo finish type decision tha. And No way!! Mujhe overtime nahi karna. Waise aesa kya hai Tadapur mey?”
Yamdootar – “Har state mey jaise apni High Court hoti hai waise hi har rajya mey Dev Yamraj ne ek City aur uske aas-paas k gaon-dehat aesi atript aatmaon ko allot kar rakhe hai jo kisi bhi wajah se Yamdoot k saath swarg ya nark nahi jaa sakti. Tadapur mey Bharat ki sabse zyada atript aatmaon ka vaas hai. Bagal mey hi doosre rajya ka gadh Cheemapur sthit hai par wo shaant ilaka hai.”
Yamdootesh – “Haan to kya hua? Mai ek Certified Yamdoot hun, mai aesi tatpunji aatmao se nahi darta…”
Yamdootar – “Bhai, unse cooperate karke chaliyo, ek to wo atript bhoot log hai unhe chunne se kate rehte hai kuch na kuch karne ke. Din mey 2-4 galat kaam karne ki mismisi chhuti rehti hai unme. Sangathit rehne se unki shakti badh gayi hai, wo apne aage kuch nahi dekhte aadmi ho ya yamdoot seedhe baja dete hai joot hi joot.
Jab humari complaints par Dev Yamraj ka bheja koi senior Adhikari inspection k liye aata hai to ye sab bilkul Shone Babu se ban jaate hai, jaise deen duniya ka kuch pata hi nahi, un adhikariyon ke jaane k baad waapas Dhaki-chiki Dhaki-chiki Dhaki-chiki Aau.…humari deadline aur targets miss karvate rehte hai ye Shaitaan ke pille.”
Yamdootesh ka Tadapur mey aagman sukhad nahi hua tha. Dharti par aakar unhe pata chala ki jin 2 Netao ki aatmao ko wo nark le jaane aaye the unko lekar aatmao ki 2 communities mey Gang-war chhida hua hai. Jahan Pappu Pret Gang un Netao k nark jaane se pehle unhe pratadna dena chahta tha wahin Sweety Chudail Gang unhe chhupaye hue tha kyoki un 2 netao ne apne ek khaali farm house ko Sweety Chudail k naam kar diya tha. Pappu Pret apne samarthak Preton k bade dal k saath Sweety Chudail Gang Colony k bahar Bhompu lekar pahuncha.
Pappu Pret – “Yo Sweety! This is not done. Hum Pret-Chudail log padosi hai aur saath bhatakte hai in 2 netao ki to waise bhi nark mey bhat pitni hai us se pehle inhone hum pret logo k saath jo gunah kiye hai uske liye inhe 2-4 din rakh kar agar thoda sa khel le hum Pret jan to kya burai hai….aur Naspitti tu badi zubaan ki pakki ban rahi hai, le liya na Farm House inse ab dafa kar inhe. ”
Sweety – “Farm House itna bada hai, mai ek Chudail only space chahti thi jiske liye wo farm house ekdum perfect hai. Ye Neta kisi Aghori ko set karke aaye hai agar inke nark jaane tak inko bachaya nahi to har doosri jagah ki tarah wo Farm House Babban Bhoot Gang hathiya lega, Bhooton ki majority ka faayda utha kar. Wo risk mai nahi le sakti….”
Pappu Pret – “Lagta hai ab Yuddh ka samay aa gaya hai. Mai shapath leta hun ki jab tak un dono Neta Aatmao k dhar k joot nahi bajaunga aur saath mey har Chudail ki chuttiya nahi fhaaddunga, eye brow nahi noch lunga..tab tak chain se nahi bhatakunga….Preton! Phatt de Chadde…Oh! Sorry…Chak de Phatte!!!”
Sweety Chudail kisi wajah se chup thi aur ek boring Test Ballebaaz ki tarah baaton aur Chill Poo mey Preton ka time nikal rahi thi.
Ye nazara thodi door se dono Yamdoot aur nishpaksh Babban Bhoot Gang k members dekh rahe the.
Yamdootesh – “Oh no! Aese to hum un 2 Netao ko le jaane mey late ho jaayenge aur agar Sweety Chudail ne yuddh ka elaan kar diya to yahan arajakta faail jaayegi. Mujhe unhe rokna hoga….”
“Lagta hai yahan naye aaye ho…Tadapur mey late hone ki aadat daal lo!”
Yamdootesh – “Aapki taareef?”
“Bada jigra hai re….Babban Bhoot ki taareef puchhne waalo ki tashreef kaat di jaati hai. Par teri himmat se hum khush huey. Aa baith…arre baith jaa, abhi nahi lad rahe ye dono gangs. Sweety Gang ki Chudailen paas k kasbe mey Ladies Sangeet mey gayi hui hai, aane mey thoda time lagega. Nahi to abhi tak ho gaya hota inka Commonwealth. Arre Sharma! Iske liye Bhaang ki pakodiyan aur Dhature ka juice lekar aao…”
Yamdootesh – “Mai nasha nahi karta.”
Babban Bhoot – “Arre ek jaam to dushman k saath bhi lagaya jaata hai Darling…”
Yamdootesh – “NAHI !!! Mere kuch usool hai…”
Babban Bhoot – “O Kaka ji! Ye Aadarshvaad ki peepni kahin aur bajaiyo….Natthu! Shake the Babla!”
Babban k ek ishare par Bhooton ki toli ne Yamdootesh ko zabardasti Dhature ka Juice pilaya, Bhaang ki pakodiyan khilayi aur smack ke injections lagaye.
Babban Bhoot – “Haaye thandak si mil gayi ! Sachche, Saaf Dil logo ke usool, aadarsh, pratigya tudvaane ka jo maza hai na wo Eucalyptus par ulta latakne mey bhi nahi hai. Yamdootar samjhao apne dost ko…agar ye beech mey padkar unki ladai rukva dega to unke gang kamzor kaise honge? Inki aapas ki ladai mey 10-12 Pret-Chudail ki punchh kate, 2-4 Apahij hon tab hi to humara gang aur mazboot hoga. Nothing personal, you see politics hai hi aesi cheez.”
Yamdootesh ne nishchit Pret-Chudail yudh ko rokne k liye Dev Yamraj k khaas Sahayak Dev ko emergency call lagayi jo turant apne Yamdooto ki toli ko lekar haazir ho gaye. Aese signals har aatma ko dikh jaate the aur hamesha ki tarah sthiti bhaamp kar sabhi atript aatmayen ‘shona babu’ mode mey aa gayi. Nazara dekh Sahayak Dev Yamdootesh par baras pade.
“Mujhe aapse aesi apeksha nahi thi Yamdootesh! Dekho kitne bhole bhoot, pyaare pret aur cute chudail hai ye sab. Mai to kehta hun ki Mrityulok mey pure innocence kahin hai to wo…..Yahin hai! Yahin hai! Yahin hai!
Masoom, nireeh aatmaon ko pata nahi kyu yahan niyukt hue Yamdoot yun hi badnaam karte hai. Abhi mai in 2 netao ko nark le jaata hun par aage se bina kaaran humey yun bulaya gaya to aap ghor dand aur shaap k bhaagi banenge. Ab hum chalte hai. Bam Bam Bholey!”
Pappu Pret – “Sampail aur Pampail. Jaiye aap log escort kijiye Sahayak Dev ki toli ko. Aajkal zamana bahut kharab hai.” *winks*
Pappu Pret ka ishara samajh Preton ki toli se Pampail Pret aur Sampail Pret, Sahayak Dev k kaafile se sat gaye aur poore raaste bhar Yamlok k dwaar tak dono netao ko saavdhani se rath ki aad lekar ghunse, laat pelte chale gaye.
Idhar Sweety aur Yamdootesh k naina char ho gaye the.
Babban Bhoot – “Yaar! Yamdootar le jaa isko, mai tere dost k ghusand hi ghusand bajaye chala jaunga. Abhi apne senior se daant khaayi hai par sudhra nahi….gandi soch!”
Yamdootesh ko beech mey dakhl dene ki penalty k roop mey usko allot hua quarter Bhooton ko dena pada aur wo Yamdootar k quarter mey shift ho gaya.
Ab wo apna kaam anmane tareeke se karne laga aur udaas rehne laga. Sweety se bhi Yamdootesh k affair ki khabar har taraf thi jis baat se Babban Bhoot, Pappu Pret naraaz the. Ek din wo Yamdootar ko bina bataye vacation par chala gaya. Apne dost k liye Yamdootar ne overtime kiya aur seniors ko bhanak nahi lagne di kuch din. Aakhirkaar, Yamdootesh kaam par lauta par wo kahan gaya tha ye nahi bataya.
Sweety bhi Yamdootesh k waapas aane se khush thi. Ab wo dono chhup-chhup kar milne lage. Ek din aese hi Sweety ki godi mein Yamdootesh sar rakh kar leta tha.
Sweety – “….Ye devlok ka fabric kitna smooth hai, mere liye bhi mangwa do thoda. Tumpar purple dhoti suit karti hai, skin tone k according bahut dashing lagte ho usme. Aur please jab kisi aatma ko pakda karo le jaane k liye, to Gada side mey mat daba kar chala karo awkward lagta hai jaise koi Cricketer out hokar jaa raha ho.”
Yamdootesh – “Alright Janu! jaisa tum kaho. Kitni care karti ho tum meri. Thanks! You know what mai waapas kyu aaya….just because I feel poor when I don’t have your presence…”
Sweety – “Awwwww tumhari aawaz mey Janu kitna cute lagta hai.…aur Please please please tumhari eye brows bahut thick hai please threading karva liya karo kuch weeks mey, koi issue ho to mai kar dungi. Don’t be conscious na…Aajkal ladke bhi karva lete hai.”
Idhar ek Tantrik Yoman Baba ne Tadapur mey pravesh kiya jinka udeshya zyada se zyada aatmao ko mukti dilvana tha. Kai aatmayen aesi thi jinko shaanti k liye manviy roop se kuch jatan karne padte jaise koi apne ghar ke peeche naale ki zameen mey dhan gaad gaya tha apne parivaar k liye par achanak maut se kisi priyjan ko bata nahi paaya, ya kisi ki beti ka padosi k saath affair tha par ye pata chalte hi usko heart attack aa gaya aur unka affair chalta raha, apne padosi aur beti ko saza dene k uske armaan dhare reh gaye upar se jo baat sun kar usko heart attack hua wo uske marne k baad jaari thi….aese hi kai aur adhuri bhautik baaton aatmao ko atript bana diya tha.
Yoman Bana dheere dheere aese bhautik kaamo ko niptane lage aur kuch samay baad adhiktar atript aatmao ke bhautik bandhan toot gaye par ab bhi aatmao ki poorn mukti k liye unke gadh mey Amavas k ratri pahar mey ek maha-hawan baaki tha. Kuch aatmao k case hopeless the unhe kabhi mukti nahi mil sakti thi jaise kisi aatma ne kisi Raja ki poori kaum ko khatm karne ki pratigya lit hi par baad mey pata chala ki us Raja ki 400 se adhik anaitik santaane thi jinki apni kai santane ho chuki thi aura lag alag disha mey kai peedhiyan chal padi thi. 1-2 logo ki baat hoti to pehle Aghori reh chuke Yoman Baba khopche mey leke mundi marodne mey koi gurej na dikhate par baat yahan hazaro lakho logo ki thi. Santosh ki baat ye thi ki aesi hopeless aatmao ki sankhya kum hi thi. Yoman Baba k maha-yagya manshaon ki bhanak Bhooton, Preton aur Chudailon ko ab tak lag chuki thi. Prabhavshaali netao ko darr tha ki itni sankhya aatmao ka mukt ho jaana unke varchasva par prabhav daal sakta hai isliye unhone Yoman Baba ko molest karte hue Tadapur se khaded diya.
Unhe ye bhi pata chala ki itne din jo Yamdootesh gayab tha uska prayojan in Yoman Baba ko Tadapur laana tha. Yamdootesh ki phir se haaziri hui sanyukt sabha mey.
Yamdootesh – “Haan, bulaya maine Yoman Baba ko par mujhe laga tum logo ko shaanti milegi to us se khush hoge. Nahi chahiye shaanti to koi baat nahi. Mujhe aur punish mat karo, mai ab tum logo ki dincharya, ratricharya mey koi interfere nahi karunga. Jo marji aaye karo…”
Idhar Yamdootesh scene se gayab ho gaya aur usko Tadapur aur Cheemapur ki seema par sthit ekaant mey, No Man’s Land….No Ghost’s Land mey dekha jaane laga. Ab Yamdootesh ka Sweety se milna bhi bahut kum ho gaya. Yamdootar ne apne saathi par bilkul giveup kar diya tha.
Sweety ne ek din Yamdootesh ko ek khoobsurat Soni Chudail ke saath hangout karte dekh liya. Sweety aur Yamdootesh mey zabardast jhagda hua aur Sweety ruth kar chali gayi. Idhar Babban Bhoot aur Pappu Pret ka dil bhi Soni Chudail par aa gaya. Cheemapur mey bhi 2-3 prabhavshaali Bhoot, Pret pehle se hi Soni k deewane the. Pappu ne apne prabhav se Soni ko pana chaha par ye divya niyam tha ki bina vivah k doosre rajya ki seema mey pravesh nahi kiya jaa sakta, sirf No Ghost’s Land se koshish ki jaa sakti hai. Yamdootesh k charm se jealous Pappu, Babban ne usey Soni k Swayamvar k liye challenge kiya jo baat sun seema k doosri aur k bade Bhoot, Pret bhi aa gaye.
Soni k swayamvar k liye aagami amavas ki raat yaani agli hi raat nirdharit ki gayi jisme shakti, charisma, dance, singing gigs aadi pratiyogitaon mey dono rajyo k kuch Bhoot, Pret aur Yamdootesh mey muqabla hona tha. Ye aayojan Tadapur aur Cheemapur ki seema par hona tha jisko dekhne k liye dono taraf ki atript aatmao ki bheed lag gayi. Saathi Yamdootar ne Yamdootesh ko chaitavni di ki agar wo Chudail se shaadi par ada raha to wo high command shikayat kar usko suspend karva kar inhi atript aatmao ka ek saath banva dega. Par Yamdootesh par koi asar nahi pada.
Muqable hote gaye aur har muqable mey Yamdootesh jeetta raha. Idhar apne hero ko kisi aur ko pane k liye inti intensity dikhate hue Sweety ka dil ro raha tha. Wo apna Chudail gang lekar wahan se ud chali.
Yamdootar ne bhi apni shikayat darj ki jiska review Amavas mey adhik shaktishaali huyi duniya bhar mey aatmao ki shaitaniyon ki wajah se abhi pending tha aur karyavahi swaroop Sahayak Dev ko aane mey abhi kuch ghante lagne the.
Yamdootesh – “Kyu be Babban, Pappu…badi mismisi chhuti rehti hai, supporters ki bheed mey Vidhayako waala style maarte ho, bheed ki aad mey to bade laat-ghunse chalate ho. Ab aao one on one….na tum dono ki poonch kaat di to mera naam Yamdootesh nahi Kaddukesh.
Kaafi der tak chale muqablon mey sabhi maamlo mey Yamdootesh ne bade margin se comprehensive victories darj ki.
Aakhir mey jab varmala dalne ki baat aayi to Soni Chudail ne Cheemapur k ek Bhoot k gale mey varmala daali. Sab achambhit the ye kya hua. Ye khabar Khabri Chudail ne Sweety ko di to wo bhi kotuhal mey waapas venue par aa pahunchi.
Yamdootesh ne announcement kiya.
“Aaj Amavas ki raat jab aatmayen sabse adhik shaktishaali hoti hai us din bhi apna poora zor laga kar Swayamvar mai jeeta hun sirf apne prem se mili prerna ki wajah se par wo Swayamvar Soni k liye nahi tha, mera Swayamvar to Sweety k liye tha.”
Peepal par ulti latki achambhit, avaak Sweety dhadaam se zameen par giri.
“Ye sab ek natak tha jisme mere saath Cheemapur ki achchhi aatmayen shaamil thi. Unse milkar mujhe pata chala ki atript aatmayen hamesha huddangi ya bawaali nahi hoti balki achchh ibhi ho sakti hai bas unke neta aur disha nirdesh karne waali badi aatmayen achchhi honi chahiye. Soni ki pehle se hi shaadi ho chuki thi aur usne apne pati k gale mey hi varmala daali. Sweety ko bhi maine ye plan late bataya. Ab jab mai aap sabko sambodhit kar raha hun to bata dun ki Yoman Baba phir se Tadapur ki seema mey hawan kar rahe hai aur mere mic par swaha bolte hi wo poorn aahuti denge jis se aapme se adhiktar aatmao ko mukti mil jaayegi….. Yoman Baba Swaha!”
Isi k saath kai aatmayen aakash mey vileen ho gayi. Bas kuch Bhoot, Pret Neta aur Sweety samet kuch Chudailen bach gayi.
Babban Bhoot – “Par….humne to Tadapur mey jagah-jagah apne guard Bhoot-Pret chhode the kisi aapatkaaleen baat k liye….”
Yamdootesh – “….wo beech mey uth k jo Sweety Gang gaya tha wo kya ladies sangeet karne gaya tha? Kuch se to Yoman Baba khud nipat liye aur kuch ko sula diya Sweety & Company ne. Aur Ab zara tameez mey rehna 5-7 bache ho total usi style mey joot hi joot bajaunga jaise tum kabhi bajate the.”
Yamdootesh ne Yoman Baba ko Babban aur Pappu ko peetne, molest karne ka poora mauka diya. Phir unka dhanyavaad kar unko vida di. Inspection karne aaye Sahayak Dev eksaath itni aatmao ki mukti se khush dikhe par unhe verify karna tha ki kya Yamdootesh ne kisi Chudail se Shaadi ki hai.
Wo Tadapur mey bachi 4-5 Chudailon ki neta Sweety se mukhatib hue.
“Kya Yamdootesh ka kisi sthaniye ya videshi Chudail se chakkar chal raha hai? Kya wo aapki taraf aakarshit hote hai?”
Sweety Chudail – “Aapko galat soochna mili hai. Yamdootesh bahut hi kartavyaparayan Yamdoot hai. Itni aatmao ko shaanti pahuchane ka poora shrey unhi ko jata hai. Kuch prabhavshaali Bhooton ke dabaav mey wo sandesh aap tak gaye the. Waise bhi hum badsurat Chudailon ki aesi kismet kahan jo hum unhe paa saken…”
Ye sun Yamdootesh bhavuk ho gaye.
Sahayak Dev samanya sthiti dekh Yamdootar ko warning dekar chale gaye.
Sweety Chudail – “Prem karne se pehle duniyadaari ki sudh nahi rehti aur jab duniyadaari ki sudh aati hai tab tak prem ho chuka hota hai. Mujhe pehle hi pata tha ki humara milan nahi ho sakta par mai to pehle se hi atript hun isliye adhoori aankanshaon ki aadat hai Sweety ko. Tumhe door se hi sahi prem karti rahungi….”
Uske baad anya rajyo ki tarah Tadapur mey bhi vyavastha dharre par aayi aur wahan ki is doosri duniya mey bhi shaanti aayi.
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